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H.Protagonist's Posts

Published

(29437816)

Thread All public schools in Japan ordered closed until April
I have two small kids in school in Hyogo. This is going to absolutely devastate my work this month. I can't tell if it's a fair reaction to the situation by the government or not based on how things have been going, but it's going to be a difficult month, that's for sure. I have no idea what I'm going to do.
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
It's a bit of a double-edged sword that. :) You'll need to hype it (at least a little) to get more eyes/the feedback you want. Forgive me if I missed it, but is the Twitter account your only channel right now? And, be more confident! It looks good! You find plenty of people interested in something like this.I like all your details, but where will this information be posted? I think for a first/initial promo post for your game you should tighten/shorten up your points (as people are notorious for skipping over long text) for the initial post, then dole out extended details to highlight each of these sections later. It'll give you more material to work with for more future posts and hold more people's attention at the outset. The full detailed breakdown can be posted on your game hub (wherever that will be). Ex. 1,000,000 square kilometers to conquer. The Forged Kingdoms is a next gen RPG where actions have consequences. From massive empires to individual blades of grass, every single element of the world is a product of your choices. Just riffing here (and I haven't gotten to use Cimmercian in ages), but you get the idea. If you want to build up a community, you'll need steady updates and this'll give you more fodder to expand on later instead of showing all your cards now.
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(29228442)

Thread The Ringer asks: "What do you think is the worst thing you have to sit next to on a plane?"
Can't stand snorers (I can't hear them, even with headphones on), but my biggest pet peeve is guys who encroach on my space. Half the time they're not even big, they just spread and appropriate the arm rests and wing their elbows and legs into my area every single time. I hate it. Even when it gets to a point that I actually need to ask them to stop, they keep doing it over and over. It's exhausting and annoying. EDIT to add: Babies are fine. They can't help it, and I feel terrible for them and their parents, especially now that I'm a parent and have flown many, many times with mine.
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
I'm not sure there's a point to doing one for my small project, but I used to do this kind of stuff for publishers and I loved it. Have you made up/thought about a marketing plan or are you just winging it as you go?
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
An update! Got the preliminary sketches from the artist, so it looks like this thing is well and truly a go. There are a few tweaks to be made, but even just seeing the draft is exciting. ^_^Well, we'll see how it goes. It could be a total dud once all the elements are combined. ^_^ At least I won't have burned too much time/effort on it if so! At least the art will be pretty, right? And cheers for the Visionaire suggestion and offer to help. I appreciate it, really. I had downloaded it ages ago and toyed with it a bit, but right now with 2 small kids, work, and brain fry from foreign country language overload, I'm extremely grateful to find a programmer willing to help me out with this part. Writing is a relaxing past-time for me, but technical stuff seems my bane of late. And I can't even remember to put on my outdoor shoes some days...Thanks for the breakdown, Kazooie! Really interesting to see. I'm impressed you got kits! Those are notoriously a pain to get (though, somewhat depending on which 1st party, I'd say). And it's amazing that you've released on so many platforms! Just remembering doing even basic stuff like updating devkits gives me the shivers.With our powers combined...! :D Talent swaps rule and are super fun~Of course, and I'm happy to pay for work I can't do myself, especially for people who do this for a living. I'm jealous that you're so skilled with the art side of things. Definitely saves money! :) I can draw, but not well enough for something like this. I've been lucky so far that I've been able to find a lot of talent willing to do trades for pieces in exchange for help on their own projects (potentially even a talented music guy now at this point), and this is a small enough experiment that it's not going to break the bank even if I have to pony up a bit more. This project is also a learning experiment that I'm sure I'll be able to put to use and do more myself in the future if I want to do another.It was only on a whim that I posted that day too. I feel very lucky that we both had such well-suited needs at the same time.
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
Thanks, H! It's really neat to see to the breakdown! Art definitely seems to be the big $$ item for most (I imagine that's because most people handle the other big component--programming--themselves). Considering the overall quality I've seen, though, it seems like money well spent. Very eye-catching and attractive. It sets the world tone and gives you plenty to work with for marketing materials. :) For the composer, is the cost there for multiple songs? I'll only have the one BGM, and it's more ambient sound w/ a beat than a song, but he's thinking a 1 minute loop, with 4 subtle variations of that, chained together as a 5 minute loop, so there's some real thought in it. If it comes out well, it's definitely money well spent, but I had originally just set my overall limit as $500 for art/music/incidentals since it's a hobby (not commercial) project. I may have to rethink that now after seeing the quote and needing (wanting) a few more things like an animated fireplace, candles, start screen art, etc. And after seeing what other people are putting towards their projects... ^_^; For your break even point, 1600 units (or the $ equivalent of) on Steam seems doable. It's a pretty populated field, but of late I feel like I see VNs talked about more than other genres, and the price point seems attractive. Might take a few Steam sales to get over the line, but I'm sure you can do it. :DHaha. A very modest budget, indeed! I'm jealous that you have such a wide range of skills. I have to rely on more talented people than myself for almost everything. I'm excited to pull the pieces together, though. For my game, as pulled up (thank you~), I'm going for a simple point-and-click that consists of only 3 rooms. ^Just LOOK at this sexy notebook doodle. AAA material, amirite? :D Since writing is my 'talent' in this field, the game is entirely built on using incidental text, dialogue, and books as a narrative device. That's pretty much it. I figure that if I can tell a tight, compelling story on a small scale, then maybe I can shop it around as proof of concept for a bigger version that I have in mind. Either way, it's a fun creative project and I've always wanted to make a game. Seems like a good test.
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
Nothing to show yet on my end, but I have since picked and have an agreement with an artist now, outlined the general overview and laid out the gameflow/particulars of the first 'arc', and am in discussions with a sound guy for my BGM. I was wondering, though (if anyone cared to share), what kind of budgets people were working with for the various parts of their games. The artist I chose is going to be $300 for the 3 room backgrounds that I mentioned last time (right on the money, Hanuli!)(she agreed to throw in the mirror-imaged room w/ minor tweaks at no cost), and I've been quoted a similar number for the BGM w/ a bit of trade thrown in, but I don't really have frame of reference to know if that's about right. He's a professional and seems to know his suss, so I'm inclined to think he's made a lot of concessions for me, especially since it would be a peanuts project for him. Very curious/interested to hear what anyone else is doing/done for their game pieces (art, music, sound effects, editing, QA, VO, etc.). The budget part of this has certainly been a learning experience, especially when I put it out there on Twitter and some people have spent numbers like $3000 on art alone, or have budgeted $45k(!) for their personal projects. Wow, I say, wow.Everyone's amazing, right? Seeing stuff like 's character art, 's 'bits' (Holy smokes, Rob), the nuts and bolts of 's VN, 's animation work, and getting their stuff up (congrats, you guys!), and 's trailer, and many, many more... Really motivating stuff.
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
Wow. Looks amazing! If that's the lower cost option, then happy days all around. When I do find an artist (I'll nose around r/pixelart more), I'll get quotes for that and Weltall's suggestion and see what comes up. Thanks! For the coding/proofing, I think a collab is definitely worth entertaining! English is my native language, I'm a published author, and editing/proofing video game text is my professional career. :D I'll have to show you my design docs once I get them typed up and see what you think, but in terms of proofing a VN, that's right in my wheel house.Oh, great point. I'll definitely get a quote for that resolution as well, because it certainly sounds handy. Thanks! For the palette, I'm rather new to this part of it all, so is this something you compile yourself or choose from standard options or...? As I'm just going for an old library feel (like the one in the pic) I was just going to show that example image (and others). The game is literally just those 3 parts of the same big room, so hopefully there won't be any need for redoing things down the line (too much).
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
Thanks, Hanuli! For the project, it's super basic. Just a concept test, really, but I'll need pixel art and some basic programming done, so I'm trying to set the budget. It's a simple, 2-D pixel, point and click game with only 3 'rooms' that are just one area (a library). 1 - [left side of library, with a door] 2 - [center of library with a fireplace bookended by two leather chairs] 3 - [right side of library with a near-duplicate door of the one on the left side] This look: In something like this style: To start, I'm just looking to commission the backgrounds (3 screens) so that I have a visual for the design doc and can potentially use it for the game itself. Eventually it would be nice to have the fireplace animated as well as some minor objects, but that'll be at a later date. What do you think this kind of work would entail? Time-wise, cost-wise, etc. Any thoughts (or recommendations!) very welcome. Cheers for the help!
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
Thanks very much for all the details and insight! Super helpful. For the background dimensions, did you choose 600 x 170 pixels over 640 x 400 for any particular reason other than price? Is 600 x 170 more common for say, STEAM games? For level of detail, I do want something that hearkens back to the age of Monkey Island and Gabriel Knight, but there's a lot of wiggle room to be had. It might just come down to shopping around for an artist with a distinctive 'cozy' style and working with what they're most comfortable with for the best result. I don't mind paying a bit more ($300 sounds pretty reasonable to me, especially if it might include some little animations), but it's good to know that the image I picked isn't too pricey. I love your backgrounds (quality stuff and great mood), btw. Did you 'shop around' a lot or was he recommended? His style isn't quite what I'm going for, but if you have any recommendations/places you know that I might find a good artist, I'm all ears. I went down the reddit rabbit hole and it's endless... For reference material, thanks for sharing yours! I definitely have a number of materials/details for the setting, and it's great to see an example. I'll be sure to provide a lot of explanation, and I'd not considered the color palette at all. Cheers! For coding, I'm looking to hire someone for that as well. I do some narrative design/work on a lot of development docs, so I know how I want things to unfold/function, but I'm probably going to save myself the struggle and hire someone to do it for me. Like the art/background, it'll be super simple (just clicking on books, reading them, going between the 3 rooms (not even sure if I'll bother to have a character walking around or just do 1st person view), incidentals, commentary as you click on various objects, simple menu choices, etc.), but I need help for sure. Any recommendations of people or sites? I'm open to paying, collab exchange (I'm a text editor/writer/marketing), etc.
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Thread Hobby and Indie Game Dev |OT 2020| Discussion, Help and Show-off
I have a somewhat general question about costs/time for some backgrounds on a personal project I'm working on if any pixel artists/programmers have a minute to let me pick their brain. I can always take it to reddit or something if this isn't the place, but since we have an indie dev thread right here I thought I'd try.
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(28222623)

Thread Do you have/want children?
That's part of what's currently tipping the scales into the 'no' side for a third. We live abroad and move a lot, so there's zero help and navigating a foreign language makes this extra challenging, plus I work full time which means doing all of my work in chunks while the kids are at school (only 3 hrs worth of time w/ the commute) and after dinner. Shit's tiring. But at the same time, having one here would fulfill a prophecy. Decisions, decisions... Also, in case people don't know, one of the reasons (not the biggest, but definitely part of it) women in Japan are also opting out of kids is the process itself. Hospitals do not offer epidurals here as a standard. Some new/specialized hospitals do but not very many, from what I've been told, and those have long waiting lists. Not giving women here that choice is deterring many.
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Thread Do you have/want children?
It's just the board/online mentality. It skews younger here as well. Outside of the Internet, my impression is that it's more 70-30 or less (though maybe not in specific countries). Still a high number compared to earlier generations, but not without reason. I think it's great that people aren't letting themselves be pressured into it anymore and think about it more.
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(27856148)

Thread Free Portrait Drawings!
I think you mean KABLAM! Wow. Such delicate line work, the shading...! Even small details like the freckles. There's a feel of something FF about it. Tactics Ogre? I love it, thank you. Good gravy, woman, you're a machine! A machine of happiness! Thank you for the amazing, freeing, portrait. I love the colors and scene switch. You're a dreamweaver~ Are you, Dice, and Jo-awn going to post so I can return the favor?
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Thread Midsommar - go and watch it, it's fantastic
Put me down in the 'eh' group. Visually beautiful, interesting play on the relationship/main couple, but tonally meandering, and I felt like it completely squandered the horror elements. If it hadn't been sold as a horror film, I probably would have liked it better, but it was just disappointing in that regard. Far preferred Hereditary. Found what went down between the other couple and the guy who invited them/what it implied waaaaay more unsettling than much else in the film.
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(25970544)

Thread When should you stop bathing with your kids?
Yeah, probably up to and around 5. I hop in with my girls (22 months and a 3.5 year old) sometimes when they ask, and I will probably when we get to Japan (as the bath is bigger and we'll go to onsens), but I'd say that/when they start wanting independence is a general guideline. My husband gets in with them as well still, and this actually came up the other day. He thought bathing together would go till much later as per what he'd been told from his friends/coworkers in Japan (like, up till teens) and as an American I thought that was hella weird. Haha. EDIT: What's with all the "I'd never bathe with my kids" votes? Wow.
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Thread MIDSOMMAR - First Trailer - from director Ari Aster (Hereditary)
Finally got to see it. I was really excited after watching Hereditary, but while I think it was beautiful and very interesting, it wasn't scary at all. Just felt like a different angle on ^Not sure what would be considered a spoiler, so just tagging everything.
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Thread Human Guinea Pigs About to Embark on World's First 20-Hour Airline Flight
I've done long haul (~16hr) plenty of times, so 20hrs doesn't seem much different. I've always relished the reading/writing time too. Flying long haul with kids has been grueling, but even 13+ with a baby was doable. Ticket grade certainly helps, though.
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Thread Jamie Vardy's wife has been leaking Wayne Rooney's wife's private affairs to the press. Busted by Coleen.
Same. Was just scrolling through the comments and there it was. I don't know what I expected either, but that wasn't it...
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Thread My experience being part of the millennial workforce
Same. After hard yards as a mover, groundskeeper, restaurant stuff, baking, etc., an office job was amazing (I confess I love coffee and podcasts...). It's definitely boring sometimes, and if you want to feel fulfilled, a job is generally not where you're going to get it. Like you say, it's just a means to an end, and there are so many ways to pursue the things that are fulfilling no matter how wacky or out there these days. You just have to go for it.
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Thread What is the most painful, excruciating, and terrifying way to die that you have seen in fiction?
It's absolutely horrible, but I'd say the relative 'quickness' of the death makes it less than some of the other gruesome stuff I've read. Will have to find some quotes later. And in before anyone else says Vogon poetry.
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(25001947)

