I won't pile on with the judgment. Both of them need a time out and ton of counseling. He needs rehab. This is not how two adults engage with one another. Not okay at all. Terrible example for the child. I've been there regarding these tense stalemates when what I'm working on needs just a matter of minutes, but my wife wants me to stop NOW. Oh there is sometimes shouting. These two, from the OP, are just on another level altogether. They should both be charged, but I'm sure it was an act of desperation on her part because he was not willing to listen. It was probably the nth time she'd asked him to stop that day, and it was always one more match I'm sure. I hope they both get the help their family needs. It probably won't resolve well, but I can still hope it does. He needs serious rehab.