ThreadI'm coming to terms with ending my life early.
I just want to reiterate this and posts like this in the thread. Even if things seem bleak at the moment, that doesn't mean things will continue to be that way forever. Things can change for the better. You are worth loving, especially by yourself. Your life is worth living.
I've struggled with depression and anxiety for half of my life for a number of reasons, and still am. There were times where it really felt like things could never get better, and I was only carrying on out of love for those dear to me, and not myself. A little over a year ago I reached out to a health professional for the first time, and though I still struggle a lot, it's made a world of difference. I was able to slowly make progress with healing from trauma on my own, and don't mean to undermine what I was able to accomplish in that time, because I'm incredibly proud of myself for it given the circumstances. But getting the support you need can really accelerate that process. I was fortunate enough to already have support from friends, but making this step was life changing for me.
OP, if it's at all possible for you to increase the support and help you get, please try to look into it. Just know that we're here for you, even if it seems like no one else is.