Thread Ending a relationship over kids
As a kid plus, they're also amazing for fitness! Thanks to them I still fit into my mom' jeans from 1975. They run you around sure, but I have no motivation for gym stuff, so it's been ace.
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Thread Cooking ERA - Let's share our best tips
Keep it simple (good butcher quality mince, salt and pepper) and use grated onion. I've found that doing a mixture of different kinds of mince also adds a little something. Ex. Short rib mince, mince brisket, etc. Oh, and make sure you use the right kind of cut to keep it moist like chuck (you need something with a decent fat %).
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Thread Ending a relationship over kids
Not that the physical stuff is any joy (first kid at almost 35, second baby at 36 and I'm 38 now), but being older we seem to be handling it a lot better mentally than some younger couples we know. If I go for a third I'll probably be 40 by then. Would not look forward to the pregnancy at all, but def less stress at this ripe old age. :D
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Thread Ending a relationship over kids
I broke up with my boyfriend of three years that I loved over this exact thing. I'd never particularly wanted or thought about kids until my late 20s, but by 29 I was sure that I did want them. I knew he was pretty much against them, so I put it to him frankly to think about and make a decision. He decided against, so I moved out and said my goodbyes. As much as I loved him and he loved me, this is just one of those decisions you have to make honestly or it leads to bitterness down the line. If he'd grudging agreed and we did only for him to resent the baby/new responsibilities, then it would have been miserable for both of us. If I'd decided to stay with him and not have kids, I would have grown to resent him and myself for lost time and the future I'd wanted. It hurts to break things off when nothing particularly seems wrong, but this is a life changing decision. Don't waste each other's time or futures. That's love.
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Thread How often do you read novels?
I can't imagine not reading regularly, but I totally understand life (and the internet) getting in the way. I made a New Year's resolution to do at least 26 books this year (half the 1 a week challenge), but I'm only on book 11 right now. The next three months are going to be a real race. In my defense, I kept picking 800+ page books. :P Wow. Amazing numbers. I really need to just turn off the comp and buckle down. If you ever run out of options or need a short page-turner to get you over the challenge bar, I recommend mine. The way you read you'd burn through it over dinner.
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Thread UK's Thomas Cook goes bankrupt, 600,000 tourists stranded
Bummed to hear it for everyone that's used them. My solicitor told me last Fri that she'd recently booked with them, her first vacation since having twins, and they were waiting to hear if TC would get bailed out to save their trip. :( Massively shitty for all those people. I hope most were booked on ATOL-protected schemes.
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Thread Parents Era, how early did/would you let your kid exposed to gadgets and have full control of them?
I put 10+ and I have 2 kids (a 2 yr old and a 3.5 year old). I'm sure they'll have to use something for school eventually, but they don't get to play with the phone or ipad or anything. The exception is long flights where we'll pull up some Hey Duggee or Sarah and Duck, etc. for a bit. Other than that I just give them books to read or coloring/activity stuff. I'm not trying to insulate my kids from tech or anything, but we don't use it as a distraction or play thing, atm.
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Thread Has anyone ever been able to successfully quit caffeine?
I've done it 3x for almost a year each. It's not bad at all. You get used to it and you sleep better. You need to replace the motion with something else like decaf coffee/tea or an apple (crunching on these are better than a cup of coffee for stimulating your brain apparently), etc. to ease you into it. Find other ways to 'energize' yourself like a spot of 10 min yoga or stretching to start the day, too.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
I don't even know what to say... I'm so, so terribly sorry. Please don't berate yourself or feel guilty over venting. Like theaface said, it's normal and those feelings are normal. Sending you all thoughts and what comfort I can from across the sea.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Yeah, I can imagine how super tough it is if you're not on the same page. One step forward, two steps back when the system changes. Even though my husband and I both agreed, I knew it would be stressful and we had to firmly see it through, so I waited for one of his longer business trips to do it on my own. Lucky man left a 4-6x wake up per night terror and came home to a 7-7 sleeper. Is there a chance your wife might take a trip so you can buckle down?
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
Oops. Sorry missed this. In the end I left a tip for the cleaners on the bed, and when I went down to pay there was also a gratuity line at the bottom of the bill where both the main staff lady (with the owner sitting at desk next to her) told me that I could leave something there if I wanted and that they pooled everything and split it. So I left some there as well, and made sure to mention I'd left some on the bed. The impression I got after they rang it up, though, was that it was either not what they normally got or what they wanted. They certainly didn't blink and I barely got a good bye. A somewhat flat way to end a fairly nice trip. Oh well.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
I used a modified version of what they call the "Extinction" method. It's similar to some of what GiJose said about the checking at intervals that gradually increase. As he mentioned, babies of ~6 months are capable of sleeping through the night without needing to eat, so that's considered the time you can give it a go. You check that they're freshly changed, fed before bed (we used to do it right before bed), comfortable, etc. You do whatever mini-routine you do for your bedtime (we did a sound app on, a little bit of rocking, and then into the cot), and then leave. When they fuss or cry, wait a few minutes first, then go in and gently pat or lay your hand on their back or chest for reassurance, but don't pick up or talk. Just pat a little, or wait for a few moments, then leave. If they fuss or cry, wait for a slightly longer interval. Rinse repeat. I did this, and the longest interval I got to was not quite 30 mins on the first day, less than 20 mins the next day, and on the third day I only had to go in once (at the 7min? mark). After that she was pretty much 7-7. Before this I'd been getting maybe one 2hr stretch of sleep at best and she'd wake 4-6x a night. It was hell. She's been fantastic ever since (she's almost 4 now), and there have been no behavioral issues or concerns. She's a lovely kid and the full night of sleep has had a good effect on her as well. We have to remember that it's not just us getting crummy sleep but them too. Anyway, if you want more details, I'm happy to share via PM if you like. There are things you can do to pave the way before you try it like we did.It was the weight tracking that revealed it. I breastfed both kids, and my first kid had pretty 'loose' poop, so when baby #2 had it I didn't think anything of it. That's just what breastfed poop looked like in my mind. She also didn't fuss at the boob or seem bothered by eating. She just slept horrifically (also like my first). After the 3rd weigh-in, though, it started to show that she wasn't gaining almost anything. She went from 50th percentile at her first weigh-in (even gained after being born!) down to between the 2nd and 9th, and no matter what I did to feed more or increase production or even supplement, she barely put on anything. They couldn't test her for a dairy allergy at that age, but they suggested it might be it and put me on a no-dairy diet (hell) and then Neocate, a super hypoallergenic formula. Eventually I had to stop breastfeeding completely at 4-ish months and just use the formula. She gained finally and stopped doing a nosedive in the weight department. She also started sleeping through the night on her own at 7 months. They said that the cramps/irritation/gas from the dairy allergy was most likely the thing that woke her so much, and she would comfort feed for the pain, but that would just bring more irritation because of the allergy... -_- I felt so horrible. Everything's sorted now, but her poop is horrendous if she has anything with concentrated dairy in it still. Never seemed fussed aside from that, though. Have you guys had any weight gain issues?
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
There won't be any consistency for a while. 2 months is still really young. Some kids sleep well from the get-go, but both of mine were up 4-6+ times a night to eat or crying (my 2nd had an unknown dairy-allergy which exacerbated that). At 6 months I did sleep training with the first after laying a lot of self-soothing groundwork, and it worked beautifully. Only took 3 days and from then on she was 7-7ish. She's 3 now and still does that (she does wake up to go to the bathroom, but she handles that herself and then goes back to bed). With the second I wanted to do sleep training, but she had weight issues from the dairy allergy, so it wasn't an option. She eventually started sleeping through the night on her own at 7 months, and she's on the same schedule as the 3 year old right now (7-7ish). It just takes time sometimes. I don't think you can expect any really consistency before 6 months, and even then you might have to think about options like sleep training, etc. Have you guys had any weight issues? If so, you might have a dairy problem like we did which made sleep almost impossible for the baby bc of all the gas/cramps. Might be worth looking into if you have other symptoms.
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Thread Do/would you let your kids watch YouTube at the table?
No, and not planning to. I have a 3.5 year old and a 21 month old, and we don't do devices at the table (or at all, really). We make exceptions for long air flights, however, so like every other parenting thing it's whatever you're comfortable with, and I'm just not comfortable using them except when other people are trapped with us. :P I have no idea what other parents' situations are like, though, so it's just a personal choice.
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Thread Anybody shop at Aldi?
Aldi is great. I can do almost a week's worth of shopping/meals there at ~£30-40 for a family of four (though the 2 kids are still small-ish). Good stuff too. Plus our local staff is really nice.
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Thread Hong Kong Airport cancel all flight due to protester gathering due to police and govt action [UP: Second day of protests]
My father-in-law flew there yesterday and we haven't heard anything from him since. :/
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
But when it's a hotel the numbers are going to be bigger. If the bill is a couple of hundreds, what significant number should I round up to? I can't just bump a couple of £s up, right?10% on the whole bill? That'd be...a fair amount. Again, this is a hotel not a restaurant.
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
It's a high end B&B with breakfast and a course dinner, so there's quite a bit of service. For the dinner, as it's part of the overall stay I didn't think I was supposed to leave anything at the table per se, but it's a confusing point as it is quite a bit of service with no bill until the end, so I can't just leave money on the bed for the cleaners as it wouldn't reach the dinner servers. So I asked directly and the receptionist said it was customary to "leave something at the end" if I wanted to, which to me implies that it's normal to tip something. I also assume that means I do it when I settle the final bill. Except, I don't know what's appropriate considering the overall price. -_- According to the web you're supposed to leave service tips at high end hotels, but no one ever says how much or where/when exactly. *sigh*
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
Thanks! It's been great so far. The skies opened up just as I was halfway to the Black Spout, but that's been about it. The only niggly bit now is the question that always gets me conflicting answers, i.e.: How much should I leave as tip (at a nice hotel, specifically)? Last time I asked this in the Brit thread everyone said no tip anywhere (England, though), yet every restaurant, cafe, etc. had a tip option on their machines and/or a tip jar. Web sites are also giving me conflicting info. I don't want to leave an insulting amount or go overboard. I did straightforwardly ask the staff what the tipping etiquette was and she said at the end was standard if I wanted to, so it seems a normal thing, but again, how much? -_-
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
I made sure to bring both, but it's been unexpectedly nice. Fingers crossed it stays that way till Monday!
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
How lucky to have family in such a beautiful location! The rain is a shame, but it looks like the kind of place where even a gloomy forecast just makes it more attractive. Will look into Blair Atholl. Cheers!
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
It a struggle to find a room for the three days. In the end I had to split it first day in one place, last two in another. That could be great for company/joining up with random people for town stuff. Or a bother with crowds, as you say. -_- I'll definitely try at least one distillery, and I'll check out the Moulin Inn after a long walk around Loch Faskally maybe. And lunch at the chippie on the way out? Thanks for all the suggestion (thank you, everyone else, as well!). You seem to know a lot. Are you a local?
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
Thanks! I'm sure it'll be fine. The place looks lovely and I expect to spend most of it indoors with a whiskey at this rate anyway. Never hurts to be cautious, though.
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
No worries! I picked it because it was a little different, so I wasn't expecting many to even know of it.Oh yeah? Even in the rain? The weather is forecast to be absolutely abysmal, unfortunately. I'm not put off by rain, but if it's all about view, I'm not sure it'll be worth a hike out.Yeah, kind of wishing it was later now with the weather, but it was a spur of the moment 'break', so it's just about being somewhere else, really. Walks sound nice. Any thoughts on the safety of the area? I'm not timid, but traveling alone makes me more cautious.No car, I'm afraid. I'l be taking almost 7 hours of trains, though!
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Thread ScotERA | OT | You're Scottish? Your English Is Really Good.
This thread doesn't seem to be the most active, but on the off chance... If anyone has any recommendations for Pitlochry, I'll be there on Friday. I've heard the distillery might be worth a visit?
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Thread My God, The Proportions In One Piece Are All Messed Up
I think Oda has great variety for body types, men and women. Yes, he does the ridiculous big boob-tiny waist thing, but he also does plenty of different ones that people have already posted like the Amazon Lily examples, Big Mom/kids stuff, etc. I'm not fussed about his style/favorite 'shape'.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Thank, Zulu. I got to expand on it a bit in my formal email pitch to the editor, but a non-written book is going to be a very hard sell, methinks. ^_^; Kicking myself for not pitching DE first. Oh well. For yours, it's a plus either way then. I mean, even just writing the pitches has been good practice for everyone, so if nothing comes of it, then it was still good experience. And you sound like you've got a ton on your plate as it is. You're such a prolific writer, though. You can bang out numbers like no one's business. My hopes are still for your side project. :)Possibly? But they could have just held the deadline and said that they were now going to start going through it properly. Maybe it's a good sign that they're going to greenlight a few projects and not just one? We can always hope, right? :D
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
True, but I think you were in a more understandable position. I've barely had what can be called a 'first date', man! I gotta play it cool. So, so cool. As I go and look at her twitter feed for any activity... :DI got the request from the first editor listed on Rebellion's tweet, but there are two more, and I haven't seen any obvious activity from them, so I think they're waiting and seeing what the full breadth of choices are before they go in and pick ones. I think there's still more to come. And ooo, a comic! You'll post it if your SO does it, right? I don't think that should hold you back from pitching it if it gets picked, though. The comic could always come after. Best of both worlds~
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
"We had 1k replies within the first 24 hours, and I both regretted every life decision that had led me to that point, and laughed so hard at how enthusiastic, wonderful and simply bonkers the world of writers can be. " Haha. To say they're inundated is possibly the understatement of the year. I loved reading everyone's ideas, though. Plenty I'd put on my bookshelf if they do it. It's a good write-up/advice. I want to 'like' it on Twitter, but I don't want her to think I'm 'waving frantically' at her now, as she puts it. Also, she makes it sound they're keeping it open for another week which seems crazy. Surely not?
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Threw in a second pitch for my completed book/series because my current publisher (that's sadly shutting their doors) gave me the go-ahead. Things have been quiet on the Rebellion tweet, though, so I wonder if they're saving final picks for the end of the week to round it out.Like others, you had me at "space whales." I didn't see this one when reading through the replies on Rebellion's tweet. I really hate that Twitter cuts a bunch out. I want to see all of them, dammit!
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Thank you!I think the chances are preeeeetty slim given how many responses they've had and how good a number of them are, plus the fact that there's nothing written for it (among other things). I attached a list of my published stuff to show that I have written stuff andwrite this, but I 'm hovering just above "no hope." But yeah, it would be panic stations if they did. @Thanks, Flowers!Cheers!Neat! It's a bit like that episode of Cowboy Bebop with Ein. I'd read that.Thanks, yo!
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
I think Twitter does truncate replies a bit for viewers, but the account themselves should see all of them. Do you want me to see if it shows up when I look? You can give me your handle here or in PM if you like.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Just finished my cover letter, came up with a title, and now to flesh out this random thing I suggested that they seem to like...Maybe just do something totally unrelated, then?Woohoo!Can't do worse than me! I thought about it before bed, contemplated it in the shower for 5 mins and...that's it. Congrats! That's huge. So hard to make it to the finish line.Multiple is OK, huh? Maybe that'll make what I want to do more kosher i.e. I'm thinking about including my 2/3 finished trilogy of books in the pitch I'm sending. My current publisher is unfortunately closing up shop, so I think all the rights revert back to me and maybe a completed novel/almost finished trilogy will stand a better chance than a concept, even if it's already been published elsewhere (the second and third haven't been, so...).Good luck!
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Thanks! I'm confident I can flesh something out (eventually), but I've got, like, 20 irons in the fire right now, so my brain is a bit stale. -_-Like Shoeless said, the mash works when coupled with a short overview. It doesn't have to be exact or anything. Just a 'feel'. Mine isn't literally The Talented Mr. Ripley x Stardust, just a charismatic sociopath navigating old world European mythology. If you throw out more details, maybe we can help you pinpoint some good options for the mash?It is fun, right? Good practice and you never know~I'd say just push the main story. At least that way you have stuff written already. Seems more tangible than what I've done and therefore a better chance.Dude, I have nothing ready. Nothing. I just made up a pitch that sounded fun to write on the spot. Go all in!
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Thank you! I know it's still an absolute long shot, but still very exciting (especially since you've had a good experience).Dystopia could be super fun! I could also see it being really popular, especially in this climate. And for mine, it's more like a serial killer dropped into Faerie and playing by a 3rd set of rules (not fae and certainly not normal human), but I thought it might be fun. Only problem is now I have to draft and outline/synopsis for this thing. @
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Perfect! What'd you go for? And even so, some support in publishing (if it's not traditional) seems like a fun chance. A real nail-biter, though. One of their editors is already going through scoping people to DM. @ If they don't bite on my serial killer in Faerie, I'll be devastated.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Heads up, everyone! Here's your chance~ Text for non-Twitter people (though you may want to get a Twitter just for this): "@RebellionPub Want your shot in publishing? For the next week, reply to this with a one-tweet pitch, and if it piques our editors' interest, they'll be in touch! "
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Thread How does Era feel about cryptids/paranormal?
I think it's really fun, and I love writing about ghosts, but even our haunted house when I was a kid could be explained by plenty of things. Still neat to speculate about. You never know!
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Thread What motivates people to have children?
^This.I have two children (3yr old and 1.5 yr old), and we've been to the US, England, Wales, Portugal, Singapore, Australia, Germany, and we'll be going to Japan later this year. I get to sleep in on the weekend (as does my husband on his turn), I get to have my personal time, my husband gyms 4x a week, I can go out any night if I want to (went to a comedy club this past Friday), I cook/eat whatever I fancy, etc. and I don't even have family to help me. This is all just us in a foreign country to boot. Kids require adjustment in your lives definitely, but you incorporate them, not end your own life. The limitations are only as tight as you make them.
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Thread "We’re in a new age of obesity. How did it happen? You’d be surprised" [Guardian Column]
I do think it's a matter of energy/willpower and just doing it in the end, but there also has been a concentrated effort to push sugar/selective campaigns on people plus the work-life issues. There's no perfect 'enemy' or solution really. But, even if a nationwide overhaul of everything nutrition and fitness was the answer, it's not going to happen (at least not in our lifetime) so people are just going to have to tackle the problem themselves on an individual level. Basically, people can hope for initiatives and push for better access/health/policies to combat the obesity crisis, but if they really want something done, they'll have to do it themselves. Personal responsibility by necessity, really. I just can't see anything ever happening on a large, meaningful scale.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
For the sleeping through meal times, sometimes you have to tickle their feet or nose to wake them up enough to latch. Once they get it, they're usually pretty good to go with "dream feeding." Just run your fingers lightly along the pads of his feet or on the cheek/nose to get his attention, then pop the boob in.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
I'd be curious too as they seem to be a new thing to me. I'm sure they've been around for ages, but only recently did I see one online. When they're done well, I don't think they can be anything BUT an asset. People like visuals, and if a moving synopsis of your book is paired to nice images and music, it's that much more exciting to general audiences. I've recently seen an uptick in book commercials on TV too. As for where you put them, I've seen them mostly on Twitter and FB pages, but I'd imagine any media or group where you're trying to introduce your book or get eyes is a good thing.The sale is a short term thing, but that person does book trailers as a job, so their site might be a good add to a Marketing section for what could be done with your book. Here's the main site: I've been chatting with her and she's going to add more themed trailers to the express option (like horror).I agree that everything's pretty much a crapshoot, but there's no denying that eye-catching presentation nets you more eyes than just slapping on a Paint cover and dropping it on Amazon. And at $50 (with the coupon), I think that's a pretty good deal for a bit of solid, professional Marketing. <--I suggested to her to make these kinds of things birthday/Christmas gift-oriented as well so if the price point is still too high or you're not entirely sold, it's an idea for your family/friends to get you as a gift. At any rate, it can't hurt, and I think it'd be pretty neat to see a mini-trailer for your book.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Heya! Just saw a neat thing on Twitter that people might be interested in for their books. There was a #writingcommunity discussion on promoting your stuff, and one for book trailers came up. This person makes trailers and is having a 50% off express trailers until July 30: The custom ones are quite pricey, but with the discount the express ones are totally in the treat range. Be kind of fun/maybe some incentive for finishing. If any other good/affordable trailer-makers come up, I'll add them. Might be a good resource for the OP, too.
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Thread Are you happy with your current weight?
107lbs @ 5'4" / 48.5kg @ 162cm I'm right in my sweet spot at the moment. Anywhere between 47-49kg is good for me. Could use more tummy toning now that I think my muscle wall has closed again post-baby finally, though.
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Thread What can realistically be done to solve the obesity crisis?
It can be affordable, but it takes planning. As other people have noted, veg goes off very quickly, and even if you're used to cooking all the time you'll end up binning stuff on occasion. The effort from planning, prepping, and then cooking (all after you've done a full day at work) can be quite daunting. But, I have two kids and on the days I work I still do the cooking and shopping after I do the 3 mile round trip walk dropping them off. It's a bit of a slog sometimes, but it is possible. You just trade food addiction for a caffeine addiction. :P
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Thread What can realistically be done to solve the obesity crisis?
I kind of want a challenge thread for this. We give you our tastiest recipes to try out and you make/eat them in a quest for flavor. I'm not a health nut, but I do cook from scratch every day, and I think I have some options for you that will make you happier in your food life. Also, major kudos for sticking with your plan and losing the weight. I know how hard that is.
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Thread At what age are the people around you getting pregnant?
34-40 seems to be the range of people I know (so I put 35+). I had my first at 34, then another at 36. I think 28-32 is a sweet spot in terms of kids, but it's hard to be a mom and get any kind of career going if you have kids right in the middle of prime time. That's why I think most women I know started later around 35.
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Thread Long-term relationship/Married Era: How happy are you in your relationship?
5 years married, two children. I'm pretty darned happy, but two small children will inevitably cause some stresses, so I put 4/5, but it's closer to a 4.75. Married life is what I hoped it would be and more. On some people finding issue with the 5/5 answers, plenty of people can be and are perfectly content. Having minor squabbles like dishes, etc. doesn't diminish from a 5/5 relationship.
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Thread the “dad bod” is the new six-pack, new survey reveals
I love/fully support my husband's gym habit, but I think it's understandable why the dad bod is attractive to many, and great for men's self confidence. Always room for more positivity, and feeling more relaxed/confident helps with fitness goals. Win-win.
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Thread Horror Fan Era: The Losers' Club
Yeah. I'd seen them (@RareHorror) through Gingernuts of Horror recently, and I saw a big surge in mentions of them on my feed, so I had a gander. It seems they often tweet artwork/horror-related crafts on their Twitter, but they don't say where they got them from. No link, no artist name, nothing. When asked, they said it's because it would come across like an ad...something they apparently charge for. This was in regards to a woman who does cross-stitch and had done a really cool one of Samara from The Ring. When someone asked where it was from (presumably because they were interested in buying one), the whole non-crediting thing came out and people tracked down the creator (an artist selling this stuff on Etsy) and told her. She joined Twitter to see what was going on and in DMs she thanked them for the exposure, but said that they should probably credit people moving forward. Not sure what came first, the DMs of that conversation coming out or @RealHorror being dicks about it when people started tweeting at them to credit stuff they posted, but it became something of a drubbing and @RealHorror took it to the next level and started slagging people off which culminated in them running a competition where they said only people who weren't following two other big horror sites could join bc it felt those sites were being mean to it over the artist thing. And then it apparently sent that message I put in my link to the artist this morning... They are currently losing followers in droves and it's blowing up again.
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Thread Samsung says users should scan their smart TVs for malware every few weeks
Seriously? Get me off this technology train. I already hate the constant console updating, computer snafus, 'subscription' programs instead of just being able to own stuff, and iphone BS. I want to go back to 2001. Give me back Windows XP!
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Thread The Shining sequel DOCTOR SLEEP teaser poster. Trailer drops today.
Very curious about how they're going to do this. Doctor Sleep read less like a horror movie and more like a paranormal mystery to me, so it'll be interesting how they frame it. Anyone who likes the look of this might also like the movie adaption of .
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Indifference. Callous and/or calculating indifference. For example, indifference to the suffering of others (some people see that as horrific, others admire it as cool practicality or 'eye on the prize' attitude). You could sprinkle all kinds of indifference around to varying degrees to really build up hate but also sell an angle that's attractive to some. Ignoring animals in pain, coworkers with issues, strangers in trouble, family in need, etc.
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Thread What's your calorie count looking like for the day?
Some days I only get a piece of toast in before dinner, but today I've had two bagels, a bowl of rice topped with at least 8 keftas (meatballs), a quarter of a pie, and 4 coffees. Dinner is pasta and probably wine. I'm 90% carb today. So, like, 5000? Obligatory thanks for the metabolism of a teenage boy (for as long as it lasts).
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Thread People who walk with their dogs unleashed
That's the 4th cow extravaganza since I moved here a year and half ago (that I know of), but sheep and chickens get chased out too. Two of those four were dog-related, and word from the locals is that a number of ones before I came were dog-incited. We have a real problem with people crossing fields when taking their dogs on walks and them going after cows or baby sheep during the lambing season. Had a few deaths (sheep) this year. :(
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Thread People who walk with their dogs unleashed
Unleashed dogs are responsible for the vast majority of cow escapes in my village. This was caused yesterday by an unleashed dog that incited a stampede that in turn totaled part of the fencing and sent the cows all over town.
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Thread How does Era feel about fanfic overall?
I think it's great practice, and great fun for budding writers. It's like writing with training wheels, and you have access to lots of feedback which helps greatly. I wrote a 50,000 word FF7 fanfic ~20(!) years ago, and it was a good experience and relevant to what I do now, so I'm all for it.
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Thread As Walmart turns to robots, it’s the human workers who feel like machines (WaPo)
My sister worked for 18 years at Walmart in the accounting office and they just laid everyone off to replace them with robots. It's been hard on her. She quite liked the "drudgery."
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Thread Ever thought you drank too much alcohol? How did you regulate consumption?
It just becomes habit, and while not necessarily a bad habit (as it's not binge drinking), it loses real treat status because it just becomes something you . Abstaining even a little will bring the charm and health back. I think cutting back so drastically might make it harder to permanently transition, imo, though. But the tea thing does work, I've found. You kind of have to make a 'moment' out of it (cozy tea with a book, etc.), but after your two dry days you're like, ooo, what will I have?I'm sorry, honest_ry. Is it the kid stuff you've mentioned before or just life? That seems like an awful lot for just pleasant pastime.Yup. Sometimes I'll have a small second glass of wine, but the 5 days/2 days seems to work well. Feels more like something to look forward to again rather than just a way to cool down after a long day.These kids are gonna take years before they stop crushing banana into the carpet, man.
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Thread Ever thought you drank too much alcohol? How did you regulate consumption?
I drink often but not much. I used to have a beer or glass of wine a night as my post-work treat, but I saw a news report on the drinking problem in Britain last year that said even just having only two 'dry days' a week made a huge difference in your health. I've never felt unhealthy or particularly concerned about my drinking, but it seemed like an easy way to 'be better', so that's what I do now. My dad was an alcoholic so I also figured it was a good step. Plus, taking two days off a week makes me enjoy it more the rest of the days too. If you're trying to cut back like that and find you're lacking a bit of willpower, just try the two dry day thing and sub in something else for your 'treat'. I try out different teas or maybe a small sweet on those nights. I'm not really bothered either way. With two young kids my liver had ample time to regrow during the pregnancies anyway. :P
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Thread How often do you all get a new phone? What is your current phone?
Almost never? It's been...12 years since I last got a new phone. I had a flip phone for years, then when I got married my husband insisted I take his old iphone. After that one got smashed a few years later, then I got his other hand-me-down. After this one becomes unusable I might go back to a flip phone if I can find one.
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Thread How did you save money on your wedding?
Save money: - Skip the flowers. Seriously. You don't need anything but a bouquet for the bride, , and leftover petals for the tables, and those you can do yourself. I made mine the bloody morning of the wedding. - Don't get sucked in by the whole dumb "wedding colors" thing. Do a classy black and white. Cheapest and still looks great. - Don't make the bridesmaids/grooms buy special outfits or shoes. With the B&W theme, everyone has a black dress/suit they can wear or borrow. - Do your own decorations, if any. I just rented a really pretty/classic-looking place and , then spread leftover flower petals on the tables around them. Boom. - Got any baker friends/family members? Ask them to do the cake. - 2nd hand wedding dress. I got mine at a 2nd hand store then fitted. () - iPod/digital playlist instead of a DJ (though we got a friend's friend to DJ for a much lower price that was fun) - Celebrant (one of my sister's coworkers had a license, so I 'paid' her with a bottle of champagne to do the quick ceremony part) - Hair/make-up. You can do your own or have a friend come over to do the ladies. Spend money: - Open bar/nice food plan for guests (if not doing a BBQ/potluck, which is also a great way to save money) - Photographer
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Thread One Piece |OT5| You can get through anything as long as you just SMILE
Man, I'd been a bit ho-hum on One Piece lately because the last arc/Wano hadn't really been delivering the Sanji stuff I'd wanted, but these last two chapters have been great. I guess I was just subconsciously bummed that Zoro wasn't in the mix. They really are more fun when they're on the same screen together. The boys are back, though! Woohoo!
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Thread Anyone else excited for the release of 'Good Omens' on May 31?
Adore the book, and I have no idea how they'll be able to pull it off, but hey ho, let's go!
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Thread You got that baby fever?
Who says you have to give it up? You take them with you. My three year old has probably been to more countries than most people on this board. And alternatively, take breaks with your partner or by yourself. I'm thinking Svalbard this year. :D
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Our friends did for ages, but their kid was a level 0 potato baby. Thing grubbed it (swaddle/ish) till almost 13 months. Congrats, btw!
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Thread Vacation Help: Where to go - South Africa (Cape Town) or South East Asia (Thailand / Indonesia or Vietnam / Cambodia)
Selfishly, I want you to do South Africa so that I can hear how it went since it's on my list. I've done South East Asia all over, and as others have said, it's great fun with amazing food, so you can't really go wrong. Consider Borneo, though! Amazing food, hiking (Mt. Kinabalu), and you could even do the orangutan sanctuary.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Wow. Thank you so much. Seriously. Getting reviews (especially written) can be such an uphill battle, and I know they're time consuming to write. Really appreciate it, and super happy you liked it! First books are always a bit embarrassing, and since this was my NaNo book it was even more by the seat of my pants. Hopefully book two will deliver even more. For Stickman, I think it's a great thing. That's a lot of care and planning to put into a book, and to get it out after that is also a huge accomplishment. I know a lot of people that have books percolating for years upon years that never quite get out the door. I can't wait to dig in. For Gingernuts, they've been really personable as you say, and it does seem like they're going to review it in June. I'll keep my fingers crossed until it actually happens, and then I'll panic because I'm sure they won't be as generous as my friends and family... I do have an interview with them coming up next week sometime I think (like yours), though, so the ball is starting to roll. Hopefully I can use the building steam from all the recent activity to launch the sequel. I'm aiming for Halloween. Naturally. :)If you do find someone cool, share! I love maps, and I might be in the market for one myself for another project.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Well, it's what I did during my attempt at NaNo anyway. I didn't finish either, but I did get get 37,000 done and it was enough to submit for consideration to a publisher, and they released it in chapters on their magazine while I finished up the book. It was a very educational experience, that's for sure. I'll be forever grateful to Cyan and everyone for helping nudge it along. Proof that NaNo pays off in all kinds of ways. \[-_-]/ And yay! Cheers. Let's just hope the advance press is 'good'. Haha. Anyway, what about you? Are you working on a 3rd horror novel or anything else in particular?
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Thread Author on book tour learns on-air that her work is premised on a misunderstanding
How unbelievably embarrassing. I think it's weird that no follow-up research on the subjects revealed that they were alive after "Death Recorded" which would have tipped her off to the term being something other than she thought it was, but good on her for handling it well.
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Thread Author on book tour learns on-air that her work is premised on a misunderstanding
Her options also included attacking the guy who pointed it out, downplaying it, pretending it didn't matter at all, being sullen or defensive, etc., etc., but she didn't, unlike many other people when confronted with embarrassing mistakes. I might not like her or her work, but I can admit she handled it in a classy way. That's not giving her a pass for bad research.
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Thread Cooking ERA - Let's share our best tips
Thanks! I was really happy to find a way to cook chicken that was reliable (and easy). It's always been the hardest meat for me to get right. As for brining, I haven't yet, actually. Too much effort when I'm trying to juggle work, kids, and house. :P You? Is it worth it?
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Thread Cooking ERA - Let's share our best tips
Easy perfect roast chicken: - Med/Small to Medium-sized chicken - Pat dry (thoroughly) - (Optional) Herb mix - put UNDER the skin of the breast if you're using any - Rub a little bit of olive oil over the whole chicken, then salt and pepper with gusto - Preheat oven to 220c (~425f) - Roast for 20-25mins depending on which side of small-medium your chicken lands on - Then turn oven down to 160c (320f) for 20mins - Let rest 8-10mins 9.5/10 times the chicken comes out perfectly (crispy skin, juicy inside) Bonus: - Buy seedless red or black grapes - Sprinkle in olive oil, then salt and pepper - Nestle in the pan alongside the chicken - Profit
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
You really know how to make a girl's day. <3 Thank you so much! Would love to know what you think when you get around to it.Wow! Super fast! Thanks again, Xagarath! We'll have to compare notes when we're done. Edit to add: I saw your interview on Gingernuts of Horror! That's one of the places I just put in to for a review. I had no idea you'd worked on Stickman for that long. Impressive.Awesome! Cheers for checking it out. Can't wait to see yours as well when the big day comes. For the cover concepts, that's great. I've heard/seen a lot of examples of cover art barely relating to the book, so I always wondered if they read it first or if the publisher just sent details for what they wanted. Irene's been with me since chapter one, so I wasn't worried about mine, but fingers crossed for you getting a good representative work. Sounds like they're on the right track, though. How exciting! ^r/HungryArtists is a great place to find/match with an artist. They post examples and (sometimes) their rates, so it's a lot easier than scouring the net. I got a commission from there.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Aww, I'm so glad it's caught your eye! Irene is an amazing artist and . Her illustrations really make it stand out. I have to clarify it's mostly novel with per chapter illustrations, though. She did some bonus art for it in addition to the chapter art ( which is in the release as well) but it's more light novel with art rather than full on graphic novel. The physical version does have the comic in it, though!
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Thread Jaime Oliver's restaurant chain falls into administration
Simple Baked Lasagna "An easy family favourite made with every fucking thing under the sun that only takes your entire afternoon to make. ” To be fair, it actually pretty tasty. Considering the time, effort, and ingredients, though, the name and the way he tries to frame it is absurd.I know. I'm just shaking my head at his propensity for promoting things as 'easy' or 'simple', your basic, everyday kitchen dish, but then he throws out recipes like that. If he approached it from a level-up your favorite dishes, or upgrade your cooking skills, then I'd be totally fine with it. He just goes on and on about his stuff being something for a quick midweek family meal or for your average layman, and they're just not.
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(21011229)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Same! It looks appropriately creepy. I'll need a good rainy night for this one, I think.Now I feel super old. Haha. I didn't play or anything, though. I just bought some of the periphery stuff because I liked the art/concept a lot. I read a ton of that vein of fantasy/sci-fi as a kid (Mercedes Lackey, etc. Bless her).
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
I never had any at all. I didn't even get any hints with #2 until my water broke and then the contractions started. It's nothing to worry about, and hearing what it was like for other women, I'm glad I didn't get any.
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(21012081)

Thread How much did you spend on your engagement ring?
I think mine was ~2k(?), but he custom designed it. He also went with a white sapphire (my birthstone) out of consideration for the issues with diamonds. It all depends on your fiances/feelings about the whole ring thing, but if you're game and can afford it, 1-2k seems like an average I see a lot (especially if you personalize it design-wise or choose alternative stones). Maybe do the style you found that you liked and other clear/white alternative stones (keeping it in the 1k range)?
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(20986724)

Thread Jaime Oliver's restaurant chain falls into administration
I think you've nailed it. He's a watered down version for either side. His "Simple Baked Lasagna" still cracks me up, though. Categorized as 'Not Too Tricky' it has 21 ingredients, 12 steps, and takes 3+ hours. This fucking guy. Hahaha.
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Thread Jaime Oliver's restaurant chain falls into administration
I feel you on that. I browse his site a lot looking for inspiration, but whenever I do a recipe of his it always comes out...a bit lacking. The comments on the recipes often (hilariously so) report the same experience too. Testament to whoever photos his food and designs the site, though. I keep coming back... -_-
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Thread Jaime Oliver's restaurant chain falls into administration
I was impressed with his focus on trying to help kids eat better. A lot of celebrities pay lip service to charities/causes, but he seems like he really put in some yards there, successful or not.
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(20949111)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Thanks, Xagarath! <3 I just checked out Amazon UK and they do have the print version (includes the comic). I hadn't actually know they'd added the physical version to Amazon! I've been a bit out of the loop since baby #2, so this is doubly good news. Gives me an excuse to post it on my media to get it warmed up again before the big review that's possibly coming. Thanks so much. And I could always use more horror on my Kindle as well, so should I go for a Stickman or a Lamp? :3Sounds like my kind of book! I loved Shadowrun as a kid too. I even had the Paranormal Animals of North America guide. Be sure to post progress stuff here so that we know when it comes out. I want to see the cover!
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(20918732)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
I dunno. A book deal with the publisher who's putting out the UK version of the freakin' Goblin Emperor sounds pretty good to me! And as a half-Irish/half-Mexican woman who likes cyber punk/fantasy, it's very relevant to my interests. It's a very Gibson-esque plot too (virtual reality superstars, AI constructs targeting each other hiring mercenaries, console jockeys, corporations, etc.), a favorite of mine. Were you inspired by Neuromancer/Idoru, etc.?
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(20891933)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Here's my current list of works:Novel w/ art Writer/Artist - / Genre: Mystery/Paranormal Thriller Publisher: / (sequel to Dead Endings) - Novel Writer/Artist - / Genre: Mystery/Paranormal Thriller Publisher: (currently serialized in Sparkler Magazine) Pancakes & Sex - Comic Writer/Artist - / Genre: Comedy Publisher: - Print bonus in the Dead Endings physical edition
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(20890559)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Thanks! I never really noticed it before, but I'm a bit of a Luddite at heart. Bells and whistles are mostly lost on me. And I will definitely do a post now with my stuff! Hoping to add some more to it this year, but I'll throw up what I have. Maybe it'll be up your alley. :)Haha. Well, good to know I'm not 100% oblivious. For the author links and stuff, let me check my folders. I think I still have all the notes from last OT. If they're not totally out of date, I could send you those if you wanted.You're a machine, zulu. A goddamned machine. :D
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Is that like a special page of posts...? A post? I'm old, weemadarthur. Hold me. EDIT: I have now seen the button. I never really noticed it before. Tell me some more of your dark magic.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
True! I've known people like that too. And don't be embarrassed. Or rather, be embarrassed with us! I'm pretty sure 96% of us are mortified (and still slightly proud all the same) of what we've produced, and especially embarrassed to promote/shill it. So please share your book! I think ours are (or will?) linked on the front page of the OT. They're out in the open, at any rate. :)
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(20862129)

Thread IGN: How Fans Translated The Great Ace Attorney When Capcom Couldn't
^This. What's financially feasible for a smaller company is not necessarily going to work for a larger one. It's nothing anyone wants to hear, but the hard numbers often say their time is better spent on different projects. A dedicated online presence doesn't always translate to consumer clout, unfortunately.
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(20862438)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Dean Klein's amazing ability to get his magnificent 2012 book reviewed in 2019 rekindled some motivation to get more reviews for my own old book (in prep for the sequel's release, at least), so I followed his example and talked to Sci-Fi & Scary and a few other horror sites, and it looks like I've got a shot at a review in June now. I can't wait to be eviscerated. Official reviews are scary stuff.I mean, I did see another Twitter account saying they had emails from him too, so maybe he's legit? It just seemed strange to go with an older book when he has newer ones out, and to claim all that Hollywood stuff when he didn't even manage an agent/publisher to put his books out (presumably). Like you, I'm enjoying it all just at face value too. People be delightfully crazy.Maybe he IS the genius he claims to be.Yeah, just briefly looking on Amazon after it all came out, it doesn't seem like he's sold any (his Seller Rank hasn't moved) but has many new bad reviews. I do love that a new copy of his book is selling for $135.99, though.:O
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(20826614)

Thread Twitter user to Vita Coco: "I would rather drink your social media persons piss than coconut water." Vita Coco:
Well done, social media person. Well done.
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Thread Canadian English teacher in Japan in hot water after phyiscally abusing young student
Well, that's going to do wonders for foreigner teachers in Japan and further work against men in the daycare field. Attributing a comment on the video spreading to being more concerned about the videos than the kids is a silly stretch, though. That guardian can care about both and only be quoted for the one.
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(20826364)

Thread Canadian English teacher in Japan in hot water after phyiscally abusing young student
Just saw the video. Jeez. That guy should not be working with kids if that's his threshold for frustration and how he reacts. How on earth did he think that was appropriate or allowed on any level?
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(20795666)

Thread Teenage girl kills herself 'after Instagram poll' in Malaysia
How terrible for her and her family. Social media is such a strange thing to me as an older person. As much good as it does getting the word out about various terrible things, people seem to invest so much into it emotionally. Cyber bullying laws are a step in the right direction, but I wonder if in the future it'll be classified as something like cigarettes or alcohol (18+-ish territory) since it seems to be having a huge effect on the mental health of kids.
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(20795975)

Thread Teenage girl kills herself 'after Instagram poll' in Malaysia
Yup. I'll be 38 this year and I find the level of attachment/investment in these things bizarre. I enjoy using Twitter and FB to keep connected and post mediocre pictures of my food, but my 'self' exists outside of them and I'm not greatly bothered by bad comments or posts. It seems quite different for younger folks who've made it an integral part of their personality/self worth. It sounds a bit draconian, but maybe it should be treated as a restricted thing till you're older. I feel like it might be too late for that, though, since it's everywhere now. I'm a bit worried for my daughters on this stuff, I won't lie.
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(20800036)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
I do wish people wouldn't review bomb him, though. He sounds like a total prat, but talk about that or read his book and judge it properly. If he's that much of a windbag I'm sure it'll come through in his writing. It was a very entertaining exchange, though. Kind of like when that author popped on GAF before to defend himself in a thread trashing his book. EDIT to add: Why is this suddenly popping up now? This book was published in 2012. With the weird dates, maybe it's a joke or someone submitted pretending to be him? It's kind of weird to submit a book from so long ago to be reviewed now, and the puffed up persona when it was published on Create Space (i.e. he self-published).
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(20799578)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
I was put off by the jumbled order of information and screenshots at first, but...yep. That's a Jesus effin' Christ from me too. Even his blurb is amazing. Here's just a snippet: "Hell's Shadows (one of three high-concept works of eerie fiction by this author) is a wild story of the most haunted house of all time, a house so dangerous that nearly an entire police force is wiped out by the creatures within it. And even that is not the worst of it. An utterly entertaining, immensely spooky and distinctly complex tale, Hell's Shadows takes the genre to an entirely new level of sophistication. And though set in modern time, the evil in motion today began almost two centuries ago. " Not light on praising himself, is he?
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(20796096)

Thread Did you a get a prenup? Would you consider one if you marry or remarry?
Nope. No prenup here. Never even thought about it since my husband and I were on pretty even footing when we married and are pretty fair people. When my books sell gazillions I'll probably be kicking myself, though.
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(20763650)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Just drafted my idea for the contest, and I'll bang it out tonight to see if it works. Hope to see a few more in here give it a go!No problem! I thought it might motivate people (myself included) to try something different, put yourself out there/submit something, and complete something for a change. A lot of us are writing/editing books or vague projects and it's easy to just plod around in the mire, inching forward. A short project with a deadline and a carrot at the end might be just the thing!That's why this little submission is great! Super short, might get you out of your comfort zone and open new doors creatively speaking, all with a much, much higher chance of being published than almost anything else. No doubt they'll get at least 100 submissions, but of those could be yours, and that's not a bad place to be for only 1000-2500 words. If you win, you better promise to own up to it! :)
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(20697595)

Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Heya! Long time no write, and heads up for a potential mini-writing challenge with the chance of being 'published' if anyone's interested. As I posted in the Discord, it's for the Magnus Archives (horror podcast), and it's a short story submission with the theme "Urban Legends." If you get picked, they'll read your story on the show with all the production bells and whistles. They're a really, really good podcast with great VA and lots of eyes. Seems like an easy challenge (1000-2500 words) for anyone looking to rev their creative engine too. Think I'm going to give it a go, but thought I'd share it here too.
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(20679480)

Thread Author takes picture of transit employee eating their breakfast and reports them.
Damn. Chanda let her have it. Didn't know she had a Twitter. She's never not been one to not call that kind of stuff out, though.
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(20613357)

Thread Vox: "How modern parenting culture is driving the anti-vaccination movement."
But doctors also give you conflicting advice on everything else, and you are bombarded constantly from the moment you give birth with deadly parenting pitfalls x1000 (many of which are contradicted by the same professionals depending on where you go), and what you end up with is a mix of confusion and fear of everything and anything that can harm your kid as well as having no clear idea what's 'best'. That's why you have moms polling each other and their parents with almost as much weight as doctors. And this incessant internet searching for answers. I think that in such a culture of oversaturation of information, fear of doing anything wrong because everything keeps getting overuled from year to year (Swaddle! Don't swaddle! Cosleep! Don't cosleep! Put them on their bellies in the crib! Don't put them on their bellies!), and scrutiny/judging from everybody and their mother on your parenting that a lot of moms are distrustful of 'official' information and are honestly trying to do what' they think is 'best' for their kids. I'm not saying I agree, and I think we've plenty of hard proof that vaccines are best, but that's the way it is right now.Thank you. It is seriously the most grindy, frustrating, and seemingly also underappreciated work I have ever seen/experienced. If you also want/have (had?) a career it can be very demoralizing/unfulfilling. 'Mommy Bloggers' are doing it to keep sane, offer other moms help/support, and feel like they have something else to offer besides wiping peanut butter off the walls for the millionth time. More power to them.
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(20606619)

Thread Vox: "How modern parenting culture is driving the anti-vaccination movement."
Like Septimus Prime said, you're absolutely bombarded by information these days and even the stuff from healthcare professionals and doctors contradict each other. I have two young children and I was given polar opposite instructions for both of them on things like swaddling, feeding, sleeping, allergies, etc. You do basically have to search around and poll people you know (friends, your parents, doctors/nurses, etc.) to decide what's 'best'. And yes, you are often told "you know your child best" and to judge based on that. At the moment, fear around vaccines is rampant online and in mom circles. I've been asked dozens of times by perfectly normal moms if I was going to opt out of the 'dreaded' MMR vaccine. It's not just a crazy anti-vaxxer feeling, and being condescending or aggressive like some of the sentiments here isn't going to do anything but make them dig in their heels. The need to make this a serious national campaign and remind (and assure) people that vaccines are necessary and safe.
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(20575060)

Thread Kiseki/Trails Community|OT|Familiar faces~, Zemurian places—SPOILERTAGS OR DIE!
Yes, keep them coming!
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(20538962)

Thread Last night's Game of Thrones episode is the lowest rated episode on iMDB in series history
I can see why. Episode one left me eh, but 2 and 3 were great and pretty darn good, so I started to get tentatively excited and then...episode 4. It felt like a concentrated effort to ruin all the good will they'd just built up. What the heck.
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(20538718)

Thread Does anyone here have stories of meeting a celeb(film or t.v actor or singer
I kind of got set up on a lunch date with Brian Tee once. We were both single at the time and I think our mutual friends thought we might hit it off. Really nice guy, but we didn't have any chemistry. Not too much else of note. My friend ran into Aaron Sanchez at a bar once and got to have drinks with him all night. Super jealous.
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(20436248)

Thread Do you think a new Fable from Playground at e3 perhaps? maybe with Molyneux involved
Don't go breakin' my heart.
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(20333835)

Thread So... how do I START writing a book? (Several questions inside)
Everyone's pretty much covered everything except for (National Novel Writing Month)! You can start planning out your story now, and come Nov you write. One month of pure writing. A tangible goal and a deadline. That's what worked for me.
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(20308260)

Thread Let's Talk About Skin Care
Thanks, Shizuka. My face lotion is 30SPF, so I thought I was covered, but pregnancy can make freckles/marks hella darker, so post kid 2 I've really started noticing them. Will give those things a try, but cursory look they seem pretty pricey. Better than just hoping for results from random stuff and wasting money, though. Cheers!
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(20307320)

Thread Let's Talk About Skin Care
Inspired to come visit from that 'toss your boozy lotion' thread... Does anyone have any recommendations for reducing the appearance of freckles/dark marks on your face? Someone had suggested some kind of skin whitener once, but when I looked it up it was illegal in the UK so I never bothered getting it. I did try Bio Oil once but never saw any kind of results.
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(20316307)

Thread Let’s throw your skincare products in the trash! (Because if they are scented, “scrubs,” or have alcohol, that’s where they belong)
All right. I've seen your glowing visage now. I'm convinced. I'll read your link and stop using my scrub, I guess.
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(20306690)

Thread Let’s throw your skincare products in the trash! (Because if they are scented, “scrubs,” or have alcohol, that’s where they belong)
I'd love to see this. I never know what to buy. I just use Oil of Olay and whatever random face scrub looks interesting. Probably the only thing I do right is drink 8 glasses of water a day. Tell me that's right. I need to be doing something right.
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(20306813)

Thread Let’s throw your skincare products in the trash! (Because if they are scented, “scrubs,” or have alcohol, that’s where they belong)
Seconded. C'mooon, Tabris.
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(20302758)

Thread A Brit's Guide to British Food (And what do you think of it?)
Sorry, OP. I've lived here for years, and the food (generally) seems a bit on the tragic side. It's so bland, and stodgy, and heavy. Not that I'd ever tout my own country as a good example either, but I think you have to grow up with this stuff to think fondly of it (overall). I voted "neutral" because they be done nicely (quality meats, fish, etc.), but generally they're just...not. And that's what people seem to eat and enjoy here. Come Dine With Me is not satire, apparently.
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(20270389)

Thread How many of you make your own home-made Pizza's, Burgers and Hot Dogs?
All the time. I'll make the dough for the pizza and buns, do my own patties for the burgers, make the sauce, ketchup, etc. The only thing I don't make from scratch is the hot dog meat itself. I'd love a sausage grinder for Christmas, though.
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(20214915)

Thread Rinsing your mouth out with water after brushing
That's a bit unfair. Toothpaste has always been put forward as something like 'tooth soap'. Use it to scrub and clean and then, like with soap in the shower, you rinse. In my experience, anyway. Seeing that note on my daughter's little dental pack is the first I've ever heard of leaving it on. No dentist has ever mentioned it to me.
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(20214591)

Thread Rinsing your mouth out with water after brushing
I've been rinsing my whole life and that's what I've been having my toddler do, but she recently came home with a brushing calendar from school that says in big letters "SPIT! DON'T RINSE!" I feel like my life is a lie now.
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(20101767)

Thread [OPEN SPOILERS] Game of Thrones S8 |Leak Discussion| We're in the ENDGRRM now . . . Almost.
Made sense to me. Possible last night on earth, guy you like, confidence, etc. Good for her~
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(5663131)

Thread sanji from One Piece is becoming the gohan of One Piece
I wish Oda would show off his fighting ability more, but his baking skills are going to take down a yonko, so I’ll take it. Even if he doesn’t get as much cool time as Zoro, he’ll always be my #1 after Drum Island. #TeamSanji
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(19895173)

Thread Would/Did you give you child your last name or your spouses last name?
We gave them my husband's last name. I've yet to change mine since it's such a pain, we keep moving, and my career is under this name. The only thing I'm worried about is all the passports. My eldest is Australian, my youngest is English, and I'm American. Without sharing the last name I worry for airport/immigration trouble eventually.
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(19857734)

Thread Michigan man sues parents for $86,000 for tossing his porn collection
If it was worth that much, couldn't he have sold it and not moved back in with his parents? I wonder if they' said it was a condition for living with them or something.
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(19857558)

Thread Have you ever done a water fast? For how long? How did it go?
Like OP I saw one of these articles (in a plane mag) and was always curious about it. I don't need to lose weight or anything, but the guy in the article saying the whites of his eyes cleared completely always stuck with me. Those that have done it, did that happen for you? Anything else?
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(19770176)

Thread My town is stranger than your town
I used to have ferrets as a kid and when we took them for walks they were incredibly erratic. I think it's just a ferret thing.It's not by state but by town. Give some examples from your town! Pics of alligators riding lawnmowers also appreciated.
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(19769967)

Thread My town is stranger than your town
Cheshire is rural but they're more like to be the ones robbed than be home to the robbers. This is Hunter boots country.Amazed they downgraded to life with that account, but if anything productive can come out of that mess good, I suppose. The juxtaposition make it kind of funny, though.Sounds both exciting and stressful. I'd love to try my luck there, though. :DWow. That's definitely something. Like, how could even the most uneducated person have thought the thing was human...? He pretty special, but does it mysteriously rain grass in your town? Indeed, and I've been there before (left two days? before Hurricane Katrina). I would certainly say it would beat out my town if anyone here was living there and shared some of the amazing stories (of which I know a great abundance and also delight in).Seems like common sense to me.I love stuff like this. To keep up traditions for so long is amazing.I did, and Japan before that, and Australia before here! It is funny to land so near a fellow this far out of the way of things. One of the baristas in Costa here knew my old company and a bunch of games I'd worked on, though. That was kind of weird too. :D Yessssssss...!This is a good tradition and I think it should be carried out everywhere.
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(19720778)

Thread Do you wish you worked in the game industry?
Hmmm. Tough call. The worst days, and the best days. Hard job, satisfying job. Dreamy and nightmare-ish sometimes. The most amazing people. Rife with opportunities, endlessly interesting, and frustrating to no end. I admit I'm enjoying this carefree PT role break away from being the conductor, though. But I do hope to return to full time soon in a proper development capacity. It just hurts so good. EDIT to add: 10+ year-er here
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(19676551)

Thread My town is stranger than your town
Will get to page 2 in a bit!Hmmm...I dunno. Seems they just painted it to look sinister. :DHa! I've seen that one. I've seen all of them if I'm honest. Cool about the movie stuff. Must make it more entertaining to go shopping.We actually all kind of just looked at each other awkwardly and had a nervous laugh. People who walk cats are weirdos, after all.Oooo, I like gruesome ones.I've been all over, so I do know plenty, actually. I've just never in such a wonderfully strange place as this.Tried looking this one up, but tons of things come up for it. Is it the plantation one?That sounds...special...Yesssssssss! The Hot Fuzz town! This is exactly what I was thinking, and yup, we're neighbors. Something about that was posted on the FB page, actually. Does seem a bit Wickerman-esque, eh? 'Peak' white people, indeed. :DC'mon, you can't just drop that without a picture.I think they could use you in Australia, TBH. You ever heard about the Emu War?That's...something special, all right.I think all cute birds drink free there, but I could be wrong. :)
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(19682289)

Thread Scamming the Scammer (The New Yorker): man chats for nearly two hours with FB message scammer
Ah, that was a fun read. I routinely get the same scam calling my phone ("We're calling to confirm the accident you were in."), and I used to just block them, but now I talk to them. I asked one lady who called if she felt ashamed of what she was doing, and to another I confirmed that I was in an accident, but that I will damn well drive my unicorn into whomever I please, thank you very much. It's now a lighthearted part of every month!
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(19675272)

Thread How Does One Motivate Themselves (To Have A Better Life)?
I'm not really familiar with screenwriting, but I can have a gander. :D Do you have an outline so I can see the arc/progression? Also, as suggested, there's lots of great advice/motivation to be had in the and a few screenwriters. Join us! It's definitely the place to be to get yourself moving on writing + you can prep for NaNoWriMo~
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(19647365)

Thread My town is stranger than your town
Since moving here (England), I've gotten to experience the village life up North, and I must say, it's been more than I could have ever hoped for. I went to the pub this weekend and... We had a rogue archer a few months ago: We routinely have escaped animals wandering up and down main street trying to go into schools, pubs, and back gardens: It even rained grass once. Can your town top mine?
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(19650765)

Thread My town is stranger than your town
That certainly does not sound as fun as hawks at a pub. There must at least be a haunted house in your area, surely.Go on...Right? They pair well with ale too, apparently.C'mon. You gotta at least post a pic.We need more info and pics on this.
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(19651802)

Thread My town is stranger than your town
The number of times we get cows, sheep, swans, and horses running amok here is highly entertaining. It's a fun change from the big city.Ooo, do tell.It's not all birds of prey at the bar here, but I'm enjoying myself immensely. Everyone's very friendly, and the local FB gossip page is endlessly entertaining. It's almost worth it just for that.Small town too, I take it? We had a prominent murder here two years ago(?). It was before my time, but a police man strangled his wife and dumped her in the local pond. It was quite the affair, apparently.Yes! This is what I like. No pics, though? In my previous town/village before this one (we were only there a few months), we took our cat out for a walk and ran into someone else taking their cat for a walk. It was quite humorous.
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(19592540)

Thread How Does One Motivate Themselves (To Have A Better Life)?
This part really stood out to me. You're so right, and it's inspiring to hear what you went through and how you escaped the cycle. I'll remember that for my own doldrum moments, and for others who are struggling. And thanks. <3 I had no idea anyone here even knew about my book except the Writing regulars. If OP ever wants to do a jam or a mini-write, I'd be game to help. I'm having a lot of fun in right now, and they might too~
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(19564864)

Thread Putting your photo on your resumé
I've only been asked to in Asia, but I did have several resumes come across my desk when I was a manager that had photos. And if they didn't, many linked to an online portfolio that had a photo. I don't think you need to or should have to, but if you've got a good headshot, why not get some mileage out of it by putting it with your online stuff. With LinkedIn it's always there, anyway. Personally, I liked seeing the people behind the info.
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(19508600)

Thread Most Half Assed Localization job you have seen?
He was very vocal about it, certainly. "ARF will assuredly be the most ambitious localization that Ignition has tackled to date, and I can guarantee that we won't allow another error-filled Lux-Pain scenario to unfold, nor will we leave the spoken dialog in Japanese with English subtitles. ARF will receive a full English localization, and we're sending a producer from our office to Japan to oversee the recording process. I absolutely love JRPGs, and I'll do everything in my power to ensure that we handle image epoch's game with care."
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(19473286)

Thread Most Half Assed Localization job you have seen?
For having no context for lines, no indication who was speaking, a cracked file system, and a hard deadline, I think they did pretty great, actually. ^_^
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(19455948)

Thread How Does One Motivate Themselves (To Have A Better Life)?
I just scrolled through some of this thread randomly and I feel compelled to say: You're really something else, Midramble. I admire what you're doing to help the OP. All the kudos~ Fellow HP, I think unplugging would be the best. It's numbing your brain and sapping what little motivation you have. I assign you 50 squats as penalty. I'll do them with you if you need the push.
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(19455642)

Thread Trip Advisor's 2019 Traveler's Choice Awards for best airlines released
Have you gotten to try the lounge at Changi? :D
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(19454732)

Thread Trip Advisor's 2019 Traveler's Choice Awards for best airlines released
Singapore Airlines is pretty darn good in all other respects, at least. Air New Zealand had nice coffee last time I flew with them, though.
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(19454554)

Thread Trip Advisor's 2019 Traveler's Choice Awards for best airlines released
Exactly. No one's flying First or Business for the cheese trolley. It's for a pocket of sanity on long haul flight.
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(19454120)

Thread 30+ Era, what do you do to keep learning, growing, and developing as a person?
I think about it a lot, but like others, I'm still in the 'have small children' survival phase. My second is almost 1.5 now, though, and I've started work again so I'm coming out of it, but if I have a 3rd I'll have to start all over again. I am working on several small personal projects, at least. And I've set reading goals. Maybe I'll get to refocus when I hit 40?
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(19399096)

Thread British pub chain bans mobiles, laptops and tablets from non-smoking areas
Yeah, I kinda feel the same. Kind of a timely topic as I went out with some other moms in town from my daughters' school on Fri, and we went to a Robinson's run pub (modernized/inviting decor) and there was a weird split in the bar area of people chatting (older) and a few groups of teens/younger people sitting around at the bar tables in silence on their phones. I don't know if banning phones/pads will change or help anything, but I definitely had an old folk's moment seeing that.
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(19303583)

Thread Michigan couple says ghost attacked their daughter, caught on cam
Neat! Can't wait to see the updates. I love this kind of stuff.
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(19270972)

Thread Michigan couple says ghost attacked their daughter, caught on cam
Right? If my baby was locked in a box with a cat, a honey badger, and a Wendigo and came out scratched, I'd still bet money on her having done it to herself.
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(19269912)

Thread Michigan couple says ghost attacked their daughter, caught on cam
Ghost...ok. Sure. I've got an open mind. Ghost scratching your baby? Is this your first rodeo, parents? Babies have nails like effin' velociraptors, and even when you clip them they just become even more razor sharp. Your baby is the second gunman on the grassy knoll.That's a travel cot. It's normal.
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(19252258)

Thread CNBC: Budget breakdown of a couple making 500K a year who still feels average.
Good on them for donating, but their food, clothes, and vacation budgets are out of this world. Amazing. And by amazing I mean horrifying.
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(19233567)

Thread If someone offered you a $100,000 after taxes in one lump sum payment to give up video gaming for 1 year, could you do it?
...Who wouldn't? You'd have a better debate with $1000 for a year and no games, or something harder to give up like the internet.
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(19182800)

Thread Love, Death + Robots Trailer - Netflix embraces the WTF
I'm watching Soul Sucker as we speak and...it's killing me. I like the animation style, I enjoy that kind of set-up, I'm but holy hell the dialogue, the jokes. It's like I'm reading my Wildstorm comic collection from the '90s.If you guys think it's worth a finish, I'll see it to the end, but did the dialogue/paint by numbers stereotypes not annoy you at all (in the first half(?))? Maybe it's building to the ending for some better use, but even the low hanging pussy joke in Soul Sucker didn't irritate me as much as this short.So then it all CG? That is what I'd heard, but I could totally see Eso's take on it because it was just that real-looking. The way he went up the stairs was uncanny. I could feel the weight on his hips, the way his jacket slithered about... Crazy.
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(19180577)

Thread Love, Death + Robots Trailer - Netflix embraces the WTF
Wow @ The Witness. That's a level of CG I've never seen before. The movement, the weight of the clothes, the people... Incredible. Hair always seems to be a struggle, though. Still, amazing visually and tight story. Finally! I also saw Suits and liked it. It wasn't anything original (everybody seems to love , but I'm a sucker for that kind of scenario (why I liked The Secret War as well). Dialogue was much more natural as was the feel overall, too.
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(19181557)

Thread Love, Death + Robots Trailer - Netflix embraces the WTF
Was it? I'd told my husband I was watching them and he was chatting about it with one of his coworkers and they said The Witness was something else because of how it was all CG. Just went off that. Didn't look it up myself. Still, what a cool technique.
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(19168301)

Thread Men who can do 40 push-ups are less 96% less at risk of cardiovascular (compared to 10).
I wonder what the threshold for women would be. Or maybe our health is measured in squats?
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(19168761)

Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Unfortunately, with foods these days I think it's rather easier than before to overfeed your kid. Especially with formula. My sister's first kid at just over 1 was 18th percentile in height...and 98th percentile in weight. Kid looked like the Michelin Man. Couldn't walk. Just kind of butterball-ed around. And you could say she was an outlier, but I've seen the other babies in my daughter's nursery. Many are, erm, large.
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(19170651)

Thread Would it be a hassle to have one of my friends crash my brother's wedding?
And? I never said they couldn't. I just said for family to exclude family is kind of missing the point of what is generally considered a family affair. They can do what they like. As you said, it's their wedding.
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(19170909)

Thread Would it be a hassle to have one of my friends crash my brother's wedding?
If they're family and they don't want my family coming, then...I won't? Not sure why you felt you needed the exclamation parts. I'm not demanding my children get to go, and I'm not really fussed about it. I just don't agree. Why bother to prioritize inviting family at all (as weddings generally do) if the affair is more about a particular kind of fun? A particular vision? I dunno. It just seems very strange to me.
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(19170509)

Thread Would it be a hassle to have one of my friends crash my brother's wedding?
For a family member's wedding I definitely don't think it's a good 'look'. A family wedding excluding some of the family seems to really be missing the point to me. For childless friends, it's up to them of course, but having no close family nearby we just can't go, and others with situations like Faiz's are in their own kind of bind.
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(19172647)

Thread Weddings are selfish. Prove me wrong
Sometimes, sometimes not. I had to pay for everything for my sister's wedding, while my other friend made the dresses and provided the shoes, jewelry, etc. It's not expected, certainly. There's also the matter of the bachelorette party, dinner, gifts, helping with the planning, etc. It can really add up, but declining based on the cost isn't uncommon, either. Most people are understanding and/or ask people they think are able to afford/dedicate that much time, though.
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(19172197)

Thread Weddings are selfish. Prove me wrong
More seriously, at least you didn't have to wear a hot pink barbie doll dress with 6-inch heels OR buy (not rent) a $300 teal bridesmaid dress and $50 shoes + fitting, OP. You got off light.
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(19168264)

Thread Would it be a hassle to have one of my friends crash my brother's wedding?
I'm glad you've decided to ask first. Weddings aren't like parties. You can't just show up with extras. It takes planning, costs money, and I'm hard pressed to think of a ruder (widely accepted thing) to do than that. And you already have +5 which is pretty crazy generous for this sort of thing.
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(19154314)

Thread Good Horror/Occult/Weird Tales Podcast Recs?
It was #2 about the dead Japanese dad and headless chicken, etc. It felt so aimless and seemed like they constantly corrected each other or contradicted themselves as if they'd barely looked at the material right before they sat down. I'm sure they get better as the podcast series continues, but it wasn't a great start.
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(19155209)

Thread Love, Death + Robots Trailer - Netflix embraces the WTF
As long as it doesn't end with her rolling in bed with a 'golden trophy' I guess it's not a total waste of time. I should probably give them more credit. Most of these have been pretty cool, actually. Just finished Shape-shifters. The marine looks eerily like a marine I dated a few years ago... Made for an interesting viewing.
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(19154457)

Thread Love, Death + Robots Trailer - Netflix embraces the WTF
Just to see the end of a monster fight? Not really. I'm more interested in the people side of things, and it just wasn't enough to keep me going. I've since moved on to some of the others. Is there more to it that warrants a second look? Three Robots - Very cute. Loved the Metronome-looking robot. Blindspot - Felt like it was written by a teenage Rob Liefeld. Very, erm, classic '90s?
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(19153454)

Thread Love, Death + Robots Trailer - Netflix embraces the WTF
Just finished another one... Good Hunting - Nice animation. Felt too short to really let it breathe, but was all right. Sonnie's Edge - Cool CG but poor writing, didn't finish. The Secret War - Really liked the concept/angle and the CG was great. Would love a bigger series on this one. Next up should be...?
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(19144216)

Thread Good Horror/Occult/Weird Tales Podcast Recs?
Tried Hometown Tales, , but only got 20 mins into one episode and couldn't keep going. The two hosts just amble about in circles like they only skimmed the titles of tabloid mags and can't even remember any of the details. They couldn't even keep the details straight of what they were discussing 10 secs earlier in the episode. Does it get any better? Had better luck with King Falls AM, . It's not scary, but it is charming and pretty funny in places. Wasn't sure if I'd enjoy the format, but Sammy has a really nice voice and the content is so wacky. Thanks~Oh, perfect! I'll check it out too!Keep a close 'ear' on the details. The story was very, very well planned, and so many things are connected. It's really fun to go back and re-listen and suddenly realize that the throwaway flavor text from ep. 000 relates to the fate of Bob in ep. xxx. Keep throwing out your thoughts too!
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(19139085)

Thread YouGov surveys 24 countries about their favorite cuisines, top and bottom are...
I did the same thing. I was like, "34" for Malaysians in regards to Thai food is dead low!Sure, but...what else is there? :D
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(19139007)

Thread YouGov surveys 24 countries about their favorite cuisines, top and bottom are...
Shocked British cuisine is so high up. Real toss up between that and German food for last thing I'd ever want to order. Peruvians got robbed.Heeheehee.
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(19110566)

Thread Love, Death + Robots Trailer - Netflix embraces the WTF
So saw this purely by chance. The first one that came up for me was Good Hunting. I was not expecting a The animation was generally very good, but the eyes were all kinds of off in the beginning. And I was expecting it , but it still made me very uncomfortable. Reminiscent of Aeon Flux stuff. Not sure if I like it. Sonnie's Edge I started but turned off halfway. The CG was pretty great for the monsters, but the writing was so heavy handed, all tell, and basic that it really annoyed me. Might try some of the others tonight.
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(19106826)

Thread The weirdest thing a co-worker has ever said or done
I found a smashed iphone in the freezer at work once. When I asked around, our accountant said that she had put it in there because it "was too loud." She didn't elaborate further.
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(19078324)

Thread Good Horror/Occult/Weird Tales Podcast Recs?
Hometown Tales sounds like it might be up my alley. Thanks, . Also, to get the most out of these horror podcasts, I highly recommend to everyone to take a genre breather every few episodes and listen to "." The absurd comedy of it is just the thing to really highlight the dread, I promise. You might pee yourself laughing, though. Fair warning.Huzzah! Can't wait to hear what you think as you get deeper in. It's a really rewarding series. Afterwards, The White Vault should definitely be next.I've heard about the SCP stuff, but never listened. It's definitely in that vein, though. Well worth your time (and Patreon-age).Right? 153 now! :D
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(19048803)

Thread France warns that it could block UK's Brexit extension request
So, uh, any other UKers got a list of things I should be stockpiling before the projected price/availability craziness? People in town are talking like there's a bloody hurricane coming or something.
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(19029135)

Thread Do you find your country's people to be more or less attractive than the global average? (Why are the Dutch so beautiful?)
It's all the bike riding they do. Healthy glow = +100 attractiveness points. We should all ride bikes.
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(19034051)

Thread Harvard researchers say soda and sports drinks increase risk of dying from heart disease and breast and colon cancers (especially sugary ones)
Did you have a few, or just one? I can see how that'd really add up either way. I used to have a beer a night just to 'unclench' (nothing too fancy or strong) almost every day because I have two young children (so I'm 'on call' 24-7) and work part-time, but then I saw a study on the news about how abstaining for even just two days makes a huge difference health-wise, so this year I cut back a bit. I still get my 'treat', just a little less. It's not that I felt badly about it, but never hurts to try and be a bit healthier when you're older. I can't say we're saving any money, though. We just get more expensive wine now!
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(19032043)

Thread Harvard researchers say soda and sports drinks increase risk of dying from heart disease and breast and colon cancers (especially sugary ones)
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
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(19034183)

Thread Good Horror/Occult/Weird Tales Podcast Recs?
Just finished Wolverine: The Long Night. Any other recs? Might try 's suggestion, but I'd personally like a touch more horror if anyone has any thoughts.
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(19038279)

Thread Good Horror/Occult/Weird Tales Podcast Recs?
Yep yep yep yep yep. Magnus is especially great because there are so damn many. I almost wept for joy when I found out how many episodes there were. When you find something that good, you don't want it to end.
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(18985659)

Thread What’s the most pain you’ve ever been in?
Natural childbirth - 8 hours of level 8-10 screaming and bleeding, after which you have said baby, then they stab you in the leg with a needle to congratulate you, and then stitch you up with only freeze spray for 'numbing' (it doesn't numb). Then they periodically come every couple of hours (no sleep for you!) by to 'knead' your abdomen to check for any remaining placenta in the most aggressively painful way. Through all this, you get...aspirin.
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(18986176)

Thread Are Europeans more stylish?
Maybe on the mainland, but I've been living in the UK for 3 years now and they're not far off Americans. Can't say much because I definitely lower Cheshire's standards, though.
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(18985154)

Thread Are you ageing well?
I don't know, to be honest. Some days I think I look pretty all right for near 40, and then other days I catch a glimpse of myself in a car window and think no amount of sleep is going to fix this. At least I still have the metabolism of a 16 year old boy.
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(18969839)

Thread How do you feel about post timeskip One Piece?
I don't like Sanji's new facial hair. :( He's my favorite character, and I was thrilled he'd get a whole arc to himself, but he didn't get a good fight out of it at all. Saving the day by cooking was fine, but I wanted a nice bloody fight too. And his new 'ability' looks so lame... Bring back my Sanji from Drum Island! Usopp looks great, though. Also, there are just way too many characters running around each arc now. Dressrosa was a slog even though I thought Doflamingo pretty interesting. It's been really hit of miss for me lately.
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(18951723)

Thread Pet semetary (2019) review thread - 86% rotten tomatoes, shockingly good!
I burst into tears just seeing those Save the Children commercials now. I'd never make it through the movie in one piece. :(
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(18940873)

Thread Pet semetary (2019) review thread- 100% rotten tomatoes, shockingly good!
I want to watch it, but I just can't now. Damn kids. Happy to hear it's doing well, though.
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(18872175)

Thread Good Horror/Occult/Weird Tales Podcast Recs?
Do yourself a favor and check out the Magnus Archives and The White Vault if you haven't already. I'm dying for something similar to these two (if anyone has any thoughts). They're brilliant.
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(18872061)

Thread Good Horror/Occult/Weird Tales Podcast Recs?
Bizarre several months bump because I was searching for the exact same thing you are here and your thread popped up. I noticed that you didn't get any recommendations and haven't got a certain gem on your list, so here's one for you: while the chance is small that you haven't since been recommended it, I highly suggest the Magnus Archives. Fantastic stuff, right up your alley. The No Sleep podcast is also good for standalone stuff. Loved the White Vault, btw!
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(9906387)

Thread What's The Most Humiltating Thing That Has Ever Happened To You?
I went to Ireland with a friend to visit some distant relations for the first time, but I'd neglected to do my research and didn't realize that the money exchange would be closed by the time our ferry got in. With only change in our pockets, we tried calling the 80 year old aunt we were to be staying with, but she didn't answer so a bus driver took pity on us and dropped us at the address we thought was correct (there were about 20 variations of "Deer Park ___" to choose from). No one answered the door, it was getting very late, and had started to snow. After walking for hours trying to wait out the daylight, we returned to the house we thought was right and broke into the yard and then greenhouse for shelter. There were two small dogs 'guarding' the place which we stuffed under our shirts for warmth. My friend then lay between some potted plants and I piled all of our travel clothes on her to keep her warm. I paced back and forth with the dog until it hit 6, then knocked on the greenhouse door that connected to the house until someone noticed. An old woman eventually opened the door. She said, "Oh my." Nearly 20 years later I'm still the laughing stock of our overseas cousins. tl;dr - Idiot American teenager goes to Ireland for family visit during snowstorm, ends up in random greenhouse with dog under shirt.
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(18796560)

Thread Unhappy Wife/Mother Syndrome
That's quite the sit, OP. As a mother of two, I feel for you both going through this. I don't have any advice with the PPD applicable to your exact situation (though I know many women and husbands struggling with it), but I just wanted to say that you've been handling it all extremely well. I really applaud the care, patience, and consideration you're giving your wife even though this must be exhausting and frustrating (and sad), and especially the care you take for yourself and children by staying social and giving them love. It's so easy to just let things go or neglect them when you're overwhelmed with stuff like this. You're doing an amazing job.Don't take it too much as a given. My sister is like that and we were all on tenterhooks with her first baby, but she's managed just fine. It's something to keep an eye on if the emotional roller coaster keeps on or dips for too long, but don't make a decision against kids purely based on that worry. Just talk about it beforehand, have a plan in place, and be prepared.This and the missing development/struggle from being with someone since school sound like potential causes of OP's problem. Like pets, or material things, some people think babies will change them or give them that sympathy and attention they crave. Or that the pregnancy somehow will erase or overshadow anything they feel guilty about, kind of like how everyone's supposed to be nice to you on your birthday regardless of anything else. Except eventually you have the baby and more responsibility and you're stuck with it... Whatever it is, I think you're 1000% right to nix talk of another baby for a few years, OP. She needs to get sorted first and decide to have one for the right reasons.
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(18797381)

Thread I got into an argument with my wife over something trivial
It's not the best investment and maybe she knows this after the service she got, but she's making an effort to learn how to drive instead of waiting longer and you're being a dick about it. If you wanted to get a point across about the money, being sneery is probably the worst way to do it. I'd be pissed and I agree with you that it's dumb.
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(18760481)

Thread Is there any living author who can be considered a GOAT?
Fair enough. Heall about writing for the mainstream and quick, easy consumption. I just disagree that it completely disqualifies him. There's just something special about what he manages to catch in a bottle almost every time he puts out a book, which I think is really important to deciding 'greatness'. I understand what you're saying about him versus authors that change/make an impact on humanity itself, though. But...he did make more humans fear clowns than any other!Sure, there are better comparing 1-on-1, but it's that consistent ability to scratch an itch (fear, nostalgia, bittersweet...) that makes him better than any of them, in my opinion. Happy to hear of any you know that have put out a large number of works that hit more notes than just their genre, though.
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(18725065)

Thread if professionals can use email, document sharing, video conference etc., why do we still waste our time with in-person meetings?
Face to face is way better in my experience. People either zone out, don't read, or don't process/retain online stuff half as well as a face to face conversation. Every time I see one of those flashy ads showing 'modern' business life via Skype or whatever with bright eyed, well dressed people using animated presentations, interactive boards, all laughing and interacting seamlessly through computer screens, I can't help but roll my eyes. Online has been great for a lot of things, and it amazing, but the reality is things just get lost in communication, people don't fully engage when it comes to screens, and technology isn't consistent enough to replicate face to face (Is everyone on the call? Hello? Hello? Can everyone hear me? Can someone message Bob? Hello? Is there a lag? Hello...).
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(18726104)

Thread if professionals can use email, document sharing, video conference etc., why do we still waste our time with in-person meetings?
Better than Bob in a Skype meeting with porn on in another window? :D
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(18709752)

Thread A woman was trying to take a selfie with a jaguar when it attacked her, authorities say
At least the animal won't be punished for her stupidity this time. Insanity.
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(18712049)

Thread Is there any living author who can be considered a GOAT?
Stand By Me, The Shawshank Redemption , Carrie, Cujo, Pet Semetary, Salem's Lot, The Shining, Misery, Dolores Claiborne...fast food? C'mon. Yeah, not everything of his is brilliant or ties up neatly, but those are memorable. Great, even.
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(18711559)

Thread Is there any living author who can be considered a GOAT?
Haha. I don't disagree with you exactly, but I don't think he's striving for perfection, just...enjoyment? Readability? Interesting things that evoke some kind of feeling in the reader be it horror or discomfort or macabre fascination, etc. And that he does excel at and delivers time and time again.
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(18711258)

Thread Is there any living author who can be considered a GOAT?
Stephen King and Neil Gaiman get my vote. Say what you want about King, but he's a master at his craft. Definitely someone I think is in the running for greatest of all time in popular fiction.
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(18645614)

Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Never seen that book, but my aunt got this one for my daughter and it's kind of a kiddie version of Where's Waldo: There's hidden stuff all over the place in this one. Maybe there's a version for your area? She likes it so much (and I like looking for the stuff too) that I might have to get Where's Waldo now.
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(18642425)

Thread I just wasted 2,300 dollars
Sorry, OP. That sounds painful and especially hard with disappointed kids. Hope you're able to salvage something out of it.Some countries require VISAs, and if OP was traveling without their partner, proof that they're a legit parent and/or written permission from the other partner to take them over borders.
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(18624902)

Thread Attractive person, now older, still attractive. Why is this news?
She looks fantastic. Nothing wrong with a fluff piece to lighten up the gloom these days. Makes me feel guilty I don't work out more and chug water, though. We need an old people thread for good living/good looking.
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(18479815)

Thread Dear world, shoes on or off in the house?
That was just my experience, but I lived in CT, NM, AZ, CA, GA, NY and VA when I was in the States and the only place I knew where you had to take shoes off at a rich friend's house because they had cream carpets. I also lived abroad quite a bit as a kid and it wasn't until Japan that I ever encountered the shoes off as a rule. Didn't see what other US people said, but have they been similar to your experience or mine?
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(18478460)

Thread Dear world, shoes on or off in the house?
I'm originally from the states. Taking off your shoes indoors is, as I'm sure you've heard, not a thing unless you have white carpets or nice flooring, which we certainly didn't. You don't think about that kid of stuff when you're younger, so it wasn't until living it in Japan after college that I got to experience why it was better.
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(18457262)

Thread Dark chocolate or milk chocolate? [Poll]
I don't like sweet things much to begin with, and milk chocolate is just so sugary and bland that it feels like a waste of existence which adds to my revulsion of it. Don't know why I feel so strongly about it in particular (there are plenty of other bigger offenders, I'm sure), but it actually makes my lip curl when I see it on things. Weird, I know.
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(18455943)

Thread Dark chocolate or milk chocolate? [Poll]
I hate milk chocolate more than any other food. I'd rather eat natto with overcooked liver on burnt spaghetti noodles. , unsauced, burnt noodles.
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(18453662)

Thread Dear world, shoes on or off in the house?
After living in Japan I can't go back. The idea of wearing shoes in the house, unnecessarily tracking mud/dirt/whatever all over, just seems alien now.
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(18422082)

Thread Beards in professional settings: Yes or no?
Is this really still even a thing? As long as you actually trim/wash/care for it, I've never seen it to be a problem. My husband works for a life sciences company (real suit and tie kind of place) and he had a giant beard last year.
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(18105215)

Thread British schoolgirl that left to join ISIS in 2015 says she has no regrets but wants to return home to the UK
The misguided dreams told to her that she was doing something noble, fighting for her people, special, a heroine/bride of justice, probably. They sold her a fantasy that the young, inexperienced, lonely, impressionable and insecure find very attractive. All things that teenagers tend to have in some measure. And now she's living in squalor, married again and again to probable near strangers, having babies only to have them die in that same filth. It's horrible. Whatever you think of her, she's been reaping what she's sown.
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(18104237)

Thread British schoolgirl that left to join ISIS in 2015 says she has no regrets but wants to return home to the UK
I was sad to see this morning that she'd been stripped of her citizenship/return. Mercy would have been better, in my opinion. Heartlessness is supposed to be what the other side does. She was groomed/brainwashed as a child and to have her children raised in that environment only breeds more hate (if any of her children survive at this point...). I know it's exhausting to have to have to take the higher ground in the face of remorselessness/callousness that she's shown, but as a mother I feel particularly sick at the idea that more children will be lost to malnutrition, hate, or violence that didn't have to be. And part of me wonders if she's saying these things because not saying them would put her in even more danger. I don't know, and I understand their decision, but I wish it had ended better.
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(17951095)

Thread Married ERA, do you do Valentine's day?
My husband's not big on it, but I like to do a little something. Last two weeks have been brutal with a kids or kids home every damn day from daycare (when I'm working), though, so I got some really nice perfume and flowers. I made him a 'man bouquet' full of salty and sweet treats and got some super high quality cuts from the butchers to make him a nice dinner w/ some craft beers. Not a big deal, though. I don't feel the need to buy things. I usually just make stuff such as a dessert he likes or something special for dinner.
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(17950725)

Thread How much does height REALLY matter?
In my experience it's just one of many things people are looking at, and a good personality/sense of humor goes way further. My sister married a guy who's barely 5'0" and my husband is ~5'8". Don't get hung up on it and you'll find plenty of others who aren't either.
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(17699038)

Thread I need book recommendations for horror and science fiction.
As other have said, Stephen King is always good. Salem's Lot and Pet Sematary particularly. Are you into any specific kind of horror? Monster/ghosts/slasher/psychological/mystery/thriller, etc.?
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(17631533)

Thread LTTP: 10 Cloverfield Lane, really good except for [SPOILERS]
I liked the ending. Just having the crazy paranoid psycho be made it great. And as others have said, she has a proper arc. Extra kudos to Goodman for being .
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(17631041)

Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Start by looking forward to a very interesting, strange, and often funny experience! Haven't posted in ages, but as someone who had their second at the 'advanced' age of 36 maybe I can offer some advice/comfort on the geriatric pregnancy thing. First off, what asshole came up with that terminology? Nothing makes you feel more ready to have a kid than being labeled 'geriatric'. But fear not. What we lack in energy we make up in dark, inappropriate humor, especially when the birthing part comes. Health-wise, I won't lie, it was pretty draining. I don't know if it was age or it being the second, but I was wiped with #2. What did help, and might give you guys some confidence if you get to that point, are the things you can do to prep physically that made a big difference for me (and many others). Squats. Do squats. Do looooooots of squats. They don't just work the area that's going to take the brunt of the birth, they make the whole process easier and speed up recovery like no ones business. If you do nothing else exercise-wise, at the very least do squats. Kegels, sit-ups, stretching (yoga-type stuff), and keeping limber are also really great too. If your wife starts now, a good few months before the birth, I think you'll feel less nervous about the whole thing. Tests-wise, yeah, it's pretty stressful all the things they throw at you. Best you can do is remind yourself that they're just going through their own checklists and the odds are still very, very small. We did the same as you and kept mum until we got the results back from our tests, which made us feel silly after for worrying so much (over the tests, not the keeping mum part). :P Life-wise, it sounds like you're in a good place, so rejoice! One of the few advantages we have over younger parents to be is generally we're in slightly better position. While having a kid may feel bizarre after having everything to yourselves for so long, it's not that bad. Really. I had my first at 34, and I still get my free time, my alone time, I still play games, my husband still goes to the gym 4x a week and gets his private time, etc.*. Life doesn't end after a kid. It just adjusts. You guys'll figure it out.<--And that'll take time and poop. Don't think for a second any of us had a clue at first, so don't stress. *YMMV in the first 6 months Also, congrats to all the new parents! And best of luck, You're not alone in the eating stress area.
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Thread Email Prompts Man to Attend Stranger's Bachelor Party in Vermont
Sure, why not if time, money, and inclination all line up. When unexpected doors open, take them, I say. Opportunity, adventure, fun, etc. can be found all over the place when you take chances.
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Thread Twitter user GirlZiplocked asks for the open secrets of every industry.
Read as much of the ghost one as I could, and it's not a surprise, but I'll hold out hope for less 'trafficked' areas. :DIf only I could~ She does seem highly entertaining based on this.
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Thread Twitter user GirlZiplocked asks for the open secrets of every industry.
I was going to reveal gaming's dirty excel secret, but apparently I'm blocked by this person. I really do find Twitter mystifying sometimes.
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Thread Daycare is a scam
Here, OP. I'll make you feel better. My husband and I live in the UK. He's a dual citizen, but I'm American and our oldest daughter (almost 3yrs) is Australian. We have no family here, so no help. I did stay at home for kid #1 until she was 1.5, and for the current baby, but kid #2 just turned 1, so I'm putting both in nursery 3 full days a week so I can go back to work part-time. Just 3 days. Our bill for 2 children, 3 days/week: £638 per kid per month £638 x 2 = £1276/month = ~$1642/month £15,312 x 12 = ~ a year for day care And, as a VISA holder, we are not eligible for the 15hrs of free childcare that every 3 year old here is entitled to. Yay.
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Thread What is a subject matter you could deliver a 2 hour+ lecture on?
Video game localization Cooking 101 Japan Suikoden Mythology Adventuring 101 How to do VISA applications for multiple countries without putting your head through a table
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Thread Baby Shark hits 2 billion views, hits Hot 100, continues world domination doo doo doo doo doooooo
Oh, we started with LittleBabyBum too, then moved to Cocomelon. Stuff was a lifesaver back in the day. When I first saw LBB I was like, it's bad, it's so bad! And then I saw everything else on Youtube and suddenly appreciated that they cared enough to make reflective bus wheels. :D The real question though (for all parents!), is have you seen...this:I'm with I really, don't like Peppa Pig. If you truly love your child, have them watch Sarah and Duck. Or Hey Duggee.
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Thread Average Wedding Cost for 2018 Weddings: $44K
I love seeing cost breakdowns. It's interesting where the money/priorities are for different people. For ours: Venue: Location, food/drink package for 47 = ~$5000 Decor: $50 (venue was gorgeous so needed nothing and I bought materials to hand-make seating charts/photo wall, etc.) Dresses: $300 (second hand shop + fitting)(bridesmaids could wear whatever as long as it was black) Hair&Make-up: $200 DJ: $300 Photographer: $2,000 Officiant: Bottle of champagne (sister's coworker) Videographer: $0 Cake: $0 (aunt is a pastry chef/wedding cake maker) Entertainment: $0 Alcohol: Premium open bar included in venue package Invitation Cards: $1.50 per person? = $75 (I made ours + cost of mailing) Florist: $0 (I got leftovers from a florist and made my own bouquet/bridesmaid flowers and just scattered rose petals on the tables/cake) Limo: $0 -------------------------------------- Total: $8,000-ish? Honeymoon: $3,000? Wedding Rings: $300I cut down everything non-essential and just put the bulk of the money towards the venue package for food and drink and the photographer. There are so many things you don't need that are peddled as 'essentials' like flowers or bridesmaids stuff or limos, etc.
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Thread Baby Shark hits 2 billion views, hits Hot 100, continues world domination doo doo doo doo doooooo
Heard it on Cocomelon first. It's catchy, but the song that haunts me at night is still "Johnny, Johnny? Yes, Papa?" Kill me.
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Thread Average Wedding Cost for 2018 Weddings: $44K
Hmmm. A survey by a wedding business company makes the cynical part of me think they're trying to normalize the increase (up from $27,000, apparently), so that people think this is the new 'average' and are more comfortable spending bigger amounts. I do think the wedding industry is a scam in many ways, but nothing wrong with a wedding you want/can afford, especially if you have a big family or cultural factors. Have no regrets for my wedding, certainly (though mine was much, much cheaper than their 'average').
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Thread Researchers determine that anime fans are at the bottom of the high school social hierarchy
Yeah, it's a generalization, and an unfortunate one, but one that seems to pan out a lot. Not really seen or experienced anything on the bullying end, though. Yes, they're targets of mockery when they do stuff like run around the streets with swords, but I don't know if people just keeping a 10ft distance counts as bullying with the smell and general loudness/craziness. No one made fun of my manga or fantasy or chess stuff because I didn't wave them around. They were just hobbies that differed from the stuff other people liked so they never came up. No doubt others have experienced worse, but I never saw any during school, college, teaching, etc.It did seem (from my experience anyway) that it was the obsessiveness that spilled over into real life that drove most people away. I would agree that this tends to be the general divide. It's good fun online or at cons (adult life can be rather boring sometimes), but when you make it your whole life it starts to take on a Peter Pan feel.
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Thread Researchers determine that anime fans are at the bottom of the high school social hierarchy
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Thread Researchers determine that anime fans are at the bottom of the high school social hierarchy
I may or may not have bought a long black jacket with red lining and high collar because I may or may not have thought it made me look more mysterious like Tuxedo Mask. Maybe.
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Thread Researchers determine that anime fans are at the bottom of the high school social hierarchy
I was into anime AND in chess club. I also did soccer, lacrosse, and track, though, so I don't think I ever got shit for it. But I also didn't shout about it constantly or bring capes, masks, and ninja stars to school like some people... That's really it for why people view anime/manga so poorly, though. A lot of anime fans don't just watch it. They want to it. The bathing thing is an issue too. :/
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Thread Venice to tax 'daytrippers'.
I'm not sure this is the answer, but I'd be happy to pay a (another) fee as a visitor for Venice. The city gets wrecked and overrun by tourists all the time, and it's in dire need of restoration/shoring up which is extra extra expensive due to its age and situation. I went back in 2001(?) and it felt really depressing, a dirty shell of a city picked over by seagulls. :(
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Thread Netflix's Castlevania is a goddamned 10/10 masterpiece (mark your spoilers)
I think calling it a masterpiece is a bit much, but Season 2 did sell it to me. It was enjoyable and had some really great fights. Nearly dropped it in Season 1, though. Netflix is really enticing me back in lately with their animated shows. Watching Sirius the Jaegar now (vampire hunters).
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Thread Localization: At what point can we call out White Washing? (Anime, Games, etc.)
I object. "Butter up my pooper" would work better in the last bubble.
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Thread People in relationships, how often do you have sex?
Coming up on our 5 year anniversary this month. (I'm 37, he's 36) We live together and have two children (2.5 year old and the baby just turned 1) 1-3x per week? Kids aren't really a problem, but sometimes we just want to blob and before we realize it it's 11. Zzzzz...You'll get back into it, A. Just takes a bit of work and scheduling sometimes. Are you still in the no sleep schedule phase?
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Thread 14 Ib baby born in Texas hospital
I think the world record is 22lbs(?), but 15lbs is still crazy. When I gave birth to my second, the nurses here (UK) said 10lb+ was the new norm. I shudder to image it.
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Thread The $185 Wagyu Steak Sandwich
Right? It's a bit worrisome. If you're spending a stupid amount of money on something (especially something like this), it had better be good 99% of the time. Time will tell if it's actually worth splurging on. And it's a silly thing, I know, but the box is part of what sells it. Just on a cafeteria-like tray it isn't half as appealing. I'd want a souvenir, dammit!I don't think they're actually putting tonkatsu sauce on it. They're just breading/frying the meat.
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Thread The $185 Wagyu Steak Sandwich
For a place about to launch they're somewhat ghost-like online. The website's not set up, no Twitter account. Just a few pics on Instagram. Nice logo, but it seems a bit odd in this day and age.
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Thread The $185 Wagyu Steak Sandwich
Mmmm... I'm kind of with TTT. It's cool, but the way the beef bumps and ripples out of the cow shape with hints of red is a bit off-putting. Plus it's waaaaaay too much. I'd be sick before I got through all that.
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Thread Do you read books (or ebooks) anymore?
I used to read a ton, but it's been hard between kids and writing books to have the energy. I'd like to do the next book challenge in 2019 for my New Years Resolution, though. I feel like my brain is going to mush and my attention span is definitely shorter without investing myself properly in them.
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Thread Do people really sleep on the 24th and open presents the next morning?
Whaaat? I'm (half)Mexican and I've never heard of opening them on the eve. Who the heck would let (aka want) their kids up at midnight to open gifts and get all keyed up? The whole Santa thing was always incentive to get your ass in bed and go to sleep. Opening at night seems weird to me, especially if it's not even on the proper day.
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Thread What Food and alcohol you had, Christmas thread.
Started with champagne and homemade beetroot dip w/ goats cheese, pigs in a blanket, and baked Camembert with figs, then for dinner we made sugar glazed ham w/ sage and orange crispy potatoes, honeyed Chantenay carrots, and garlic-lemon brocolini. For dessert: rum custard tart w/ gingerbread crust
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Thread CNBC Presents Breakdown of Magical 25 Year Old that makes $100K A Year
I switched doing our shopping from Tesco/Morrissons/etc. to Aldi, and I plan my week. I get the first 5 days or so on Monday (my current record is £18)(:D), then whatever else we need on Friday. I make a lot of stuff from scratch, stretch my ingredients, and I have a pretty big repertoire. I think we eat really well (average week is stuff like roast thai chicken, Mongolian beef, ribs and chard, bacon and pea risotto, steak panzanella salad, etc.), and it covers dinners, lunch for my husband, and meals for the kids. The advantage I have is that I'm the one stuck on stay at home duties with the kid/baby, so I have the time to think about this stuff/do it. Not that any of my meals take a huge amount of time or effort, but it is my 'job' atm, so I don't have to work then come home and deal with this. Be happy to share some recipes if you're keen to cut down on your costs. I have a killer (and dead easy no effort) bread recipe!
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Thread Awkward wedding dilemma...
Yeah, this is my thought. The idea of excluding kids, especially blood-relation kids is very strange to me. We've had to turn down two wedding invites from fairly close friends because of it. Aside from just not being able to bring them, finding arrangements for them for parents who'd still like to go can also be quite difficult (and impossible for those of us living out of country/away from family). As for kids ruining weddings, I've been to many before and after having kids and I never felt bothered by them being around. I appreciate that others might not feel the same, but this pursuit of some kind of 'perfect' day seems a bit miserly(?) if it requires excluding family/people that care about you. Everyone can do what they like for their special day, of course, but I know mine wouldn't have felt as special if not all of my family were there.
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Thread so....I’m moving to Alaska for 8 months
I have no actual experience with Alaska, but I wanted to say how hella awesome that is! Congrats, and you are going to be bathing in natural wonder and sweet, sweet simplicity. I would recommend (based purely on Alaska's general isolation and weather) to pack with an eye on being stuck inside a lot. Perhaps time to pick up/invest in a new book or TV series pre-bought or DL-ed for the adventure? Or get supplies for a new personal project (art stuff, or cooking experiments or writing, etc.)?
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Thread CNBC Presents Breakdown of Magical 25 Year Old that makes $100K A Year
I mean, what Ikuu said, but I've also lived all over the place and never had a car. Mass trans, even places with poor mass trans like LA, can get you from A to B, but many people don't want to bother (as it is a bother comparatively).
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Thread CNBC Presents Breakdown of Magical 25 Year Old that makes $100K A Year
Yeah, they need to do a proper breakdown of someone who has real pressures and makes something more realistic. I do think there are kernels of good budgeting in there, though. Living with roommates is not what most people want, but it does save you money in lots of areas. Staying on a phone plan with your family instead of getting something with bells and whistles might seem lame, but that also saves tons. And if you don't have that option, there are plenty of plans $40 and under to get. But again, a lot of people think they need more when they really don't. This guy as their example is silly for multiple reasons, but I feel like people's expectations of what they should have has shifted a lot in recent years too and they're not realistic either.
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Thread CNBC Presents Breakdown of Magical 25 Year Old that makes $100K A Year
Just read the article, PXG. Those are his 'portions' of those services.
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Thread CNBC Presents Breakdown of Magical 25 Year Old that makes $100K A Year
I did see at the bottom of the article a link to their previous one (which I think we had a thread on) of a "34 year old who makes $150,000 and is excellent with money." My eyebrows climbed a bit thinking of their rosy life view that the average person is making $100,000 straight out of college then $150,000 on their next rung of life...
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Thread CNBC Presents Breakdown of Magical 25 Year Old that makes $100K A Year
Good on him. Makes a lot and is probably going to keep it that way by doing what a lot of other people won't and mitigate costs by living with roommates. Good age to do it. Since his parents let him, sticking with a family plan is good savings too. Impressed with the donations, but kind of horrified at the food budget. I do a week's worth of shopping for a family of four at ~£40 (£ 120 --> ~$150). His school situation is/has set him up pretty ideal, though, so he doesn't seem like a good poster boy for your average budgeting.Right? Kid must be snorting lobsters or something.I pay £10, but I should just make an effort and do the £5 plan.
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Thread How did you decide to have (or not have) kids?
Was completely anti-kid until I was 29 when after two years in a relationship with a guy I loved it started to make more sense. After a lot of thought I made up my mind and told him I wanted kids in my future. He was still anti-kid, though, so I ended the relationship because staying would have led to resentment on someone's side (having a kid, or not). I later reconnected with a guy I'd been friends with in Japan and after he came to the states for work and we clicked. We had a lot of frank discussions on what we wanted out of life and went for it even though we were 1000s of miles apart. That was about 7 years ago. We got married, moved to Australia and had a kid, then moved to England and had another. We'll be celebrating our 5th year anniversary in Jan and are considering a third kid. Things are pretty darn great, and kids have been tiring sometimes but also extremely rewarding for us and our relationship. I only wish I had met him sooner. Having kids 35+ is haaaaard. Also, you can still have your hobbies and time and life. My husband goes to the gym 4x a week, I disappear to a cafe or pub every weekend for hours to write, I've trained both our kid/baby to clock out at 7, so nighttime is adult time, etc., etc. YMMV, of course.Your kid is going to be taller than me before they hit 3 at that rate. (My 1 year old still fits in 3-6 month baby clothes...)
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Thread It's one week until Christmas, have you completed your shopping?
Yes...weirdly. This is the first year I haven't had to use the expensive ohgodohgodpleasemakeitontime delivery option on Amazon. I have one package arriving on the 24th, but hey, still gold. It's a strange feeling, this calmness. I'm even planning out my Christmas dinner/food shopping this week. I guess I made it. I'm an adult now.
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Thread Where are the couch co-op games!
A possibility for another day, perhaps (especially if you recommend it). I love puzzles, but I think my husband has had his fill of shooters atm.Might give it a go. I've already ordered Divinity, but the more options the better. Light fun for tired parents is probably going to work out better than super heavy story over the holiday break.
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Thread Malta or Gran Canaria experiences?
I'm wondering if anyone has visited either (or both) and what they thought of it, especially if it was during the winter months. Would love to hear some firsthand experiences or recommendations. I'm trying to plan a short getaway for a 5 year anniversary and it's pretty much between these two, but I've gone down the rabbit hole of AirBnB and it's a bit daunting to choose now...
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Thread Where are the couch co-op games!
Bumping to request recommendations for any PS4 2 player couch co-op in a fantasy setting like Dragon Age or Skyrim, etc. I know I'm asking for the moon probably. Was hoping Monster Hunter would have split-screen, but alas. :(
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Thread Ninja has some harsh words about Fortnite ‘rehab’ and parental responsibility
Yeah, I'm feeling a bit of both here. I do think a lot of parents are reluctant to say no to their kids these days and just give them things or give in to them to mollify them (not just for their own sake, though. A lot of parents are also trying very hard not to disrupt other people's lives when in public.), but the 'family' sit/technology is different too. I'd like to hear more from parents that find themselves in this predicament and what they've tried. I find it hard to believe they just threw up their hands and let their kids play endless hours a day like some people are suggesting.
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Thread Do you take it personally when someone unfriends you on social media?
Can't say I notice, but it does weird me out when I discover I'm blocked by someone I've never interacted with or have any connections with on Twitter. I'm assuming it's work stuff, I guess? I don't get it.
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Thread So I calculated that in the last 3.5 years I spent $30k on craft beer
I'll wait to be gifted one then. (hint hint) :) Right? It seems so small, but I think I've been mixing drinks and units here. The form was probably 5-6 drinks which convert to 14 units. Looking at it, a single drink a night doesn't seem like much as it doesn't do much, but it does add up. Seems a bit strict for social drinking, though. When people go out to socialize, they tend to have at least 3 drinks and that's on the conservative side. I'd imagine many blow their quota on one night out + a glass of midweek wine. Funny that, huh? Looks bad one way (on paper numbers of going over safe # of units/week) and not so bad the other (a single night out with friends + a single night with a bit of dinner wine).
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Thread So I calculated that in the last 3.5 years I spent $30k on craft beer
Not a fan of hoppy beers, but the pine aroma sounds intriguing for the first. The Stone Points Unknown I've actually been meaning to try after some of the reviews I've seen: "body odor, sweetness, chestnut, almond butter, sesame, ..." I'm sure you've had Allagash, but ever tried the Curieux? One of my favorites. I also recently had a guava milkshake IPA which was pretty special. Recommend it if yo haven't given it a go yet (Seadragon by Wander Beyond Brewing). Are Orvals really worth it? I've been curious but not had one yet. Not that I don't think there's a major drinking problem here, but I seem to recall the UK guidelines being rather strict (anything over 4-5(?)(5-6?) units per week was considered problematic on the sheet you have to fill out when registering at a GP. Like with OP, given that everyone seems to drink far far more, it feels like you do so much less even when it's probably still on the edge of being unhealthy. I imagine drinking 4-6 units a week probably seems like a lot to non-drinkers, but one beer a day, 4-5 days a week doesn't seem bad to me given there's no binge drinking or even drunkenness. I'm probably skewed, though.
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Thread So I calculated that in the last 3.5 years I spent $30k on craft beer
Any real standouts during it? I usually go to my local craft shop every Sunday and try something new. And I don't think I'll approach those numbers, but I feel you on the cost. This one (nice, but nothing exceptional) was £4.95 and they had new ones in for £7.50(!!!). An enjoyable, but increasingly expensive hobby.
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Thread TIL Goblin Slayer kinda is Japan's "50 Shades"...
I haven't seen the anime, so I can't really comment on the quality there, but the manga is well drawn, in my opinion. The fantasy tropes are generic, no bones there, but they're also comfort food for DnD types, and having read much farther in than you've gotten, I think the main character is actually really appealing. That single-minded grittiness and focus on practical adventuring is a nice change from the usual earnest/power of friendship blah protagonists you generally get. And I'll have to disagree with you on the shallow waifu bait MC thing given what I've seen. As I said in another thread on this, I think they actually have the kernels of believable reasons to be attracted to the guy. Usually I'd roll my eyes if 3+ girls were all shooting for the faceless MC, but somehow it's works here. Not disagreeing that he's in a contrived position with beautiful women all around him, but he is admirable and dedicated and his reserved air is attractive. It remains to be seen if what good elements there are in it will outweigh the other garbage, though.
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Thread Watched Interview With a Vampire for First Time (Aka what is this heteroerotic masterpiece of a mess
Amazing movie. Pretty much everyone was fantastic, but Dunst and Cruise were real standouts. Given the subject matter I thought it would be goofy as shit, but somehow Cruise sold it. He might be nutty, but damn the man can act.
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Thread Man, pancake syrup makes oatmeal really good (food combos)
Pancake syrup, nacho cheese from a jar on macaroni, taco in a bag... You guys should cross post some of these things with that recent weight thread for maximum horror. On topic, sriracha sauce is great on breakfast eggs.
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Thread Although the fitness craze is hot, Americans are getting fatter.
Cook at home and cut out the sugar/salt/portion crazy middle man. I'm 37, 105lbs and just off baby #2, and still eat whatever I want and drink whenever I want.
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Thread National Novel Writing Month 2018: Maybe something horrible won't happen half way through this year!
Yeah, I'm avoiding crime/mystery because of the research time suck, fascinating as it is. Fantasy is always super fun, though. You doing high fantasy or gritty fantasy? As for horror, it's not that it's unpopular exactly, just that it's niche compared to the other genres market-wise. I looked up the numbers the other day and it comes in last with a pretty significant gap between it and 4th place(*2017 stats). 3rd was a real surprise. Who would've thought religious/inspirational would be so high!
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Thread For those who read "Goblin Slayer" Manga: Who else think... [MAJOR SPOILERS so far]
Mmmm, I don't know if I'd go that far, OP, but it would certainly be more interesting than just the generic 'the gods are playing games' angle which is as basic as it comes. If that was the case, Goblin Slayer would have an even deeper motivation/despair (his loss and vendetta is all just for the amusement of gods) that would be welcome. Not sure they'll bother given the template they're following, but there certainly is groundwork for it anyway. I'd much prefer they focus on that and leave the goblins'/author's (or artist's perhaps?) fixation on brutalizing female characters to the wayside because I really like Goblin Slayer himself and the nitty gritty, almost procedural fantasy that it is sometimes. I love how expert he's become on something that's sneered at in most fantasy and the way it informs his character without losing the human element. He's emotionally on hold because of his past, but he's not a cretin or aggressively rude, and his frankness is endearing. For all the unnecessary focusing on rape, the main female characters are weirdly (given how every other woman on screen ends up) treated all right so far in their interest for him. They actually have believable reasons to be attracted to the guy. Usually I'd roll my eyes if 3+ girls were all shooting for the faceless MC, but somehow it's works here (atm anyway). Anyway, not sure I'll stick with it if it keeps up with the crap, but there are elements I like.
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Thread Suikoden series portal website relaunched
A bit, but Jeremy (Blaustein) has commented on it before, so it's no big secret. No labeling, no context, deadlines... The trifecta of major localization woes, basically. You can see why it had the trouble it did.
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Thread National Novel Writing Month 2018: Maybe something horrible won't happen half way through this year!
Not on board yet, but I've at least pared down the possibilities to two stories I've had rolling around in my head. Will have to do a bit of research first on commercial stuff, though. One gets the impression that horror is still not a particularly popular market these days. What genre is everyone else going for? True! If I can even write the skeleton of the plot that'll be something. It'll depend on how the October plotting goes, but I'll try and take your good words to heart. Cheers for them~
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Thread Need help with getting my cat to stop peeing outside the litter box.
Aside from what everyone else has suggested, have you tried a different kind of litter yet? Some cats are very sensitive to 'dusty' litters and will avoid them if they can. There are hypoallergenic crystal-type litter that has fixed pee-aversion cats that I know of. Also: How often do you clean your box? The cat might be avoiding an overloaded tray..
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Thread Pet Sematary trailer
*I've spoiler-tagged a bunch of stuff because it seems like some posters haven't seen the original or read the book and I don't want to ruin it for Creatchee or them (even though, yes, many spoilers have been posted. It's just in case.) No worries. And, yeah, once you have kids, fast traffic gives you horrible 'danger! danger!' signals right to your heart. Actually, everything grabs your heart in an icy fist if your children are under 18, I think. :D Absolutely. Yep. Even the trailer made me feel ill. :(
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Thread Pet Sematary trailer
You guys aren’t parents, are you? They’re not scared because they think it’s a spooky truck. They’re scared for their kids because the road is right up on them, the trees block most of the view so there’s barely any warning when traffic is going by until it’s on you, and that truck went barreling past. I’d clutch my toddler too if that was near my new place.
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Thread Is IGN objectifying women?
I'd like to hear her thoughts on it first. Does she feel pressured, does she get to pick her wardrobe, OK the thumbnails, get support/backup if trolls and idiots are bothering her, etc. If she's running the show and enjoys her work, though, more power to her.
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Thread Hey Era, say something nice about another member!
You are too kind, but in reality I'm 96% crotchety. My mom says I'm nice when I drink, though. And I would post more, but I need joke threads for that. Or a comic jam. Or maybe a Gen13 appreciation thread. If you build it, I will come? :) , etc., etc. (maybe that guy) all the Writing crew basically, are tops. and also the bee's knees.
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Thread National Novel Writing Month 2018: Maybe something horrible won't happen half way through this year!
Great job, Flowers! It's tempting me when it shouldn't. I'll use October to fantasize about it and plot and then decide at the 11th hour if I want to fall on my face in Nov. :D
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Thread Man's prank to sell girlfriend on eBay leads to $119K bid
I've been trying to make a proper pun/job posting for her to offer him as, but they all sound too back pages of Craigslist. She's at the least got leverage for several years of back rubs.
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Thread Beer and alcohol in a kid's birthday party?
Like Saganator said, a toddler without a parent is unheard of on both ends. Are you just thinking older kid parties? 8+ (too old?) I could see dropping the kids off, but younger than that sounds really irresponsible as a parent and a disaster waiting to happen. You do not subject anyone to a house full of toddlers by themselves. Nobody is getting drunk at these parties except maybe Uncle Bill who has no kids and came for the cake and shanties.
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Thread Beer and alcohol in a kid's birthday party?
I've never been to a kid's birthday party, but now knowing intimately how other parents are feeling and functioning, whenever I do start throwing them for my daughter I will absolutely have alcohol on offer. The bouncy house will be full of parents after an hour. Kidding?
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Thread Well I'm going to be a dad...again...
Congrats, yo~ Let us know how it goes in the parent thread. I've got a 2.5 year old and a 10 month old and in some insane part of my brain I'm considering a 3rd. Would definitely be keen to see how the experience is for you guys.
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Thread What if men had a curfew? [hypothetical thought exercise, not literal]
Ah, what a novel exercise. Makes you really think about all the random things you do before going out at night. Even now at 37 my husband stresses if I go out alone after sunset. When I did my study in Kyoto when I was 25 my host family put me under a curfew. I was not allowed to go out after 6PM because they were concerned for my safety. Can you imagine that as a grown woman? :P Aye~
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Mia just got invited to her first birthday party for a classmate at her nursery. This other kid's super mom has it all planned out, themed, and requested RSVPs a month+ ahead of time. For my part, I've never thrown my kid a party (in my defense she's only 2) and the message I just left on this other kid's mom's phone sounded like a serial killer. Experienced parents, what can I expect here? Gift pitfalls? Parental faux pas to watch out for? Should I drink before I go to better weather it?
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Thread I believe I may have kidney disease. Any of you dealt with it?
Have they done an ultrasound yet? If there are cysts and it's PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), I can tell you a bit about what to expect. My family holds some kind of world record for having it.
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Thread Halifax cartoonist’s response to Kavanaugh hearing goes viral (Warning: upsetting imagery)
It does (very bluntly) cut out all the noise and highlight the main issue while also making a wider commentary about the Republican party. I think it's a very effective political cartoon. Haven't had one resound with me so much in years. Shame it has to be such a horrible, wrenching situation. I miss the days when lampooning Dan Quayle was what drove political art.
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Thread The Dragon Prince |OT| The Last Frameratebender
Was it actually those soldiers that locked Gren up? I don't remember if Viren 'relieving' Gren of duty came the next day, and we didn't see what happened between Viren telling Gren to meet him and then Gren suddenly being in chains. I do totally agree that they sacrifice all impact or gravity of bad situations for dumb jokes. They had Amaya trust Gren, warn him explicitly, and then make it all pointless for a fruit gag. It's pretty lame.
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Thread The Dragon Prince |OT| The Last Frameratebender
Just finished it. Like others I gave it a shot based on TLA, and the design looked all right. But...mmmm. I didn't hate it, but felt really weak. So many plot/character issues, so many random writing decisions that left me scratching my head. Some things: - The character designs - Aunt Amaya (weapons grade breeeeeead) - Claudia and Soren (they didn't give them much to work with, but I still liked them)(Claudia's lack of squeamish-ness is great) - Family dynamics (step-son and dad-king w/ a happy relationship? Shocker.) - People behaving w/ common sense (Amaya not buying Viren's sincerity) - Viren's relationship with the king - Gren (dumb but pretty) - Forced humor (Many, many times, but that jerk-face dance...) - WTH moments (I can talk to animals! I'm a wolf with only 3 legs, but I can carry/run w/ lots of people on me! I'm a master tracker/badass with an anchor chain, but I'm stuck in a ditch!) - How Do I Storytelling: *His name is Bait! Bc he's bait! Oooo, giant fish trying to eat Bait to hammer home that bit of background we just spoon fed you. *Argument! Be flustered and leave bread! Looong, deliberate parting shot of bread, so specific that you wonder if the bread is some kind of undiscovered primal magic that Callum will need to defeat Viren someday. Oh, no food now? Yes! we can talk about the fact that elves and humans haven't really interacted much and have bad ideas about each other! Thanks, bread shot! - People behaving w/out any common sense (The priestess distrusts Viren and his actions so much she refuses to light the funeral pyre, but then is OK crowning him?) - It's an ultra dragon egg baby! It's weak, it's dying! It's hatched...a frolicking dragon puppy mascot thing...
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Thread When the Titanic sank, Women and Children boarded the lifeboats first
Children first for sure, and those that need assistance next. And a parent with the kid/kids at least, as well. For the rest I'd like to think we could just get on the boats in an orderly way. I'd probably insist on my husband going with the kids over me. He's bigger, stronger, and a better swimmer and would give my kids a greater chance to survive if he went with them. That's up to each parent set, though. Solid advice.
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Thread I'm 28, high paying job, no debt. Why should/shouldn't I move out of parent's place?
If you're happy and your parents are happy, then that's the crux of it, but the 20-30 block is a huge formative period, and I personally feel like you're missing out on developing in some really key areas if you stay at home. Living alone means you're free to do whatever in your own private space, even change that space. Moving into a place and setting it up with your things, eking out your own space/style/preferences in every corner is very different from your bedroom (is this your childhood bedroom as well?). It's your space to decorate and also your responsibility, and that responsibility is part of your development. Handling issues (damage, plumbing, wiring), taking care of upkeep, upgrading areas, being responsible for maintaining it (cleaning and such), are all valuable learning experiences. I'm sure you help at home, but that's not the same as being responsible fr your own place. Freedom to have people over, stay over, come in and out at all hours, blast music, etc. is stuff you can have when living with your parents...after you ask. Doing things without needing to ask permission, no matter how amiable your folks or generous their rules is not insignificant. It means you're not a kid any more (in that way), basically. It's a personal choice, and again, if you're content enough, do what you like, but I find it really strange how everyone seems so determined to avoid any hardship? risk? these days. The life experience you get from living alone isn't just about pluses (freedom, privacy, etc.), it's about being exposed to, well, life: paying bills, doing all your own cooking, shopping, managing your place, dealing with responsibilities and learning how to navigate shit. The biggest value in leaving your parents' place is the struggle, imo. I suppose it doesn't as appealing as buying a house at 30, but holy hell you learn a lot. On the flipside, you might end up starting late in dating, but you'll be well situated. That's very attractive to partners too. Not even in regards to sex? I mean, my husband's cousin lived with his mom till he was 28 and didn't feel a lick of embarrassment bringing home different women every week and having her see them off with a coffee in the morning, so maybe you're cool with that, but I'd be weirded out if a date/BF told me we'd have to potentially pass his Grandma on the way to knock booties (no boots, too much noise). I was a fair distance from a lot of my friends too, but having our own places meant we'd just take turns hosting dinner parties or movie nights or game stuff, and they'd all just crash overnight (and vice-versa). I think having your own place is great for social stuff, but you're right that it's not the end all be all if you guys are meeting up just fine as is. Towel definitely doesn't count. I'm an onsen lover too, but I'd never feel comfortable parading naked around the house with my parents or grandmother there, as you don't seem to either. Anyway, I doubt anyone thinks you're some lazy moocher. It sounds like you have a nice relationship and value that closeness plus it helps them out, so it's not like you've overstayed your welcome or anything. You can certainly carry on and it does seem very practical to continue to save while you can. I guess you just have to decide when you think the value of the experiences you might potentially be missing outweighs the benefits of the current situation. I'm sure you'll do fine either way you go, though. Good luck~
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Thread I'm 28, high paying job, no debt. Why should/shouldn't I move out of parent's place?
Freedom Life experience Dating Privacy Social life Relief for your parents Post-shower naked strolls through the living room while you skull a lager on a hot summer day
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Thread Most inappropriate thing you’ve said at work
She might have just meant that women's parts are used to imply weakness, cowardice, or some kind of fussy/whingey nature (Don't be a pussy, got sand in your vagina, etc.) whereas men's are used more for general jerkiness. Annoys me too.
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Thread Most inappropriate thing you’ve said at work
Rather then, I can't see people taking it seriously. For the context thing, though, if the entire premise of the thread is jokey, is context really needed? If I had just posted "I told my boss he was a bastard once and that I was going to knock him out," do I really need to add in the context that he'd routinely send me newspaper headlines of women driving into ponds? I don't think so because people can infer from the thread title and OP that it's not a serious threat and I didn't actually plan to hit him. Yes, the poster put it bluntly, but that's part of the delivery. I can appreciate maybe wanting to ask the poster for clarification, but it just seems obvious that it's a joke and not any kind of endorsement of violence against women.
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Thread Most inappropriate thing you’ve said at work
It's a thread about the jokey, idiotic, embarrassing mistakes, or vulgar banter between coworkers, not a confessional for behavior that would get you jailed. I can't imagine anyone taking that post any more seriously than my own post about retorting violence towards my boss. It's just about shock value/hyperbole, not specifically targeting women or men. If there's some wider problem in serious threads where people are dropping stuff like that without a hint of irony, then I could see your point, but the entire premise of the thread is inappropriate things.
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Thread Most inappropriate thing you’ve said at work
I mean, OP started off with orgasming to a strangled cow. The thread is about inappropriate stuff you've said at work (jokes, being vulgar, being an idiot, etc.), not stuff you meant or regret necessarily. I don't think anyone's being serious when they post their stuff, so not sure why his/hers was singled out. My boss used to jokingly tell me to get back in the kitchen or make him a sandwich and I'd retort with promises of death or say "May spiders eat your eyes" or something equally dumb. It's just banter.
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Thread Attn: everyone on the internet: YOU HAVE NO PRIVACY
Between what I research for work, play for my kids on youtube (endless Peter Gabriel for my dancing 2yr old), and my penchant for looking up whatever obscure random shit that crosses my mind, I imagine whoever is listening must be very confused. But, yes, it is still unsettling to know how in your business all these companies are. The only 'defense' is hoping you don't stand out, I suppose. Shoaling's not much of a comfort if you think about it too much, though. Someone always gets eaten~
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Thread What's the biggest example of "Treating Yourself"?
I used to like splurging on a tasting course meal at a nice restaurant once in a blue moon, but I don't really buy anything. Only recent thing I can think of that was purely to treat myself was Tolkien's Complete History of Middle Earth. If we ever get a house I'll splurge on a library room to put it. I want to see it!
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Thread Had any nightmares recently or just have a memorable one?
I have nightmares all the time. Usually they involve water, deep pools or lakes of water with giant things swimming in them. Or titanic waves approaching. Used to have a reoccurring one about a house where I could walk through the walls, but it got progressively harder each wall I went through. Every room had something horrible or dead or dying in it. Only once did I make it out, but something was waiting on the porch for me. C'est la décès~
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Thread Appealing a Twitter account suspension
It's not just a British/Australian thing. Darker humor/hyperbole is the banter style for many Americans, as well. I say that stuff all the time, though obviously you pick and choose your audience. I still hate "cunt," though. You can imagine how being married to one of you is quite the trial sometimes. Watching cricket with him is...special.
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Thread The Dumbest Moments From Comic Books
It's nothing on a Superman/Barda porno (seriously?!), but I remember when Knockout was hitting a 16(?) week old. That's amazing, but what's really got me scratching my head is what's going on with that right boot. Did he, like, have gout and have to get a peg? So many questions...
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Thread Teens are protesting in-class presentations
What person with severe anxiety would apply for a job with obvious presentation needs? The problem is most jobs don't exactly list that as a requirement, but many do have regular situations that would call for a presentation. For example, a few from my last 20 years that you wouldn't expect would need you to present in front of large groups (10+) all, but I did, and often. Horseback Trail Guide Simulation Mole Pizza Hut (I shit you not) Video Game Localization Comic Book Editor Restaurant Hostess
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Thread Teens are protesting in-class presentations
Yup. Exactly this. And while we've all been talking about the benefits that come from public speaking, there are also the benefits from failing at it. Presentation critiques like speaking louder, having better posture/body language, engaging your audience, organizing your points, etc. are all things that once you know you need to improve on and do can transfer to general life, not just presentations. Failing is good. Being scared every now and then is good. Being bad at things is an essential learning experiences. Seems like people are trying to remove all discomfort from school with stuff like this. It would be a huge mistake, in my opinion.
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Thread Are you reconsidering the 2 year upgrade cycle for a cell phone?
Wow. Those prices are crazy to me. Upgrade? Pay? I had a sweet no internet flip phone until 2015(?) and then I just used my husband's old work iphone until the screen became an impossible rainbow-streaked mess. Now I have his next old iphone where the home button doesn't work. When this one breaks I'll probably bang two rocks together and call it a day.
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Thread America's Obesity Problem Is Getting Even Worse
Yeah, their measurement methods make a huge difference. If I go from the iliac crest, my waist is 27", but if I go from just above the navel like in study #2, it's 24.5". Using the method from study #1 could also vary wildly pre vs. post childbirth too. BMI definitely still seems the general best standard at the moment.
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Thread Where do you see yourselves 30 years from now?
Won't have any need to retire because I'll be a moderately successful novelist and script writer. I'll travel around with my husband exploring whatever nooks of the world we haven't visited yet by then, and I expect we'll have our fingers in some interesting commercial pies by then. My kids will also be just hitting 30 themselves by then, so maybe I'll have some grandkids! Looking forward to it all.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
That's really cool, though. It's an impressive amount of output to begin with, and having so many 'in play' must be very exciting, rejections or no. How on earth do you generate so much creative energy? Speaking of submissions, I had been thinking it might be a nice easy WritingOT challenge to have everyone do a short/flash fiction horror story and submit them to various podcasts for Halloween, but after my last few epic fails 'hosting' challenges, I'm not sure I should. :D I'm full of ideas and enthusiasm but no energy. Would be fun, though. My fingers are crossed for you! And thanks~ It was a pretty spot on present (do recommend it for the wife), but I spent most of it zoning out in a steam room. The only writing I managed was at the very end, frantically trying to put at least a paragraph to paper while waiting for my husband to pick me up so that I could tell him that I did writing... I love reading all these details and breakdowns, Emerson. Thanks for keeping us updated. And whatever longer term results come of it, like zulu said, how cool that you cracked those ranks! Any further future plans to promote it?
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Thread The Magnus Archives | Season 3 starts November 23rd
I'm really enjoying the main plot, but I'm liking the return to 'monster' episodes. I've gotten so little sleep these last few weeks (months?) that it's hard to keep track of all the threads when they're focusing on the overall narrative. Having those bits come after statements suits me a lot better. This week's episode was especially nice in that regard. I love unexplained mysteries like Also, anyone entering the contest? I think I'll give it a go. Be really cool to be featured and have them read your stuff~
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Thread The Magnus Archives | Season 3 starts November 23rd
Man, they're really hitting it out of the park this season. This one and Upon the Stair were fantastic. The small humorous touches really sing against the creepy backdrop. If you guys haven't yet, you might think about leaving a review on their FB page. I'm sure they could use more love to help sell it to new people:
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Thread The Magnus Archives | Season 3 starts November 23rd
Just finished season 2 and I'm eagerly awaiting season 3 now. Some very interesting bits Not really a spoiler. I think it's good for people to know that they're best listened to in order. The earlier episodes could do just fine as stand-alones, but it's the trail/breadcrumbs in the overall narrative that makes it such a great podcast~
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Thread The Magnus Archives | Season 3 starts November 23rd
Oh good. I'd grabbed the old thread from the cache and was going to restart it, but this saves me the trouble. I'm on "Hide and Seek" (ep. 79) now. Can't wait to see what goes down in the finale. For those that far,
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Thread The Dumbest Moments From Comic Books
But...womanizing "dad being dad" is somehow drawn lovingly supporting the woman he had a fling with who wants a termination because married? And she locked down hard on some poor random woman's uterus who's then conveniently used for her purpose and thrown away for a dramatic panel. I'm obviously missing the rest of the story, so maybe it is pretty good, but it rubs me the wrong way (probably because I just had a baby). But that seems to be his thing. Nice art, though.
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Thread The Dumbest Moments From Comic Books
I agree! It's one of my favorite panels. It's everything you want in a comic panel. I love how these super-powered, arrogant, manly men have this exchange and then..."toot!" It's brilliant. And dumb. I love it. No, no. It dumb. The best kind of dumb. Speedball redeemed.
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Thread Iron Fist | Season 2 on Netflix | 9/7/18 (Spoiler tagged discussion)
Even in episode one, her motivation is supposed to be There's that too, but I feel bad for Finn. He's an OK actor who's been given some terrible stuff to work with. I'm willing to let the physique/fight thing slide for him because I seem to remember that there was some kind of rush getting him into the show and there wasn't much prep, but it's the character stuff and the writing that give him no shot at making it better (IMO).
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Thread I Have to Drive One Hour and Five Minutes Each Way for Work. A Piece of My Soul Dies Every Day
I feel you. For two years I used to commute ~3hrs on 6 buses every day in LA IF the buses showed, and often they didn't or were late and I'd miss my connection. Sometimes I'd get home after 10PM. It was a really bad period. Another commuter who also often rode the bus late saw me so often that one day she approached me and gave me an envelope before she got off. Inside was $50 and a note. It said, "Life is too short to be wasting your time on a bus every day. Please take care of your health. Go out to eat and have some fun." I took her advice when I moved and found a place close enough to work that I could jog there. Best thing I did.
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Thread Iron Fist | Season 2 on Netflix | 9/7/18 (Spoiler tagged discussion)
Because he's insufferable. In season 1 he comes across as a preachy man child who is also the worst successor to a mystical power that you supposedly earn through ability and mental fortitude, that I've ever seen. He has anger issues, he's impulsive, and he's just...dumb. Well, naive. Now, I'm not saying that his story doesn't back up some of these--he was raised in a cult, basically, lost his parents at a young age, and has no experience--but they don't make for a likable character. It also doesn't help that his fight scenes aren't the best. At least Ward is amazing. That's the plot line that kept me watching.
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Thread Home cooking is making a comeback, spurred by Netflix, health consciousness, and meal kits
Oh, the Muffuletta looks lovely. I used to hate peppers and eggplant, but I use them all the time now. And there is a cooking thread (), but there a lot of professionals in there, so I always feel a bit intimidated posting my home cooking, especially when I fuss. It's dumb, I know, but there isn't much in the way of creative time with two small kids. Here's a typical week at our place:
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Thread Home cooking is making a comeback, spurred by Netflix, health consciousness, and meal kits
Thanks, yo. Having the home duties really made me go all in. I love cooking now, and seeing something on sale or strange at the shops makes it a fun game. I'll cook for anyone as long as I don't have to do the dishes... For the ribs, oven, yes! Do a dry rub*, bake at 200c for ~1hr while wrapped in tinfoil, then uncover and do another 15, flipping every 5 mins or so. For the latter stage you can do a glaze if you want more saucy ribs. I like beer, brown sugar and chili for mine. :D *I have a basic, always tasty mix if you want to know the ratios.
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Thread Home cooking is making a comeback, spurred by Netflix, health consciousness, and meal kits
There was a thread a few weeks ago where someone said they ate out 4x a week and that wasn't much at all. I can't even imagine getting takeout more than 1-2x a month. I do have the 'luxury' of doing the stay at home duties, so I can think about it more than most, but I do almost everything from scratch (even bread, and sometimes stock) and I can make 5-6 days worth of pretty nice (IMO) and diverse dinners and lunches for a family of 4 (small kids, though) for <£30. If my husband didn't need two bloody £5 greek yogurt tubs a week I'd probably get us down to pennies. Also, meal kits are silly, but I'm happy they're inspiring/helping people to cook more at home.
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Thread Is it ok to go through your significant others phone and read all the texts?
I think a need or rule to do it would be weird, but I know my husband's passcode and he knows mine, so the doors are open if either party wanted to. If he was scrolling through my texts I'd definitely raise an eyebrow and ask what's up, though. I'd rather talk stuff through if he's concerned or I'm concerned, etc.
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Thread U.S. News & World Report releases 2019 Rankings of Best USA Universities
I'm wearing my Husky pants right now. Class of 2004. You? And, did something happen to Rugby House? I remember there was a fire way back, but thought it had survived.
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Thread U.S. News & World Report releases 2019 Rankings of Best USA Universities
Gooooo, UCONN! Look how far we we've come from flipping and lighting cars on fire and tossing dressers out of windows! Oh wait, we still do it. :D
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Thread The most hated person in Britain is a boring old man
I have wondered about this all since I've moved to the UK. I haven't delved into the politics here too much since I can't vote, but every day seems like some kind of anti-Corbyn effort on the news or in the papers. What I have seen of him when he speaks and hearing about what he (purports) to stand for, he seems kind of like an all right guy, though. It's a bit confusing. Never mind. He's the obviously devil. :D
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Thread GQ Feature: Sperm Count Zero
Kind of scary but not surprising at all. It's completely anecdotal and probably just age-related, but I feel like I hear about people struggling to conceive far more often now than about ones accidentally hitting the bulls-eye.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
I'm just teasing. I always say I'm going to be sensible too and then am gripped by insanity the day before NaNo, thinking that I'll be able to bang out another novel somehow 'because NaNo'. I managed half a page last time. I love cheering people on for insane things, though, so go for it! Maybe I'll do author for those who clear it (if that interests anyone)? Then I can still live vicariously through you crazy diamonds. :D And cheers. I don't even expect to hear back from them, really, but it's fun just casting my line out into the water again after so long. On the plus side, for my birthday my husband is apparently packing me off to a spa hotel for a whole day and night for a 'writing/relax' session. I'm going to finish the latest chapter of Dead Leads if it me. After the massage, though. Awww. It's still kind of thrilling seeing anything come in, though, right? I submitted something way back in May for a contest that was supposedly slated to end after July. Heard nothing and August rolled by, so I checked back on the site to see if they'd selected anyone yet or were still reviewing, and it was just the same as it had been months before: dead. Oh well. I might drop the short story I just did in a few other places and see if something comes of it elsewhere if I don't hear anything after a few weeks. My fingers are crossed that you'll catch a big fish in the next lot. (<-- How many do you submit, btw?) I love hearing about the victories here. Fighto~
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Thread Is the Arya Stark/Brienne scene in GoT S07 the dumbest scene in GoT?
I seem to remember her last sparring session with the waif showed her getting smacked around then recovering, then getting one over on the waif, which pissed her off. Jaqen interrupted right after that, so it ended on a note of Arya on the up. She was definitely improving. Not sure how she went from zero to 60 after that, but no doubt killing the waif gave her that final (killing) experience and some confidence. Not saying it explains everything, but it's not like they didn't lay groundwork.
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Thread "By 35, You Should Have Double Your Salary Saved" - Do You?
Well, to give you a counter point since we're both going off anecdotal experience here, I ran the gamut when I got back from working abroad. Moved out to Cali because I was hired for a really, really low paid editorial job, then the company folded 6 months later in the 2008 crash. I spent 4 months struggling to make rent on my itty-bitty studio (on Rampart if that tells you anything) while I worked in a restaurant. Got my 'career' gig after that (took 4 rounds of interviews) which was also very, very modestly paid and worked my way up in the 5 years I was there. At that time I was 27 and started with $2k in the bank which was wiped out when I got laid off (no unemployment given). I'm 37 now, haven't worked properly in 3 years, as I mentioned, but I'm not too far off the goal in article. I just lived within my means, paid of any debt as soon as I could, and tried to save when I could. You could say I got lucky with my career gig, but I had been on many many interviews for others before it, and being laid off with no unemployment just 6 months into a cross country move is pretty devastating. I do understand that sometimes you get served hit after hit, but I think people are also hampered by what they think they need (cars, electronics, cable, etc.) rather than what they do and bad habits in general (credit cards, etc.). It's no fun saving...but you can.
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Thread "By 35, You Should Have Double Your Salary Saved" - Do You?
I think we're talking about different things, or different amounts, rather. I didn't mean you could meet the 'double' amount being touted here. I certainly didn't. I mean saving in general, even modest amounts. Sorry if I was a bit general there. I clarified above. Do you still think the same for any savings? Doubling does seem challenging, but doable (calamities aside). I don't feel like I made any huge effort until I was past 30, but modest spending and regular tucking away has very nearly got me there.
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Thread "By 35, You Should Have Double Your Salary Saved" - Do You?
Maybe a bit, but later seems the norm these days with all the job hopping and moving. I didn’t start mine until I was 28. Having savings isn’t dependant on being born into a higher class. Shit can happen in life to set you back, but it happens if you make an effort.
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Thread Yo, this walking stuff is pretty dope.
I've never owned a car, so I walk everywhere or take the bus/train when needed. These days I have two kids too, so I get even more exercise pushing one in a stroller with the other one strapped to my chest. Walking is the best.
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Thread How much sex do you have a week or month?
Search "perineal tear" and tell me what you think*. That's one of the most common injuries post-childbirth and far, far less bad than some of the others. *Don't go to images. I'm not that cruel. Just look at the medical drawing on the general search page.
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Thread How much sex do you have a week or month?
I can't speak for guys, but giving birth can result in traumatic physical injuries/changes and sex can be very painful for months if not years afterward. Those changes can also be very embarrassing for some women (think 3rd degree tears, C-sections, breasts after weaning, etc.) which can hit right in the confidence and make them reluctant to get naked much less intimate. Then there are the hormones which can tank any desire or lead to debilitating depression. Sleep deprivation hits you physically and mentally... The list goes on and on.
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Thread How much sex do you have a week or month?
2-3x per week now that I have the kids trained to do 7-7 at night. It's tough to have the energy or inclination sometimes with a 2 yr old and a baby, but it's always worth the effort just for the mental boost. I totally feel other parents with the blah, though. Not quite every other day, but we only just got out of the 6 month sleep deprivation hell from #2. Am I crazy for considering a third? Once you get their sleeping in order it's not too bad. It's true that you're so fried sometimes that you kind of just want to puddle on the couch, but like I said above, it's not forever and I haven't found it to be lame. Hell, it's more fun in some ways because you have to get creative a lot of the time time/location-wise.
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Thread So I'm At the Airport ...
Definitely a hazard. They could have rid themselves of the danger so much more quickly, though. The flight was cancelled for bad weather so the plane never left, but they wouldn't return anyone's luggage. When flights started up again, there was no room for my husband, but they still insisted on sending his luggage. Without him. And it was a day business trip so he had no reason to go to Indiana anymore because he'd already missed his meetings, but they wouldn't give him back his stuff. He had to buy new ones from the airport and go to his next meetings in a different state with the same clothes because he had to wait for them to reroute his baggage from Indiana...
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Thread I have completely cut pop out of my diet. Have you?
Yep. It's been...15+ years now? I'll definitely give that some credit to how I've kept the pounds off after weight loss. Great for the teeth too. If you can do it, I recommend it to everyone. Relatively easy lifestyle change that'll net you tangible results.
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Thread Ariana grande being sexually assaulted at Aretha Franklin's funeral
Sexual Assault covers a broad range of stuff but is by definition unwanted sexual touching, which this is. It doesn't have to be him sticking his hands down her top to be covered by the term. This is what I meant before and why she's not going to say anything because half the people don't even see it as sexual assault. Why bother when you're going to have to justify the 'fuss' you're causing.
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Thread Ariana grande being sexually assaulted at Aretha Franklin's funeral
There's definitely boob touching going on there. She's squirming and her face says it all. This kind of stuff flies under the radar all the time because it's not the blatant boob grabbing that people can point at and say ah-HA! Improper touching! I used to wonder if guys even did it consciously because it'd happen so often. You'd wiggle out from under their fingers, or shift them off you and they'd give you a surprised look, like "Oh! Is something wrong?" If you called them on it, you'd get that same wide-eyed confusion that made you think you'd made a mistake or were being presumptuous. Took me till I got into my 30s to be confident enough in my own assessment to tell guys off for touching me. Ariana's not going to make a big deal out of it because she doesn't want to make a fuss (or that kind of publicity) over something that tons of people aren't even going to recognize as sexual assault, like most women.
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Thread I don't understand how having kids improves one's quality of life by any measure
Was just thinking about this yesterday morning when everything was in full swing (a 2.5yr old, 9 month old, husband, and two cats). I had kids quite late compared to my parents - Mom was 17, I was 34 - because I was traveling, studying, working on my career, etc. so I came into this having met all the goals/dreams I'd set for my 'solo' life and ready for a new experience. Kids can be immensely satisfying. Teaching them, making them happy, watching them grow and develop... It's amazing stuff. And damn, they're funny. The two year old somehow dishes out the coldest retorts to her dad, the baby snorts when she laughs which makes her fart which makes her laugh. Every day has some new and entertaining weirdness. It's everything I hoped it would be so far. Your mileage may vary, but kids are the ultimate human experience, IMO. But(!), if you don't want them, feel ready for them, etc., there's no need to have them. Do what works for you and what you want out of life. Easy.
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Thread Bride cancels wedding after guests refused to pay $1500 attendance fee
I think our guest list came to 44 in the end, so no, not a big guest list (I'm def with you on smaller #s). We had family and friends that had to fly from across the US, Australia, Japan, England, etc., so we weren't expecting a big turnout, but we'd only invited 50, so it was almost spot on in the end. But it was, like I mentioned, a premium venue with high tier food/bar options because everyone was coming so far. I did forget about the photographer, though. That's 2k of the total (final bill was just over 9k according to my records) right there. So venue, food, open bar, photographer, dress, hair, celebrant, decorations, DJ, gifts for bridal party, etc. for 9k+. I feel like I did pretty good overall, and we didn't actually end up paying for anything in the end, so it's not like we were put out. For the courthouse/elopement thing, it IS a big saving, so I can't argue with people there. :D Agreed on the rest, of course. Now, what's the dumbest/craziest thing you've seen pushed as a 'necessity' for a wedding? Donut wall? Mashitini bar? ...Wow. Really? And it was a Vera Wang, too? I mean, what are they going to do with after? I'm as boggled as you.
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Thread Bride cancels wedding after guests refused to pay $1500 attendance fee
Well, I think he/she does have a point. You do tend to get a fair number of people going to the other extreme and seemingly implying that anyone who spends a dime on a wedding is a fool. I do think the wedding 'machine' is a racket and that you're better off bucking some (or all) of the conventions, but I spent ~$10k on our wedding which would be obscene to many here. I got a second hand wedding dress, had my aunt do the cake, the ceremony was 3 minutes, I did all the decorations, had no flowers except for the bouquets which I did myself, etc., but I wanted a nice venue, good food, and an open bar for all the people flying overseas. So, it's a balance, IMO.
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Thread Bride cancels wedding after guests refused to pay $1500 attendance fee
Yeah, this part always kills me. It's a dress (usually hideous and is unmistakable as a bridesmaid's dress so you can never use it again) that you wear once, almost always need to be fitted, and they cost a fortune. I was really, really annoyed with my sister for her wedding because I had to wear a strapless bright teal get-up that cost $130 off the rack, another $60 to be fitted, and special shoes that had to be at extra cost to match. All for one night on top of all the other stuff. For another friend I was dressed like a pink barbie in 6inch heels. Bless her for making it herself, though. For my own wedding I told my bridesmaids that they weren't expected to buy anything, just wear their favorite black dress (as almost every woman has one of these). It's such a racket.
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Thread Bride cancels wedding after guests refused to pay $1500 attendance fee
Right? Aside from all her insanity, I found that part stood out quite a bit. I was stuck in the same shoes as you and had to plan it all because I was in the states and my husband was getting our Australian digs set up. Not getting your partner for something like this seems like a recipe for disaster. Looks like you didn't just get yours but also have very good taste. :) Great cake, and this is coming from someone who used to do wedding cake decorating. Love the log pedestal.
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Thread Bride cancels wedding after guests refused to pay $1500 attendance fee
She cray-cray, but I don't know what he was thinking suggesting a Vegas wedding. He couldn't have read her worse if he tried. Or maybe it was exactly the reaction he wanted? Heh.
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Thread Bride cancels wedding after guests refused to pay $1500 attendance fee
My husband showed me the reddit thread last night and it was definitely eyebrow-raising. Weddings sure do make people crazy. Nothing wrong with doing a dream wedding if you save and budget for it, but what she did? Wow. I liked how she ended it with disappearing for a few months to cleanse herself while leaving her kid behind. She's certainly special.
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Thread What role and place do conservatives and Republicans have on this fourm?
Yes, they have a place. Absolutely. I think telling conservatives and Republicans that they are not welcome here just contributes to polarization and is a disservice to real discussion. Let anyone who comes stay or leave based on their behavior. As others have said, be prepared to engage and back up your views or bow out. The people who play games, make games, and want to talk about games are going to come from all sides. Let everyone be welcome until they show that they're not able to abide by the TOS.
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Thread RPGamer Editor-in-Chief, #TeamHandheld Founder Michael A. Cunningham Passes Away
Though I knew he'd been struggling with cancer it was such a shock when I heard he'd passed. I've known Michael for years from RPGamer's Run to the Sun events and just speaking with them for various things while at XSEED. I have tons of good memories of him. He was a lovely guy with an infectious passion for games in and out of work, and highly regarded in the industry. He'll be sorely missed.
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Thread New study states that there's no safe level of alcohol in humans
I didn't mean current research is false, just that one of the studies that kicked off the idea that alcohol (red wine in this case) has health benefits was found to be falsified. Dr. Dipak K. Das' UCONN study: "," etc.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
Yeah, I feel you. I'm sure there are plenty of people, people who have been decent and professional for no other reason than that's how you should act, who deserve opportunities like this far more. I certainly don't think her life would have been ruined or anything. She didn't kill anyone, she was just a rude idiot. Any hurdles she got from that she could overcome with effort. Hope she sees that and appreciates what she got. ? The luck part I mentioned a few times before having to do with Hickam being even willing to listen to her. I'm not saying I think luck was purely what pulled her out of the hole. I think whatever she said when speaking to him did the trick. But I definitely agree that it played a part.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
It was the part in his response where he said that after talking with her he felt certain she deserved a position and would do all that he could to secure her something. That's above and beyond for just an apology accepted. Maybe he does feel a little guilty and that's driving it, but it sounded liked they'd talked shop too. Bit of both? What bad act is being promoted? She herself? She deservedly lost the internship and apologized. He accepted it and after talking still felt like she had something to offer. I don't think him forgiving her and giving her another chance says that he thinks that behavior was acceptable or promotes it, just that he was kind enough to give someone another go. Time will tell if she actually deserves it.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
Because I think it was based on the apology/whatever they talked about afterward, not the action that led to it. Do you think potential NASA employees are going to be more abusive/vulgar/careless now because he did? I don't think that's the takeaway lesson here (seems more of a cautionary story now than anything), though as I've said, I think she was damned lucky. No one else is going to expect that to happen again. I imagine it'll be a sore point for many aerospace employees and she'll have to do a lot to earn their trust and make up for it. And good, she should.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
We can only really go off of what Hickam himself said in the OP. Apparently he believed it and was impressed to think it would be a loss to not let her have another go. As he's the wronged party here, I think he's in the best position to decide what should be done with her in regards to NASA opportunities. I don't think she's being rewarded for bad behavior (damned lucky, though), but as you say, we can't tell at this point if she's actually learned any lessons, especially if she does see it that way. I think we're just thinking of net positive in different way. I see a crappy situation that could have just ended with her getting canned, him still being gone, and a feeling of once again pointless abuse and idiocy reigning supreme on social media. That they were able to talk and Hickam got a proper apology makes me feel like something moved forward at least, that's all. And you're absolutely right. That's probably the only lesson we can really be sure of that she learned. Hopefully there's more, though.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
So you don't think Hickam's judgement counts for anything here? Is it wrong to let someone who did something shitty have another chance if the person they wronged forgives them and supports them in it? What would be the ideal outcome here then, in your opinion?
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
Her apology was apparently enough to impress the guy she was a dick to that he not only forgave her but has since been pushing for her to get a job there. That doesn't say anything? For a 'better person', I mean someone who gets a good long look at what their actions did, acknowledges that, and will presumably grow from the experience, which I don't think is an unreasonable assumption for something this big. My 'happy ending' is less pointlessly bad shit, people learning, net social good, etc.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
Of course, and increasingly these days people are finding that they're being held accountable for what they say, which is fine. But there are degrees. This is why I think the hard line stance some people have here is kind of misplaced in this case. We have someone who was rude and abrasive and not just to anyone, but in karmic fashion, to one of the worst people she possibly could have been. It's a poignant reminder to be decent in general. And whether she meant it all to happen or not, she lost what was expected by everyone involved. But even sifting the intent aside, we have this apology that was apparently sincere enough to not just be accepted but get this guy in her corner fighting for her. Hickam may just be a gentleman, but owning up to your mistake and apologizing properly to the other person has to count for something. Is the general social precedent to never be given a second chance? I do think second shots are perfectly warranted (though not expected) if the person genuinely gets that they screwed up and apologize/try to better. Yes, it's satisfying to see asshole behavior met so poetically, but shouldn't we be celebrating a jerk seeing what their actions net AND becoming a better person for it rather than just another jerk getting tagged and doing the equivalent of the youtube sigh? This seems like a good outcome for a bad thing for a change.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
I could see why it would be hard to believe (there being anything sincerely positive in any of this) given how often we see this shit played out on Twitter and Youtube, etc. and maybe there's just BS fatigue. I don't think this particular situation warrants such a strong reaction given all the information, but I do tend to stick more to less contentious threads.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
Not even her contacting him to apologize? I won't argue that she was lucky as hell that Hickam was even willing to listen to her apology, but she must have done something right. It seems like they had an actual conversation instead of one of those generic contrition statements and were able to connect and have a meaningful discussion. Twitter is such a terrible way to talk, so bypassing that and actually speaking to each other seems like a win for decency and mature communication, right?
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
I don't think many people are defending her, exactly, just that there's context which doesn't make it as black and white as her intending to tarnish her employers, and certainly not to drive someone who worked for them off of Twitter. She was a jerk and sure as heck embarrassed herself, but the harassment that followed wasn't anything she condoned or encouraged on as far as I know. Losing the internship following that on top of her exchange with Hickam was a given, and that's a deserved life lesson. She really put her foot in it, even without the harassment. She contacted him and apologized and it seems he accepted it and more which is incredibly rare. I would bet that this is a pivotal moment for her and she'll be a better person for it. It's actually a nice, positive outcome in what generally is a shitshow. Hopefully her screw up will encourage other people to be less asshole-ish online.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
I can't see her follow-up to him identifying himself, so I don't know how she responded, but her initial tweet was fine and if she thought some random twitter user was trying to tell her how to behave, I can see why she snarked back. Damned embarrassing that she didn't know who he was, though, and the harassment directed towards him afterward is inexcusable. I'm glad she reached out and apologized and they were able to resolve it between them.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
I called it 'snarking' because the way Hickman only posted one word came off like that old lady at the supermarket that tut-tuts you for cursing when you drop a Honeydew on your foot. She 'retorted' to that finger wagging tone (IMO). Personally, I don't understand why people are so rude and abrasive online or act differently than they do in real life, but it doesn't seem out of the norm for Twitter, hence calling it 'snark'.
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Thread Someone gets a NASA Internship and then loses it over twitter
I think there's some room here, though. She had gotten it. If she'd started the job, had it in her visible profile, and then abused people it'd be a different story, but swearing excitedly over landing a dream internship and being a jerk to another twitter user* it's a bit much to say she's tarnishing her employer yet. Hickam was generous to give her the heads up to act like an adult, especially if you name your company, but I'd say the telling would be how she comported herself afterwards. Especially with such a significant reminder. I'd agree that as an adult you really shouldn't need a reminder like that, but I'm happy to let people learn and improve on softer matters. *I think it's pretty obvious she didn't realize who this guy was. A lesson to be more mature in general, to be sure. As I said, it's her response after he identified himself I haven't seen.
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Thread New study states that there's no safe level of alcohol in humans
There's no need to drink, but it pretty fun (for most). There's something to be said for the creative benefits too. I do all my best writing with a glass of wine or a pint.
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Thread New study states that there's no safe level of alcohol in humans
I think it all stemmed from some study a guy at my school did which later turned out to be falsified. I still cling to the delicious illusion, though. It was late and I was hungry. My hands were tied, basically. :D
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Thread Jamie Oliver accused of appropriating Jamaican culture by British MP ("jerk rice")
Heeheehee Maybe he realized after fighting to improve school lunches so long that people are just fucking lazy and will default to insta-food however easier or better it is to cook it yourself. Are his insta-products really unhealthy or something? I could see the hypocrisy there if that's the case. There's no reason you can't do both, though. Haha. So true. I often use his website for inspiration because there's a such big variety, but the recipes themselves are often absurd (Marked "EASY" but takes 6 hours and 48 ingredients) and blah when you do try them.
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Thread Jamie Oliver accused of appropriating Jamaican culture by British MP ("jerk rice")
It's a combo, really. Making money off the name/reputation of a cultural staple while also bastardizing it. Inauthentic, opportunistic, a gollywobbler without a boom vang.
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Thread Are you rich? Have you landed your dream job? If so, how did you do it?
Yeah... 3-4x a week sounds outrageous to me. It's not like we couldn't eat out more, but 1-2x a month is even kind of unusual for us. , since your wife loves to cook, you guys could save a ton more. Is there some reason you eat out so much? You could say it was a fortuitous combo of hobby, experience, and good luck. I studied International Relations at school, so it's not like I was even an English major, but I did the JET Programme (teaching exchange in Japan) for three years, then worked in comic books for a bit, then made the jump to video games by randomly answering a Craigslist ad for the position and surviving the interview process. So, read a lot, had Japanese experience, and peripheral editing experience, plus I'm a writer. The Craigslist ad was a total fluke, though. I've never seen a headhunter so happy. Dude sent me cookies and flowers when they hired me. Haha.
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Thread Are you rich? Have you landed your dream job? If so, how did you do it?
3-4 is a ton. There are 7 days in the week. Eating out for half of those isn't "that much," it's a bloody lot. When you're traveling for work it's different, but if you're home I think that's crazy.
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Thread Are you rich? Have you landed your dream job? If so, how did you do it?
I feel rich as sin and I have(ish, since I'm kind of on baby leave still) my dream job. I have savings, a swanky coffee machine, two children, the AFL channel, and good wine any time I want it. I do video game localization and a publisher bought my first book and is also paying me to write the sequel right now. Hoping to write for a game next. EDIT to add: I landed my gigs by reading a ton, traveling, and taking risks. I also had really good luck/timing.
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Thread IGN to scrub Filip Miucin from site almost completely after even more plagiarism surfaces (READ OP)
Aye. I mean, there's always room for improvement, especially if the industry wants to shake off people always saying games 'journalism' with air quotes, but I don't think it's feasible for companies (yet) since there's no actual real way to catch stuff like this unless you harness the power of the internet's collective interest/boredom. Even if you throw some interns into the meat grinder, are you actually going to get results? And is it even a good use of manpower considering that a lot of plagiarism isn't just 1-1 copying, i.e. easily identifiable, and they'd be spending extra time puzzling out potential instances? For his LinkedIn thing, it looks extra embarrassing on top of everything else, but it's not uncommon for people to just use templates like that because companies themselves are often searching for those very bullet points/key words for potential employees. I'd say it's just lazy/dumb rather than another 'gotcha', tbh.
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Thread IGN to scrub Filip Miucin from site almost completely after even more plagiarism surfaces (READ OP)
Works for me just clicking it now. EDIT: Works bc it redirected me to the UK ver. Still up there.
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Thread IGN to scrub Filip Miucin from site almost completely after even more plagiarism surfaces (READ OP)
Thanks. I thought it tackled the crux of their issue (and others that I've seen), and laid it out from a general company perspective on why this kind of thing (despite being so rampant in this case) is hard to spot, but hey. And I am curious if they could pass your test. You'd have to restrict it to a certain number of people and have a time limit, too, to show the real restrictions that HR/managers are under. And you'd probably have to make at least 15 fake applicants to submit to each, each with large bodies of work... :P
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Thread IGN to scrub Filip Miucin from site almost completely after even more plagiarism surfaces (READ OP)
The scale of the plagiarism is something that's come to light after one instance finally got tagged. It was a starting point that lead everyone to all this. What starting point would IGN have had? The only opportunity would have been after his hiring IF an overseeing editor or manager somehow had watched or read whatever article he plucked from AND noticed some similarities. The only real opportunity you could say was the borrowing from his coworker. In that case the similarities might have been noticed because there was a chance that the same overseeing editor or manager looked at both. But what if two different people checked those reviews/previews? Again, unless they had some reason to suspect Miucin, why would anyone think there was anything amiss about his article? There's an argument to be made here that internally, articles/scripts could be fed through something like what they use in academia, but this is not the norm for the vast majority of companies. You just don't suspect your coworkers, your professional peers of malfeasance unless you have some kinds of signs. In terms of the vetting process, it's not the norm to treat potential hires like the CIA would. Criminal checks, references, degrees, heck, even credit checks, but you're not going in there with the expectation/suspicion that their portfolio is anything but their own original body of work. Again, you could make an argument here that they could invest in some kind of anti-plagiarism tool, but unless they've developed one for podcasts, youtube transcripts, etc., I don't know how useful it'd be. Basically, you're asking for a level of scrutiny associated with jobs where lives are at stake, not entertainment gigs. Is that realistic to have expected it of IGN? Is it even realistic to expect it following this?
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Thread IGN to scrub Filip Miucin from site almost completely after even more plagiarism surfaces (READ OP)
Or you could actually read it since I did you the same courtesy and addressed your points? It's fine if you disagree.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
Sorry, Blade. I don't think doing chores and helping out with stuff like renovations entitles you to anything. That's just you pitching in with where you live/family stuff/educational. It's not bonus, in my opinion, though I could see how it might make you feel like you were owed something. I also assume your parents might plan on leaving them/something to you when they're gone? But even if they didn't, I'm not sure I'd say I feel I was 'owed' that kind of support post-30. Heck, even 25 seems like a bit much to me. But I don't think that's the case for this guy anyway. He just seems to think he's owed an eternal nest or something.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
I don't disagree with you that it would (naturally) vary from person to person, but I'm a bit tired of hearing this "boot straps" go-to whenever anyone suggests that making an effort or putting themselves out there resulted in some kind of success and might work for others. It's just not. It's life. If you try, sometimes things happen. If you don't try, nothing happens. No one expects success all of the time. I wouldn't call that year off of mine any kind of 'success' at all. It was the constant failure that benefited me in the end. I wasn't social to start. I didn't have some great work ethic right off the bat, and I took that year off not just because of money fears but because I'd stopped going to class. I barely cleared that last semester before I left because all I did was sleep. I wasn't 'fine'. But don't get me wrong. I'm not advocating for anything other than trying. I understand that there are degrees of things and life doesn't just unlock proportionate to the effort you put in. I just think the failures are as valuable as the successes, and boy do you get a lot of fail if you strike out on your own early. :P Anyway, I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit. You put yourself out there all the time with your work, and you sound like you'd make a fine father because you care. That's the important part, really.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
Yeah, that's the "hellish-year off" I referred to in the post you quoted. The struggle was definitely real. A lot of it was pride, though. I could have gone home, but I was determined to make it on my 'own' (I made it thanks to friends' floors, a kindly aunt, sympathetic restaurant owners, the hardiness of my gutetc.). It probably wasn't the brightest thing to do, but I'm stubborn. It totally was a learning experience, though! That's when I was apprenticed to a baker, saw 9/11 firsthand, rolled around Italy for a while, went to Egypt, sold art, learned to budget like no one's business... EDIT to add: I agree with you, though. I wouldn't want my kid to do that. That's why I plan on doing a softer approach with mine while still strongly encouraging self-sufficiency and independence.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
It's been a pretty big part of the discussion for several of the pages just prior to your post, so I think I can express a little incredulity when you post something as general as that. Here's what I posted a bit farther back outlining some of the 'rent' concept (not sure if you saw it): And this post from sleepInsom covers it nicely as well:
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
1) Needing money - I took every job on offer no matter how shitty it was. Judging from recent threads everyone seems to think they deserve/are going to land their dream job immediately or that some stuff is beneath them (this recent prevailing idea that a job MUST be emotionally or spiritually satisfying to be acceptable), but that's just not realistic, especially when you're just starting out. I highly recommend taking 'undesirable' jobs because you'll learn a lot, they're always in demand, and if you work your way up even a little they seem to be really well paid (septic cleaning, garbage man, sewer inspector, etc.). But I don't recommend moving furniture. My back still aches. :( 2) Apply for everything - Be bold! I just threw my hat in the ring for anything that sounded even remotely interesting, experience or no. Did I know how to ride a horse? Sort of. Was I remotely qualified to take groups of people up a mountain? Probably not. I had no problem mucking stalls or grooming, so all I had to do was the interview. The 'interview' was getting on the horse and them waving a plastic bag in its face. It bolted (of course), but I stayed on. HIRED. 3) Some networking - Make friends with everyone, work hard, and some relationships will bear unexpected fruit. I mean, it's already been explained ad nauseam on these last couple of pages... Exactly. And yeah to the bolded. Perhaps things are changing, but a lack of (perceived) ambition, independence, and maturity is a huge turn off for many. There are always exceptions, I'm sure, but a guy living at home with his parents is not the most desirable of situations in the US (West?).
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
Mihos already answered you on the specifics of this (~5%), which is a far cry from the abandonment apocalypse you seem to think is going on here, but my comments were more directed to your insistence that all these parents must hate their children and vice versa. It's absurd, as I and others have tried to explain to you. I don't doubt that some parents are more hard line than others, but generally the idea is as I've said: to teach the kid about real world responsibilities. You keep going here ("being selfish and not value family members over silly money and vacations ") when the reasonable motivations have been explained by myself and others. If you want to keep clamping your hands over your ears and holding onto some evil fantasy because it makes you feel superior or something, you're welcome to, but it silly. My mom gave me the 18 cut off and I left at 17. If I had needed to come home it would have been there, but the things I wanted (college, travel, independence to do what I wanted, etc.) were up to me as an adult to achieve on my own. Being responsible for myself was (obviously) very motivating. I applied for scholarships, worked, put myself through college, got my own place with roommates, etc. I made reasonable choices with money because I had so little, and I chased every dream I had because my mother taught me that the world was open if I was willing to fight for it. And you know what? She was right. Was it hard sometimes? Sure. But was it instrumental in where I am now and what I've achieved? Absolutely. I don't hate my mom at all. We have a great relationship. Any money she has (house, savings, etc.) I hope she spends having a ball in her twilight years. She deserves it. And when she gets too old to manage things my sister and I will share the time and care of her. Then...find a job you love, whatever the pay is? Or a job you respect, or a job you do because it helps others. Or join a care service like the Peace Corps that covers your upkeep and volunteer your time? You have tons of choices. You don't need much if your wants out of life are simple. You certainly seem to like the things others work on and produce (anime, media, food, shelter), so do something. Your position has nothing to do with shitty capitalism--it's all on you.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
That sounds like it's more on you than the jobs out there. What exactly have you tried so far? I hated: Moving furniture Pizza Hut Hostessing Waitressing Catering Childcare I liked: Simulation work Political office job Locksmithing Teaching ESL Social media coordinator Groundskeeper I loved: Horseback trail guide Animal care Baking Writing books Video game localization Comic book copyeditor EDIT to add: The "no matter the pay" bit was for him specifically since he seems to claim to hate capitalism and all its trappings. Money means nothing to him, but he has basic needs/wants (food, shelter, games), so even a lower paying one would help him achieve or get closer to this, especially if he's just going to loaf at home.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
I did. I graduated high school at 17 and went to college straight after. I couldn't afford the school I wanted so I attended a state school I could (they're cheaper if you live in-state). Most colleges (or many at least, I believe) require you to live on campus for the first two(?) years, so that was my 'housing'. Honestly, that was the most annoyingly expensive part of it for me. They required you to get a meal plan too that was more suited to a starving athlete than someone trying to be as frugal as possible. I took out ~7k in loans to cover my housing/first two years because I didn't qualify for financial aid because of my parents (even though they didn't contribute to my school at all), applied for a gazillion scholarships, and worked part-time. I worked when I was in high school too, though. In the middle of this my parents went bankrupt and suddenly I qualified for financial aid and had money to spare. I used that towards sharing an apartment with roommates and doing study abroad so that I'd have a more attractive 'resume' for diplomatic jobs (my course of study). During my last year I applied for and interviewed for the JET Programme (teaching in Japan) to secure myself a post-college job. I was accepted and moved over there to work for three years, the pay from which I used to pay off my loans in full. Basically, I scraped, saved, and finagled my way though the five years following my graduation from high school. I did have to take a year off in the middle of college because I was scared to take out any more loans, and boy was that ever rough, but I think I learned more in that hell-ish year off than at any other time--namely, what I actually needed vs. what I wanted. It's served me pretty well in life since. Anyway, your situation (and your country's) is completely different. Staying at home makes sense because of the economic climate in addition to cultural reasons. Nothing wrong with that. For the US and other Western countries, though, I think the idea that leaving the nest is beneficial for maturity/what you do as an adult makes sense too (for some), or, as long as the kid is moving forward somehow (school, work, etc.), then staying at home is perfectly reasonable as well.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
I don't think everything has to be about a disorder. The guy has enough awareness and social ability to go on multiple live interviews, argue his 'case' in court, and father a child. He just seems like an entitled leech who's a bit awkward. Seems festive for a funeral. My money's on wedding. I'm just joking. Dude could get by with a few shirts and ties to switch it up. I think 30 is waaaay too late. 19-25 sounds more reasonable to me, barring other circumstances like what Cas mentioned. There's no hard answer, though. I think as long as you're contributing and moving forward in some way (working, saving, school) it's fine. Still really defensive and silly.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
I wonder how long a 30 year old with work experience or motivation to work will last when he finds out they expect him to work for that check. EDIT: Fixed
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
Yup. Pretty much. A bit of effort and reciprocation goes a loooong way. As long as my kid is driving forward and trying I'm happy to support them. That's why I find it strange how so many people seem to think teaching your kid about real world obligations like 'rent' is cruel somehow. I think good parenting means equipping your children with the tools to make it out there, i.e. be an adult, and this is one way of doing that. It's not a one-size fits all solution, but it's perfectly reasonable, in my opinion. Sorry. Couldn't help myself.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
I think people are taking the 'rent' thing to really extreme places, as if parents are demanding payment purely for greed or to spite the kids for existing. In my experience, and I feel like this is generally the norm, the concept of the rent is to 1) help teach the kid about real world responsibilities. Paying on time, budgeting, having a regular job to have enough money saved up for regular bills, etc. One thing I had noticed that was different in my 20s between myself and freshly out of the house peers when it came to renting in the real world was that they seemed to think rent was a suggestion or flexible somehow. The number of times I heard about them being late, or 'forgetting', or not having enough when they were roommating was really common. 2) Asking for rent is to encourage them to get out of the house and onto their own feet. It's a motivator and deterrent for lingering on past the point of needing to stay home. 3) Defraying costs. I think most kids just pitch in for bills, but sometimes it covers this as well. And in some cases also (I'll probably do this or some version), the 'rent' collected is (unbeknownst to them) put into an account and given back to the kid when they move out so that they have a nice bit of money saved up for emergencies. Basically, the leap to they must hate their children to 'treat them like strangers' seems really defensive and a bit silly.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
I don't think it's unreasonable to suggest what Zoukka did. From my own experience, I also think people mature faster and gain more experiences when living on their own. Obviously there are plenty of circumstances where living at home a bit longer makes sense, but getting out on your own isn't some impossible task where only the rich have the option. Not everyone who managed to make a go of it did so because of any 'privileges'. We just got roommates, worked multiple jobs, and/or spent within our means be it in daily life, school, or other.
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Thread 30-year-old man is being sued by his parents because he refuses to leave home
Can’t say I personally understand the stay at home when you’re an adult mentality, but this guy takes all the cakes. What an entitled man child. Shameful. What part of this situation is cold blooded? The guy appreciates nothing, contributes nothing, doesn’t do .
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Thread Free Portrait Drawings!
Great job, Prax (as usual)! More to come~ Sorry for the loss of your friend, AK. And sorry I couldn't make something of the pic you posted. I did have better luck with your image, though (kind of?). I tried my best, but pen is a very unforgiving tool... Will be getting to some others in the thread soon too (I hope).
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Thread Free Portrait Drawings!
Here you go! I have no idea what your actual hair/eyes/tone really is, so I just screwed around in pixlr with my mouse for fun. :D Here's the B&W as well. Have a go if you like~ Oh, neato! There's something a little Edward Gorey about your style, MetalLord. I like it!
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Thread Free Portrait Drawings!
Haha. Told you I had a bunch! But yes, with two kids and an average of 4 hours of sleep a night in right now I can't even get a regular shower much less run a thread. I AM keen to participate should I get a free 15 minutes one of these days. One of these days... ;_;
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Thread As a Slav, I don't understand what is this "hey, smile" thing in USA...
Of course it's absurd. I'm just saying some guys genuinely think they're doing a nice thing. Forcing you to 'brighten' your day. I want to know why they feel this need for women to smile. It's not for the benefit of society or they'd give a crap about unhappy-looking boys. What life lesson or experience teaches guys that this is a good thing to do? It's so weird. Has any guy in here ever told a woman to smile? Genuinely curious at the thought process. Such a fleeting payoff, too.
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Thread As a Slav, I don't understand what is this "hey, smile" thing in USA...
Is this really an American thing? It's happened to me in other countries. Guys always tell you to smile. When I was in high school and worked at Pizza Hut a customer (older man) even gave me $5 to do it.
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Thread As a Slav, I don't understand what is this "hey, smile" thing in USA...
I don't really know what his intentions were. In his mind maybe he was just trying to cheer up some poor girl working at a shitty fast food place. It just stands out because of the length he went to get that smile. Guys don't do this to other guys, as far as I know. Why there's this need for women to smile, I don't know.
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Thread One of my teeth just cracked off at the gumline
Jeez... Sugar is devil. I just started taking my kids in for regular checkups since my eldest turned two and I was super nervous because other people were telling me they took their kids in when the first tooth popped, but the dentist passed us with flying colors. When she asked about our routine I mentioned the no sugar thing and she said that would be it. She'd just seen a 1 and a half year old with black stumps for teeth because his parents gave him juice and soda all the time to keep him 'happy'. Been getting steadily worse in the UK, according to her. Good luck, OP. I'm sure they'll be able to fix it. Cut back on your sweets if you can and save yourself some pain and money later on.
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Thread I’m a WNBA player. Men won’t stop challenging me to play one-on-one (WaPo)
Yeah, it seems to be a regular thing in threads like these. I don't think they actually intend it that sharply, to be honest, but it's oblivious at the least. I'd wager it's more directed towards their own subconscious insecurities. Sorry, BG. I should probably clarify mine a bit more as well. I don't think you, or anyone bringing it up here has any nefarious or shitty purpose. I don't think you're sexist. I don't think you mean anything by it at all. Like I said, to you guys you're just discussing facts. For the bolded, I meant it as more a subconscious thing. I also don't think every guy has the urge to measure themselves against anything that moves. I'm still curious though, why do you and others feel the need to have this conversation about how women don't measure up to men in response to an article/thread highlighting the sexism she faces from guys about her position, her skill? You said you wouldn't have posted it directly in response to the OP, but it's still within the conversation. I'm not saying that conversation doesn't have a place somewhere, but why? And why not just even the general, yeah women can't compete at a men's level? Why did you feel you needed to go even further with the high school thing? Was it really just for precision's sake? You just felt you had to correct the other poster because he forgot to include children in his > women rankings since he missed the others who were saying it already? If you step back and see that in the context of this thread, it's pretty crummy. I'm not sure you'll agree with me, but that is the way it comes off, intended or no. I rambled way too much, but I think other women feel similarly so I thought I'd say something. No problem. Like I said above, I don't think guys mean anything by it half the time, but man it gets old. I apologize to for singling him out, but it never fails to come up. And, yeah. For some I imagine it is that way. Most guys don't need to validate themselves like that, I don't think, but there's always some...
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Thread I’m a WNBA player. Men won’t stop challenging me to play one-on-one (WaPo)
I struggled similarly trying to respond to you because it's not like it's incorrect, exactly. It's just...tactless? A kind of passive, polite assholery one stepped removed from the guys challenging Peters (and therefore 'acceptable'). Like, you guys who agree that those challenging her are being jerks for doing it would never do it, but not entirely because it's a jerk move -- it's because you don't see the point as even high schoolers can beat professional women. There's no challenge there for men, nothing to be gained, no threat, etc. You don't feel insecure like these other dudes because it's not logical to you. And I say this because you all seem to agree that it's trash behavior yet still feel the need to dissect and qualify exactly inferior women are to men in sports. And it's generally politely, clinically done because to you guys you're just discussing facts here. So why is it a problem? It's just facts, right? That's why I struggled too. I don't want to make an argument based on feels. I'm not offended. I'm just bloody annoyed. Especially because (and it's not just you) those kinds of statements are followed up with stuff like "That's not to take anything away from the accomplishment of female athletes," as if that makes it better somehow. You've just said that kids can beat even the best of us, but hey, good effort! See? Kinda shitty, right? So I guess the problem is: do you think it helps the issue that Peters is experiencing, the point of this thread ostensibly, by saying that professional women not only can't compete with top level men's teams, but that they can even be beaten by boys? Do you think women are unaware of our general physical limitations? That we need to be reminded constantly of that fact in threads like this? If this were a thread on women's progress/future in sports I wouldn't have a problem at all. But it's not one of those, and we're not burying our heads in the sand about the physical thing. So, why do guys always feel the need to bring it up? It's not for our benefit, I promise.
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Thread Study: Barely missing out in a math competition leads to girls quitting at twice the rate of boys
Can't say there isn't some truth to it, at least in my experience. I was a Math pro in middle school. Top of my class, got awards, won prizes, etc. Got to high school and the first week there in algebra I struggled a bit and the teacher kept singling me out until one day he used a roll of papers to hit me over the head to punctuate "What. A. Stupid. Girl. You. Are!" in front of the entire class. I never came back from that. One 'loss' and I was out. Not exactly the same as a competition, but at an impressionable age, it had a huge effect. Wish I'd fought back, but confidence in high school is pretty hard to come by sometimes. I can see how the 'underconfident' in general thing plus taking a knock in a subject that women have also been routinely told they're not good at would end up that way.
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Thread I’m a WNBA player. Men won’t stop challenging me to play one-on-one (WaPo)
I was kind of including you in that, BG. Her experience has devolved into guys going through the Rolodex of sports to confirm that women can't compete in the top levels, but just to make sure that we don't give them too much credit, let's go even further and make it clear that even some high school teams can 'trounce' them. But, here's a back-handed compliment on how they do it to challenge themselves. Thanks?
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Thread Any interest in a hunting thread?
I'm not a fan of hunting for sport, but I wouldn't mind carrying over my shooting skills to do a bit of practical hunting. And I love fishing. Haven't had much time in recent years, but it's something I'm interested in. Would love to hear about people's experiences and advice on starter equipment (bows probably better since I doubt my husband would agree to even a rifle in the house).
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Thread Emma and Lachy are getting a divorce.
Give us some dirt! It was suggested that Captain Feathersword "tickled her 'fancy' more," or that Henry couldn't keep his hands to himself, or that Wags being such a dog might have been the suspect. Cold spaghetti, cold spaghetti...
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Thread Emma and Lachy are getting a divorce.
Oh my god, really? To parents of small children this is big news. I've been forced to watch so much of this show (it's actually really well done), that recently I amused myself by trying to look up dirty Wiggle gossip and see if anyone was a serial killer when I read about the marriage stuff. It seemed really Disney-esque, a bit too cookie-cutter, but I didn't actually expect it to fall apart so soon. Dang.
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Thread Emma and Lachy are getting a divorce.
Isn't Lachy their music writer, though? They're all multi-threats, but it does seem that he'd be the logical one to go. Emma is just too iconic now and she covers a lot of bases. I'd say Emma and Simon are more valuable than Lachy and Anthony (sorry, Anthony) as front people. Ah, the random shit you debate in your head to stay sane after the 10,000 iteration of "Do the Propeller!"....
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Thread REgals [Women of Era] |OT| Episode I: The Female Menace
What thread is this? And, I saw a girl wearing a shirt with that in impact font at the train station the other day too. Maybe it's a new line or something? And geez @ the encounters above. That's some shit, & . And the rub is, even if you both had said anything, a witty retort or that scathing return, then you'd have to roll reaction dice. 6s and 9s get you screamed at. 7s and 8s get you assaulted further. Snakes eyes and your number's up... You can't win, really.
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Thread What are you currently saving up for?
In general: - House - Kids' funds - Family Japan trip - Retirement Coming up: 5th year anniversary - I'd love to do South Africa, but I figure I'll set myself some more modest tiers before that one and whichever $$$ goal I meet with my books we get to do. I don't like dipping into our accounts for wants so I'll 'work up' to it.
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Thread ParentERA: How many activities are your kids in?
If they're enjoying it and are thriving, good on you. Sounds like they're getting exposed to a wide variety of things. I'm not sure mine will do as much, but I like the mixing of physical and arts activities. Are you finding that having them enrolled in both has any kind of synergistic effect? It does seem to work for some, but I feel drained just contemplating going to the park (the fact that I don't drive but haul the kids everywhere might contribute to that somewhat). #1 is only just 2.5, so I hope I'm not doing her a disservice or something by not having her in something else. She can read a bit and (almost) write her name, so I don't think we're lagging too far behind, but if I went by FB/other moms I've run into, she should be in a min of 3 'clubs' and I should have scrapbooked it all. I know a lot of these parents are going for overkill, but I honestly can't tell what's 'normal' anymore. I don't think my mom did anything like that. We got dropped off at a neighbors house to be babysat while my mom worked and...? I did T-ball when I was 8, I think? Ugh. I feel like such a bad parent sometimes but then sometimes I make giant Lindworms out of Mia's books to surprise her in the morn and feel like a badass. I don't know. I'm making her a spaceship out of boxes tonight. That's got to count for something right? Like .4 of a piano lesson?
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Thread It's cold as fuck in Europe.
As someone who grew up on the East Coast in the US, calling this piddly little snowfall the "beast from the east" does seem a bit ridiculous. I was expecting a lot more. It's barely sticking and I'm in the north of England. Not sure what the panic is all about.
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Thread ParentERA: How many activities are your kids in?
I've wondered this too. I see tons of moms with toddlers online doing gymnastics, swimming, music lessons, sports, crafts, baking 24-7, having themed parties, etc. and I have my 2.5 year old doing...half days at nursery for free play/socialization in the afternoon. In my defense I have an 8 month old too, but it looks exhausting. We'll probably have her do swimming with her dad one day on the weekend soon, but other than that I just don't have it in me right now. I don't remember my mom doing any of this stuff. :/
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Thread Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
I've had 2 glasses of wine but now I want to crack myself in the head with the bottle after trying to read that. Jerk. Thanks.
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Thread Why did you decide to have or not have kids?
You might feel different if that screaming was an every day thing. Or if you had to be the sleep deprived one. Or the one in charge 24-7. Parenting isn't easy, but it is easy to comment from an outside perspective when your own experience has been relatively smooth (as it sounds yours had so far)(congrats, seriously). For my part, I think I "have it easy" compared to many, rather than it being easy. Harder than some and nowhere near as bad as others. Neither of my girls slept properly for the first 6-7 months. My first daughter would wake 6+ times a night to breastfeed and I got maybe 3-4 hours of sleep a night in tiny chunks until I sleep trained her. My second daughter was also a crap sleeper because, as I later found out, she has a cow's milk allergy and was in such gassy pain that she'd wake 3-4 times a night and take 1-2hrs to de-gas and soothe. It was a different kind of sleep deprivation, but it was constant and I'm the stay at home parent so I couldn't just tap out. I had to care for both kids (2 under 2) even if I'd had no sleep for days. It was hard. I broke a few times because a human can't function all the time like that. If you look at my tag you'll see I work in games. I used to do crunch until my hair fell out and I dropped to 97lbs. I know what it's like to work hard. This was harder. For the breastfeeding thing, give your wife waaaaaaay more credit. Even if she likes it, it's painful and draining, and if she doesn't (like me) it's mentally awful on top. For the dad thing, yep. There's not much to 'connect to' at such an early age, tbh, so don't worry about it. You don't seem particularly bothered, but you mentioned the miracle thing so there's that vs. the reality that still might weight on you. It's kind of the same for many moms too, though. I'm not the homemaker type and though I wanted kids I personally roll my eyes at the whole love at first sight thing. I'd kill anyone threatening my children, but there was no teary eyed moment of gushy love. It was all practical until I started getting to know what I'd helped create. They're damned interesting, though! Just wait till your kid hits 18+ months. Way more fun and weird.
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Thread Why did you decide to have or not have kids?
I mean, I'm not trying to sell you on it all or anything, but the bold is definitely just, well, you. People (most, anyway) who say they enjoy their kids or the experience aren't lying to themselves. There's a lot of drudgery, no arguments there, but if you go in not wanting kids it's (understandably) going to color your experience. The no social life, no money, no fun isn't some immutable kid-state either. It does get better and you will be able to balance stuff. You're only at the 2 month mark, after all. When the kid gets a bit older and starts sleeping through the night, taking regular naps, etc. you'll be able to reclaim some of your time. All that said, if it is as easy as you say, why is it dragging you down so much? Are you a guy, by chance? I only ask because for a lot of guys (my husband included) it was really hard to make any connection with the grub like thing that shits all the time until she was ~6 months and started developing a personality. I think it's tougher for guys in that respect for sure. As for the "people who say parenting is hard" bit, that's pretty off base. You might be the most patient and caring and hard working person ever and sometimes the kid will be a struggle to get through every day. Just check out the parent thread for people's experiences. Not everyone gets a baby that is chill or sleeps or is perfectly healthy. I feel pretty lucky with mine as it's been generally what I expected (average difficulty), but my lovely sister got a level zero baby (zero effort needed kid) while my lovely teacher sister in law got a kid that took 3 adults working round the clock to manage the first two years. It's roulette sometimes. You just do your best. Anyway, I hope you find some satisfaction or worth in it in the future, for your own sake.
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Thread Why did you decide to have or not have kids?
Like DG said, no need to rush into it, but having kids is kind of like being out of shape and then joining a gym. It can be painful at first and definitely exhausting, but you 'shape up' enough to deal with it and even thrive. You get used to it, and stuff that seems daunting from the outside right now becomes Tuesday. My husband and I have two kids, a 2.5yr old and an 8 month old and he still goes to the gym 4x a week, after putting them down we get our 'adult' time from 7-11 (or however long we can/want to stay up), we split a day on the weekend where he gets 3-4hrs of free time and then I do, etc. Whenever these threads come up people without kids act like your life, life, ceases or something. I still play video games, write, read, travel... I don't feel like we're worse off now that before kids. Hell, with all the planning I have to do concerning food, I feel like we spend less for our family of four than we did with just the two of us. Anyway, no rush, but yeah, you adjust. It ain't bad.
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Thread What are some easy dinners that aren't frozen meals
Thanks yo~ Didn't come out too badly for end meat, right? Give it a go! You can also gussy up cheap (or any) steak by cooking some garlic in the oil you plan on frying it up in on low until they're golden, then remove the cooked garlic, then crank the pan up to high again and drop the steak in. Garlic oil essence + salt and pepper is damned good!
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(10920662)

Thread What are some easy dinners that aren't frozen meals
Do you have spices/basics in your cupboard already (salt, pepper, soy sauce, olive oil, butter, etc.)? If you have those you can do tons of stuff. For recipes, both of these here can be done in 10-20mins. Salmon on rice: Rice, salmon, salt, pepper Optional - Lemon to squeeze over salmon, mushrooms/spinach/garlic/spring onions to mix into the rice Cook rice (rice cooker awesome if you have one)(short-medium grain recommended) Olive oil into a hot pan w/ a knob of butter, season salmon (salt, pepper, etc) and drop into pan Cook until desired doneness Drop on rice Profit For optional stuff: Chop mushrooms then drop into pan with melted butter Cook for ~5 mins until some of the liquid is released Add chopped garlic, cook for 1 min Add ~tbl spoon soy sauce, cook for a few mins Mix into rice Profit I use skin on fillets because skin is heavenly, but for savings, Walmart sells 2lb bags of salmon fillets for mad cheap. Recommend using lemon on those to bump it up a bit. Marinated steak salad: Cheapest cut of meat you can find (I used rump) Drop steak into ziplock w/ the juice of 2 limes, chili flakes, and a few crushed garlic cloves Let it marinate for at least 20mins Prep salad bits (lettuce, tomatoes, and crumbly feta works nicely)(a little bit of olive oil also works as a dressing and doesn't clash with the marinade) Take meat out, salt and pepper both sides and cook to desired doneness Let rest a few mins Slice and drop over salad bits Profit You can add whatever you want to the salad bits and switch up the marinade easily. I think both of these are nice, easy, and cheap, but not sure what your budget or skill level is.
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Thread Why did you decide to have or not have kids?
Sorry for your losses, honest. I lost one, too, but I can't even imagine what you've been through. My condolences. Good luck, eZipsis! ! I have two cats and like money too. Kids have not been the destroyer of lives (thus far) as so many seem to think. Yeah. It can't really be conveyed, and I don't try to sell people on it. All I can say is that ultimately it's been unreal (to me) rewarding overall. Definitely insane and hard sometimes, but worth it.
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Thread Why did you decide to have or not have kids?
Not sure what made me change my mind, exactly, but at ~28 I came around to the idea of having kids and decided that that's what I wanted. I was pretty anti-kid prior to that. I think finally being happy with myself, my progress, and general life made me really think about it. My boyfriend didn't feel the same, though, and was staunchly anti-kids, so I ended the relationship and moved on. Now I'm married and recently had my second kid. Debating on a third. So why? It's kind of the ultimate human experience and I wanted to experience it, I guess. My genes aren't anything special, but I think I have something to offer as a parent, and raising them has been a real trip. Pretty amazing, all in all.
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Thread Era, Do You Feel That Your Dreams Came True?
Cheers! I'm pretty happy with the way things are going so far, but it's kinda scary in a way too. Like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's almost...too good? Suspicious... :) But, I'm sorry to hear it's not quite heading the same way for you yet. You working towards anything particular? I see what you mean, but for stuff like the weight thing, sometimes you spend years yearning to be something else, try lots of things and still can't seem to reach where you want to be then suddenly one day you look down and , there it is, it seems like more of a dream than a goal met. Managing depression, though. That's a major goal, and better than most dreams. 'Grats, yo.
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Thread Era, Do You Feel That Your Dreams Came True?
Sorry. Couldn't help myself when they worded it like that. It's not all stars and rainbows, though. I'm currently on hiatus from my career because the baby is still <1 year (and I have a 2yr old), and holy hell does it require a lot of coffee and booze to make it through the days sometimes.
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(10895353)

Thread How much "looks" on your date/partner matters?
Hmmm...I do appreciate a pretty face, but being fit and having drive/personality is way more of an attractive 'feature' to me. Even going just purely by face, I like a good scar or broken nose. Pretty much this too.
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Thread LTTP: John "Aimbot" Wick 2
It was decent dirty fun, but they overused the same mechanic so the ending had zero impact. Very fun world, and loved the mute assassin. Wish they'd actually shown off some of her skills instead of setting her up for a fight that she was doomed to lose, though. All the characters cool, but had no substance in the end (except for Common).
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(10895253)

Thread How many countries have you visited?
Think I'm around 40 countries now? I've lived in 7 different ones, and have hit every continent except SA and Antarctica. Saw the thread about not getting it (traveling) as a bucket list item, but it's big on my goal list. Too much fun! Money not necessarily needed! I never had any when I was young, but I wanted to see the world, so I applied to ESL programs that taught overseas in exchange for a plane ticket and a week of 'touring'. Went to China twice with $60 to my name. Was a bit shady, but totally worth it! Maybe something like that would an option for you?
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Thread Brit Reset, how're you doing in this hell heat?
Hell heat? Haha. Man, you guys really aren't used to extremes, huh? We don't even use AC at home. I have an old fan going, but it's mostly for the cats because they can't take off their fur coats.
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Thread Brit Reset, how're you doing in this hell heat?
I guess I should have worded it more, tolerance(?) of extremes? Adaptability? I'm not from a place that gets crazy hot either, but I don't melt into a puddle. I know OP is just being exaggerated in his delivery, but even on the news they make it sound like the end of times. It was the same with the "Beast from the East" stuff. I got all excited and it was a big nothing in my area. :(
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Thread What are your red flags during a first date
On a first date? Aside from the usual ones: - Cash splashing - Touching me constantly for no reason - Talking at me, not to me - Not being ready/no grooming - Taking me shopping for garbage cans
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Thread What are your red flags during a first date
You know, when I declined to take him up on a third date he demanded to know why, so I told him and it was something like that. Weird to feel like an old girlfriend or an afterthought on a second date. He proceeded to curse me out and harass me, even so far as loitering around my block where I lived. A year later I got a random drunk(?) text from him begging me to go on another date so he could make it up to me. He even had he said. Oh, LA. So, yes. Let this be an example to guys of why many women don't give guys direct rejections or ghost the next time one of those threads pop up. :P Everyone did tell me that was my first mistake, but I always take public transportation, so I tend to see other commuters as like-minded people. I think it was just his age, tbh. He was immature and yet overconfident. Oh well. Makes a good story.
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Thread What are your red flags during a first date
A stellar 'date' I had with a guy who asked me out on the bus. It wasn't the first date exactly (we split an izakaya for the first one), but it was the next meeting where he said he was taking me out. He made a big deal of it, but when I met him at his place to walk there he wasn't even dressed or showered, the place he'd picked out was Tex-Mex which I'd told him I hated the date before, and instead of eating he dragged me along to go garbage can shopping first... It only got worse from there, but I think I should have just bailed when he dithered over a 240L blue plastic bin.
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Thread WritersEra |OT| Publish before you die
Cheers for the breakdown, Emerson. That's a lot of really good info, and I've always wanted to hear a firsthand take of using ads. That these were all timed with your release makes it extra valuable. Be worth it to add to the OP maybe? I've always wondered how an animated book trailer would do on targeted sites, too. Have you considered that? Run on sites where the audience is already specifically in your corner might get more results. Interesting that KU is one of the better avenues. Even though they keep cutting the 'take', I guess the audience is just that big that you're bound to get eyes. I actually got another royalty payment the other day for the challenge we did over a year ago(?) after months and months of silence. There's always someone out there, I guess. :D Shame their ad system didn't bear more fruit for you, though. I'm with you on the reviews, but as someone who owes a couple of reviews to people myself, I'm part of the problem. Speaking of reviews I owe... Yay! You've got quite the library going now, so I'd imagine it'll just keep building. Might be worth throwing the collections on other sites like LibraryThings (since I noticed you weren't on there as far as I could see) during your next event (release, themed giveaway, etc.). Congratulations! Always awesome to hear about what you're up to, especially D&D inspired stuff. Did you ever find that artist you were looking for? We really do need a 'Commission' thread or promo thread on Era. There are tons of great artists and creators on here who are probably up for some idle fancy. Be cool. Heaven is a library filled with roaring fires, secret alcoves, and books as far as the imagination can conceive. :) You are so so right about reading. It's such a joy even just anticipating cracking open that chapter you left off the night before. It's also, as you said, essential for your own writing. To see how it's done, to be inspired, to see how not to do it. Even the worst book is worth it because you can appreciate that someone, no matter how bad it is, finished it and put it out there. So, yup. Writing without reading is silly. And a waste! Soooo many good books, so little time... Really cool to hear how you came around to it all too. Winning on your first attempt? Dang. I wrote a lot when I was in my own doldrums, too, but no one hands out awards for FFVII fanfiction no matter how and revolutionary it is. Anyway, looking forward to more updates on your progress. Will hopefully have some updates of my own soon.
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Thread Male friends vs. Female friends
I get along just fine with both, but most of my friends tend to be guys because of hobbies/work/social-style. It's entirely my experience, but I just find guys generally easier spend longer periods of time with. I know plenty of cool ladies too. I imagine it was just my upbringing/media influence that's skewed me a bit.
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Thread Zwei: The Ilvard Insurrection |OT| Dual gourmets, too punny, a 2-for-1 Falcom sampler
, even. And baking. And stabbing gourds at all hours of the night just to touch the heart of that one cynical FPS player who also has a thing for cats and vegetable vandalism.
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Thread Zwei: The Ilvard Insurrection |OT| Dual gourmets, too punny, a 2-for-1 Falcom sampler
Yo, looked into that for you. There wasn't a block/proper embargo per se, just a restriction on anything past chapter 3 because the earlier builds weren't perfect at the time (remember the delay/QA blog) and had some major crash issues, Japanese text issues, etc. Chapter 4 on, things got wonky, so that's why there was a section limit. Endless loops of death sound cool and all, but not in a positive way, exactly. ^_^;
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Thread "Demon Child" holds plane hostage for 8 hours
I just came back from a 7 hour flight from the States with a 2 year old and a 7 month old, and the fear is real that your kid(s) is going to go off the rails no matter what you do. Key word is "do," though, and most parents I know and see are doing everything they can not to bother others. I don't know why the mom just seemingly let him run amok. Fatigue, being ground down if he's difficult 24-7, or not just giving a fuck. Who knows, but this is definitely an exception (a horrible one, to be sure). Know that most parents are at code red during these times and do very much care. Don't let stuff like this make you give the 'eyes' to the next parents you see on a plane with a crying baby/toddler.
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Thread Normalisation of 'plus-size' risks hidden danger of obesity, study finds (Read OP)
You can cook stuff yourself that tastes way better than a McRib and is cheaper (stretched over a few meals), but it takes effort and people will make all kinds of excuses to not make an effort. It's ridiculous the lengths we go to tell ourselves x, y, and z is too hard. Anyway, I'm not directing this at you (unless you're arguing this for yourself?). I'm just frustrated because I run into this same argument with my sister. She's always been pretty hefty, but recently she blew up to over 200lbs and she's only 5'2". In part it's due to medication she takes for her transplant (though it's supposed to stabilize after a year which she is far past), but mostly it's just her shitty eating habits and excuses. She's got gestational diabetes now and STILL eats at McDonalds because she's 'hungry/doesn't want to cook/it tastes better/it's convinient' BS.
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Thread Normalisation of 'plus-size' risks hidden danger of obesity, study finds (Read OP)
Sorry, I worded that wrong. I didn't mean that the average woman was that weight, just that there were so many people way skinnier that it feels big. Yes? It's exactly what I said, I'm in the healthy range 'just'. And I never related BMI to clothes at all. I never even brought it up, you did. I just said that the sizing has changed like crazy over the years, in part due to vanity sizing and it's made 'small' something not really small anymore. Edited: Zoe just mentioned my weight, not bmi.
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Thread Normalisation of 'plus-size' risks hidden danger of obesity, study finds (Read OP)
I'm 5'3.5, and it might seem tiny by today's standards, but I'm hardly miniature. I'd have been above average in the '70s or even '80s, I'd warrant. It's not, actually. At 5'3.5" I'm still in the healthy range (just). But that's why all this sizing stuff is so crazy. I'm not super skinny yet I have to find 0 or 00 sizing in the US to fit, and in the UK a size 4? But they don't carry that anywhere, and they list size 8 as 'S'. It's absurd. There was an article on this a couple of years ago and it showed that Brigitte Bardot in the '70s was a size 8. Today? She'd be a UK(?) 0.
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Thread Normalisation of 'plus-size' risks hidden danger of obesity, study finds (Read OP)
Yep. Or into the children's section which is hella weird. Even trying to buy online, it seems the smallest most come down to is a UK 8 whereas there's almost always an option for XL or XXL. I have a devil of a time shopping anywhere but Japan, and I don't think I'm all that tiny.
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Thread Normalisation of 'plus-size' risks hidden danger of obesity, study finds (Read OP)
I'm a bit late to this thread, but I think a huge part of the battle is convincing people that 1) they can lose tons of weight by cooking their own food, 2) it isn't hard/time consuming, and 3) it doesn't have to be expensive. As someone who lost 35lbs and has kept it off for over twelve years now (from 140+lbs to 105lbs) even after having two children, I'd be happy to share some of the cheap-but-good-and-easy recipes I use (like baking your own bread sans all the sugar you get in store bought versions!). I get that it's boring as hell to think you can only eat boiled chicken/rice and the like and cost is a concern, so as a bit of positive direction from all this, why not do a recipe jam with other posters? Approaching cooking your own food like a chore can kill your motivation, while turning it into a creative activity can help you lose that weight and boost your mood. Win-win!
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Thread I Can't Deal With NPCs Anymore, or How Trails in the Sky Ruined Gaming for Me
Sounds like you need one of these: All 700+ rows... If it's any consolation, people give me shit about the reformatting thing from SC (even though it was not possibleeeeeadmsrdhdc&^#%ghvy,jg!). :D
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Thread TolkienERA |OT| Renewed shall be the blade that was broken
This seems to be the place for this, so... I got this a bit ago to reward myself for making a human: Tonight's the first chance I've had to crack it open, but just having it makes me feel warm inside. I'm a massive Tolkien fan, and I enjoy boring people with Middle Earth tidbits whenever the movies are playing. I imagine this will give me even more ammo. I think I need that Tolkien: Maker of Middle-earth Collector's Edition too now...
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Thread CricketERA |OT1| "Weird, a bit random, not what I was expecting"
My feelings as well. I really like that about the Aussie sporting mentality. I think the punishment handed down from this will definitely send a message to anyone else contemplating the same. Was Warner really that disliked? I mean before all this. I know he was a bit of a hothead and a jerk in the past, but he seemed to have settled down after wife/kid and seemed solid generally. I liked him well enough from what I saw anyway. Haven't followed cricket as closely as before since moving to England, though. Yeah. When I thought it was only going to be a one game suspension or some other slap on the wrist I was pretty disappointed, but this seems about right. Harsh, but right. What they did wasn't anything much for some, but it seems to have done some serious damage to the sport's image/integrity, so I think it's fair. This will stay with Warner and Smith for the rest of their careers, but they deserve another chance to come back from it (if anyone's willing to have them). :( Man, that hits me. Like, I'm glad they're really stamping down on this thing, but it's painful to see someone so destroyed, especially if it's true that he was mostly just covering for Warner. I really liked Smith and I hope he's able to get some of the respect back eventually and return properly.
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Thread CricketERA |OT1| "Weird, a bit random, not what I was expecting"
Has anybody said/theorized why they'd take such a risk in the first place? I'm still trying to wrap my head around that. It just doesn't seem worth it on any level. Pros: Beat SA...? Cons: Get caught Get demoted Get fined Taint integrity of the sport Taint reputation of team Taint personal legacy Ruin career Embarrass self Embarrass country Etc., etc. With all the cameras around you'd almost certainly be caught, so just...why? I haven't been following this test/the sport very closely this year, so maybe I've missed some all-consuming need to win this game, but it just doesn't seem to make any sense. This couldn't have just been about all the stupid sledging going on, right?
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Thread CricketERA |OT1| "Weird, a bit random, not what I was expecting"
So you think it's endemic. Like diving in soccer kind of? They just see it like strategy. I guess Smith did say everyone does it for 'advantage'. That's pretty effing lame. Makes me not want to watch it anymore. A bit of sledging, fine, that just seems to be a guy thing in sports and can be ignored, but the level it's gotten to (the pettiness, the wife thing) coupled with apparent normalized cheating is just a huge turnoff. I don't like the burn and raze it to the ground approach that seems to be the popular option these days, but I don't see how they're going to correct this now (i.e. keep/bring back fans) unless they let the 'leadership' group go. Am I overestimating the damage? Are people OK with just a few suspensions/fines? I know Faf seemed to have gotten past his own cheating instances just fine and still plays. I don't know if I'll tune in again except for T-20 now, though.
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Thread CricketERA |OT1| "Weird, a bit random, not what I was expecting"
Yeah, their attitude certainly made everything way more glaring and it blew up (deservedly so, it seems), but you think it should be legal? Why can't they just play as is? I really hate sneaky stuff like this and diving and have always found it strange that ppl are cool with it. I know it probably only results in a slight advantage if any, so is that why you're ok with it (in general)? Are you of the same opinion as bomma man, then? About the legality point? Aren't they a parody site? Seems like their usual according to the husband.
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Thread CricketERA |OT1| "Weird, a bit random, not what I was expecting"
I feel the same. It just doesn't make sense to me on any level. I'm not even Australian (my husband who is introduced it to me), but it hurts. Smith was the last person I expected to do something like this. I guess I completely misjudged him. That or they had him do it as insurance in case they got caught they could chalk it up to the 'young fella' making a rookie error or something trying to help them win. I don't know, but agreed that it'll colour his entire career from here on out. Damned shame.
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Thread BritERA
Guys, I've been here for almost two years now and I'm still confused. Do I or don't I tip at pubs? I'm sitting here in a nice craft tavern writing and I've got one more hour/pint before I have to head back, and I'm wondering if I should be tipping, not tipping, tip at the end, or... Please help, I've been ruined by America.
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Thread BritERA
Awesome. Thank you. I just wasn't sure because it's a nicer place than your typical pub, it's Cheshire (and they seem big(?) on tipping here), and the bartender sent me a freebie because of a pest at the bar. I still feel like I should do something, but at least I know it's generally not the norm, which is reassuring. Cheers! It's just confusing because this area always seems to have a 'tip' line on the bills, so I never know what to do. As I've just moved to this town too and it's fairly small, I don't want to leave a bad impression since I'll be coming back quite a bit.
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Thread Did You “Date” Older When You Were in High School? (Potentially Sensitive Subject for Some)
I mean, it's normal as in, not unusual (especially the 'wanting' part), but it looks pretty skeevy(?)/sad to many in the sense that you're going for people way out of your age/experience as if you don't have the maturity to date someone your own age or you're aiming for younger to take advantage of their relative inexperience. Many women prefer older men, though, just as many older men prefer younger women.
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Thread Did You “Date” Older When You Were in High School? (Potentially Sensitive Subject for Some)
I didn't think anything odd of it at the time, but the only guys who were interested in me were always at least 10 years older. I briefly saw a 27 year old, a 29 year old, and had a couple of dates with a 36 year old when I was 17 and then 18. I was already in college then, though, so it didn't seem so weird. Seems kinda eh now, I guess.
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Thread Annihilation |OT| A Shimmer Out Of Space [Spoilers]
Watched it on a whim because someone made a thread here about a decent horror film and...wow. Not quite horror, and not what I expected, but thoroughly enjoyable. The ending was a bit mmmmm for impact, but thought provoking enough. I adored the bear and that uber unsettling 'copy' scene with Lena. Can't imagine how Kane's copy and Lena (Key and Lock?) are supposed to get out of quarantine, though (unless the copy and her own blood voodoo perfected outside of the shimmer?). And agree with your interpretation, Twentieth.
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Thread FIFA World Cup 2018 |OT5| Sterling Alli Lingard Trippier | Quarter-Finals begin Friday (READ OP)
Too bad Neymar has made it the boy who cried wolf. Burning his own team at this point.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Pre-34 they'll try and delay you for as long as they're able so that the lungs can develop to a fair point (they were hoping to keep my sister going a few more days to hit that milestone, but the baby had other ideas), but yeah, generally it's you pop, it's game on in the next 24 hours. That's what I was told too.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Wow. Really? I knew they'd try to have you keep it in a bit longer if it's pre-34 weeks, but I thought they were pretty anxious about the water breaking because of the risk of infection. Can't imagine being sent home for weeks. My sister didn't even make it 4 hours. I got a text at 1 this morning that she'd had a girl. Sucker just flew right out! At least you have a 5 year old to help that's also potty trained! I've heard that's actually a really good age gap. You guys'll get back into the swing soon. Might have to switch to something a bit slower game-wise like Firewatch, though. :) Hope everything goes smoothly for the birth! Thank ya~
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Wow! Congrats! It'll be rough at first, but you guys hit the jackpot. We have two girls and now have to contemplate a 3rd. ;_; Thanks. Everyone's a bit panic stations, but I'm sure it'll work out. It's a shame it's happening right in the middle of the reunion, though. My sister might have to stay in hospital for a while. She's gutted. Me too if that happens. :/
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
It's not just you. I don't think about my personal health so much, but my mortality is in neon lights right now. The idea of possibly checking out early and not being able to protect my kids/see them to adulthood haunts me. It's hella weird and scary. Of course, worrying about losing them is 1000x more scary. :( 25? Mine's 2+ and likes curry/a bit of spice, so when she asked to 'smell' the chili spice (she 'helps' cook) I stupidly took the lid off for a sniff but instead she inhaled a bunch. I felt horrible. The next day I gave her some of the fresh pizza I'd made for dinner. It had chilies on it. I was the worst mom on the planet that day too. :(
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Haha, yeah. I imagine French moms are having waaaay more fun than the rest of us. And I'm so with your wife. I rock up to our local tap house and they're like, "Full pint, not half, right?" :D Mine wasn't/weren't too bad. We got the red cheeks, sleeping tons, and not wanting to eat much variety, but #1 slept fine with the occasional Calpol dose before bed on really bad days. For eating, cooled sweet potato/purees seemed to work best. My sister-in-law's daughter went the full gamut with throwing up, high fever, red cheeked, super irritable, not eating, though. Child seemed down right demonic sometimes. She used a lot of fridgable teething necklaces to help. Is yours mot wanting to eat quite a bit?
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
The lists they give you are absurd. I understand the need to be cautious to a degree, but they just lump everything on a 'danger list' if there's even the tiniest chance a problem might happen. It's like they're trying to make an already tough time even more joyless. -_- I don't want to encourage you to take unnecessary chances (like eating some back-alley poke), but if you go for a second, you'll might find yourself rolling your eyes at all the restrictions you followed during round one. Just use common sense and avoid the bigger problem foods, I say*. *I've been known to eat questionably fresh things without noticing and have a cast iron stomach. Take with a grain of salt. EDIT to add: Sushi is back on the OK list, btw. It's all flash frozen in the states, so parasites are killed off. Just make sure you get it from a decent/clean-looking place.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
I mean, I know all that since I've carried two babies to term. I'm just annoyed as the one subjected to these lists by both doctors and the general public. The looks I'd get for buying cheese or ordering a steak medium rare to say nothing of the actual comments you get. Like I said, I understand why they give you these lists (why wouldn't you try to minimize as many risks as possible?), but I personally find them over the top. Your likelihood of getting a dodgy cheese is certainly far, far less than your chance of getting into a fender bender (in terms of death you are 126x more likely to die in a car accident this year than you are to die of Listeriosis, apparently). They'll be jamming pregnant women in stasis tubes next to minimize all the risks soon :P. Additionally, as you said, advice varies from doctor to doctor. My Australian midwife even recommended beer every now and then if I felt like it. I think the info is great to have, but the fear mongering that comes with it is all a bit much. It made for a stressful and un-enjoyable pregnancy on top of everything else for me with my first one. I was quite a bit more relaxed with #2 when it came around. But, of course, I'd only recommend people do whatever makes them comfortable. I wouldn't want anyone getting sick because I encouraged them to eat some parma ham.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
I'm relieved that others are watching Little Baby Bum. I was kinda creeped out by it at first (all those dead eyes and that lamb with backward bending knees...), but it's pretty all right. Puffin Rock is good too. Sarah & Duck is the true GOAT, though.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Have an update on the whole weight affair. We got an urgent referral from our GP to go to the bigger hospital since he couldn't see anything wrong with her and we were there for 7 hours doing exams, blood tests, etc. As expected, they too have no idea (blood normal, is happy, seems healthy at least), and they want me to go dairy free to see if she has an allergy (though she has no other symptoms). What joy. I tried the same with Mia when she was super gassy as a baby and it achieved nothing but my own misery since the morning latte is the only thing that keeps me going through the day, the only thing I look forward to after these horrible nights, and the only thing getting me out of bed and functioning. They also wanted us to try dairy free formula to see how she'd respond, but as I mentioned before, she won't take the bottle and wouldn't even after they had me make her wait for three hours to make her extra hungry. Instead I got to listen to my apparently underfed baby cry for hours because she was hungry and I wasn't allowed to feed her. Then they told me I could either stay over night for observation (impossible with another kid) or come back again and they would next use feeding tubes to force feed her and test different formulas. I negotiated one week to see if cutting the dairy from my diet would help, but that failing, it's back to the hospital for feeding tubes. Wahey. Thanks, chica. The house isn't exactly pristine, but I try not to leave caked food on the walls at least. I'm sure my husband would understand if I let it slip more, but I think the mess would only contribute to the overall poor mood. I won't dwell on it, at any rate. Food-wise, almonds were part of the shakes I was drinking and I'd put pistachios on the plain oatmeal when I made it. I'd love the no-bake recipe if you have it handy. But, not sure I can have it now ('dairy denied' as mentioned above). As for Emma, just cross your fingers for me this week. Last chance, it seems. Cheers for sharing your experience. Hoping we see a similar outcome. She is having plenty of wet nappies and all three doctors that saw her said she was well-hydrated, alert, etc., but they're not satisfied and she's past 10 weeks now with no improvement. I've tried supplementing, as I mentioned, but she won't take the bottle whether it has formula or breastmilk. I have no issues topping her up with whatever if it'll help, but nothing is working. We just got two more types to try and I had some small success with the Mam bottle this morning, so hopefully I can start doing this at least twice a day to add to her intake. For the feeding and weigh-in, they had not done that yet, but I imagine they wanted to had I stayed over night for observation. The health visitor will be coming (again) and bringing her scale this time, so I'll ask her to try it then. Sadly she won't take it. They've given us new formula (Neocate?) and I've got some new bottles, though, so fingers crossed. All that would be possible...if I didn't have to mind a 2 yr old (makes pumping nigh impossible more than 1-2x a day) and baby would take the damn bottle. :/ Sorry to hear you guys had to deal with that, though. As much as I didn't care initially about breastfeeding (lukewarm about it, really) it's pretty demoralizing when it doesn't work or work as it should. Everyone keeps looking at you, expecting things or pressuring or there's this lingering implication that you're doing something wrong or don't care enough, etc. The whole thing just sucks. I'll look into the domperidone, though. Thanks, CD.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
It all sounds awful. I'm sorry, Tb. I think my husband has similar pangs of helplessness because there's not a lot he can do and has to leave for work as well, and I know that can take a toll on you even if you're not directly at baby ground zero. But(!), this is where a nanny/babysitter-type person will really help. If you're worried about how to sell it to your wife, remind her that she deserves/needs time to focus on her own work for your future (not just for immediate relief from the situation) and that having a trusted option to watch your child opens up many doors, time for you two as a couple being an important one. If she still balks because maybe she worries that it still comes off as a self-ish or frivolous spend, you can always point out that you to vet someone because you may have an emergency some day. A vetted sitter would be essential there. Anyway, wishing you both luck and relief. Feel free to vent any time. I sure have of late. ^_^; Thanks, man. I'm really hoping this is what they meant and not the kind you see in ICUs. As for the allergy, yeah. I never considered it because, well, she hasn't really shown any signs except gassiness which is not exactly uncommon in babies...
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
I don't suppose anyone has/had low weight gain issues with their babies? It's really starting to do my head in. As part of the system here in the UK, you have your baby weighed a couple of times after birth by health visitors to see how they're doing along a growth chart. Emma started on 50th percentile line and gained really well in the first couple of weeks but has since just gone completely flat. Her 'arc' is more like a rainbow and she's dropped to the 9th percentile at this point (10 weeks). They keep having me come in week after week to weigh her and for the last few weeks I've done everything I can to up my supply and make sure she's full (pumping, fenugreek pills, teas, lactation shakes, eating oatmeal till I feel sick, tried topping her up with pumped milk, formula, etc.) and when I went in today to have her weighed after all of that...she'd gained nothing. Not even an ounce. She seems perfectly healthy in all other respects (we've had 3 evaluations now). There's no tongue tie, no latch issues, she's like a hulk during tummy time, alert, happy/smiling, doesn't act as if she's hungry, etc. It's incredibly frustrating, especially on such shitty sleep. I just don't have the energy to keep doing the 2 mile hike to the clinic every week on top of everything else. They want me to eat more and pump 6x(!) a day now, but it's a struggle to even pump twice a day with a very active 2 year old, 2-3 hrs of sleep a night in pieces, keeping everyone fed and the house from falling into complete squalor. Anyway, I'm mostly just venting. She's currently a medical mystery, apparently, but the health visitors keep riding me and it's stressing me out. Next visit is to the big hospital. Yay... I'm super jealous of your kid sleeping through the night so soon, but I feel ya on the toddler. I'm scared to switch over from the crib for that very reason. Sorry you guys are having such a rough patch with the sleep. It's def hard to go back to crap after full nights again. Fingers crossed for your guest visit.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Tbm, how about just getting a regular sitter to watch your daughter for 3-4hrs/day during the week so that your wife can focus and have some non-crying time? Lots of older folks have free time and fairly cheap rates, or you could even enlist a college kid for some part-time work (maybe put up an ad suggesting childcare majors, etc. get a preferred baby rate). It wouldn't bankrupt you like childcare/daycare and it might be enough to get her over this rough patch. As a mom who also worked from home, I completely empathize with the strain and stresses of never having time to focus on your own work, much less free time. Even just a few hours a day/week of her own time would do wonders for her mental state.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
I was already dreading it, but for her to get sick just from the intro sessions is hilarious (in a sad way). Hope the poor kid perks up by Wed. She really seemed to like school and it's a bit boring for her here cooped up with the rain. But, hey, at least you'll have commiserating company when your #2 starts! Oh yeah, avocado is soooo good. Cram in as much as you can before your kiddo goes off it, Podge!
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
It's pretty common. Both parents are tired, mom still probably feels pretty ugh physically and mentally (especially if the mom is breastfeeding), etc. It's understandable that relations would drop off. But...it can be a pitfall for couples if you lose that intimacy and all focus is put on the baby. I was pretty worried about that since I'd seen it happen to friends so I put in a bit of effort even though I was fried to hell. I made it a goal to aim for at least 2x a week and it really paid dividends for us. I'd say 3x/week was the pre-sleep training average in the end? It's something to talk to your missus about, though. Ask how you can help to get her some extra rest or just offer (an hour to herself for a bath, a nap, taking over some duties, etc.) and/or express how you want to do stuff as a couple/want her to feel special so make her dinner, get a sitter/help for even an hour to just do something together, send her off for a massage/spa... <--in general, not just for sex, obviously. Also, make sure there's nothing else putting her off like physical pain/discomfort. That stuff can linger for months and really kill any desire. Basically, it's not selfish to bring it up or want sex, but it definitely takes extra effort post-kids and can be kind of awkward to discuss bc you both feel weird/sleep deprived. Also, if your 4 month old only wakes once a night, count yourself lucky! ;) As for tricks, all I can suggest pre-6month sleep training is to load him up with solids (puree bc bed) so he won't wake up from hunger. It's prob just habit, though. Thanks. :D It's actually really fun. I open a beer and chuck on a podcast and let my imagination run wild. Good times. Thanks, chica! And awwww about Charlotte. 'Tis the season, eh?
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Avocado is brain food, Podge. Embrace it! Speaking of adventures in parenting... My husband and I have been amusing ourselves by rearranging Mia's playroom at night after she goes to bed. Doing it almost every night is getting challenging, but with little free personal time it's a chore made fun. I'm entertained, anyway.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Today is Mia's first proper day of nursery school! Aaaaand she's already out sick. The mere two trial days before were enough to fell her. :P We started our daughter on sweet potato puree (and some other purees) at 4 months because she was super keen and had no issues. Sweet potato is great because it has lots of iron which they don't get enough of in just breast milk around that point. Makes nice, little, easy to clean cow patties when they poop too! She was also holding and gumming chicken legs to death by 6 months? Having no teeth didn't seem to stop her in the least even though I was a bit anxious at first (nothing hard/crunchy allowed until teeth arrived though). Apparently my husband was eating chicken at 4 months according to his mom... *___*
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
The app is just a free white noise player with a bunch of options on the iphone named "White Noise Lite." By 'trigger' I meant that we start it every time we go into her room to put her down and now just hearing it go on works like a sleep trigger bc she's associated it with bedtime. As soon as we hit the button she starts rubbing her eyes. :) So, DL it and start switching it on right before you put your son down, but have it at half or a lower volume. If he wakes, do your reset (go through whatever routine/feeding you have for bedtime/to get him down again), then raise the volume on the app right before you put him down again. It takes a few days to establish the sound as part of their sleep routine, but once in it helps signal '' and might help you settle him more quickly or in one go. It may or may not work for you as well as it did for us, but hey, it's free and painless to try! Good luck!
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Mine's been helping out with laundry since she was one and a half. I figure that by three she'll be tall enough to put the detergent in and do it all by herself. :D Sorry for your loss, Phoenix.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Pretty cool that he's so keen at this age. Hope you get a lot of mileage out of the scope, whichever one you choose. Tell me you're going to recreate constellations on his ceiling with glow in the dark sticker stars, too. I loved that stuff as a kid. Will probably do it to my kid, interest or no. :D Sounds pretty rough, peppermints. Sorry you guys are having such a time of it. Sleep deprivation is some next level torture for sure. I know it can get pretty dire when nothing seems to be working and you feel like it'll never end. We have friends in kind of the same sit. Kid slept beautifully for months and then stopped cold and they've been nursing her to sleep, through constant wake-ups, and bed sharing since (at 13 months now). One half of the couple isn't emotionally ready for sleep training, though. They've been sleeping in separate beds for months now and I think they're hitting a breaking point too. Anyway, you're probably sick of people telling you it'll pass, but I don't know any 18 year-olds that still need to be rocked to sleep, so somewhere along the line it does end. Probably? :D Advice-wise, can I ask what kind of sleep training you did and how long you guys tried for? Since you guys are close to the weaning stage (1 year)(if that's your cut-off), this might actually be an opportune time to do a big overhaul. Establish a whole new routine and yank the sleeping thing back into a solo thing. I know you're asking for resettling techniques, but it sounds to me like the only way to break the cycle is to go whole hog. If you do just want to try resettling stuff, though, do you guys use a sleep app at all? We used that as a sleep association 'trigger', and kept it at half noise when ours went down, then slowly raised it to full if we had to resettle her. That plus a bit of pressure (hand laid on chest) seemed to do the trick sometimes. Maybe give that a go?
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
It's the third day of doing the home thing with two kids by myself and while in general it's not bad, I have a persistent urge to kill something today. The 22 month old doesn't nap anymore and just kicks her crib hard enough to make windows rattle, the baby is gassy and struggles to sleep unless attached to me like a koala, the cats have gone insane and one keeps yowling at the baby gate because she's too lazy to jump it (doesn't matter what side she's on!). Somebody's getting punted into the sun or I'm opening a bottle of wine early to keep a crime from being committed. I'm with you. Teach them early and they're perfectly capable of doing tons of stuff. Mine feeds the cats by herself and sorts the recycling. She's rubbish at sweeping, though.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Hmmm, it's probably not powerful enough to do everything you want to do, but it's the only telescope I have any firsthand experience with (and still might work for you), but I got a National Geographic 76/350 Compact Telescope for my husband as an intro telescope. It's easy to operate, portable, and powerful for what it is (inexpensive). Might be a good starter one since your kiddo is still pretty young. You can always upgrade when/if he shows a greater interest. And if it gets busted it wont break the bank.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
...No lies...detected. ;_; It's why my book hasn't sold millions yet, isn't it? Curse you, Motheeeeeer! Thanks yo! Just glad that part's over. Phew~ Big congrats, FW! And commiserations. :/ What a shitty thing to happen and the timing makes it 10x worse. Really sorry, man. ? Why haven't you just given her purees? Is there any particular reason you're waiting for a pediatrician's OK on it? We started giving Mia sweet potato mash at 4 months because she was keen as mustard. KEEN. AS. MUSTARD.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Thanks, emag. I say go for it! I need more 2+ kids company as I brave this fresh new hell. :D (Just kidding. It's not that bad -so far-) Adoption's also a possibility, but remembering the few threads we had on that topic, it sounds extremely trying logistically and emotionally. A wonderful thing to do, but man they make it tough for you. Thanks, yo! Cheers! And we did. We're all transferred over to the new place, nice and cozy. Only thing left now is fighting it out with an increasingly dodgy rental agency on the old place... Thanks, chica. She totally looked like an old Asian dude who'd had about 20 beers under his belt that first night, though. As for the move, just glad to have survived it. Thank god my mother was here. Would never have managed it otherwise. Feel bad that her whole trip was essentially packing and waiting around for Taco rather than relaxing with her grandkids, but she definitely saved the day. Thanks, Septimus! And wahey on the name~ It's, unfortunately, featured in the top 10 lists for ages, but it's just so classic-sounding. Short, feminine without being over the top, works in Japanese (for us), etc. It won out in the end despite the list thing. Was partial to Elora, too, though. Happy to hear it didn't last too long. I think 3 days is about as much as any sleep-deprived parent can take before going off the edge. For the sickness average, though, that sounds insane! Mia will be 2 in a few months and she's been sick... 0.5 times. I say 0.5 because she only threw up once and I'm pretty sure that's because she'd been jiggled in the Ergo too long. Is that like a daycare kid average? I heard that's what gets them.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Well, it finally happened. 40w+3 'Taco' made her entrance, heralding in the first snow of the season. Round 2 was lightning fast and props to Macclesfield Hospital for having a waterbirthing room with in-built entertainment. Yes, that IS a disco ball. Yes, it rotated. Yes, they had a selection of funky music that was available. The storm-bringer (Emma) pictured below. She was born the day before the move which made things very, um, challenging, but so far this place is brilliant, so maybe that eviction was the best thing that could have ever happened. Yay, fireplace!
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Sorry for double post! Hoping its cleared up at this point, but man that sounds tough. My sister-in-law's kid seems to be sick constantly and doing the round the clock screaming/puking thing and I can't even imagine. Hope your kiddo is OK and your sanity intact, Slek. Any time you want to pop in and just write down how you're feeling or talk through any of this stuff, please do. I'm a woman, but we have lots of dads in here. While there's nothing I can say that can even hope to touch on the scope of what's happened to you and your wife, many of us have experience with loss on some level, so you're in good company. Don't hesitate to share.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
$7000? Nefarious! I thought that didn't count for 'classic' (common)(heh) names. I'll have to measure her by her sister and see what happens. I'm with your wide, though. A one "m" Emma looks kinda lopsided. Hahaha. Can't win, right? I actually feel like you're spot on that "Henry" will be the next royal baby. Maybe you should take out a bet on it? Did you find yourselves () liking names that you found out later were featured heavily in the top picks lists? I wonder what it is that steers us towards those names at the same time. I loved Olivia, Ava, Sophia, etc., and then found out everyone and their cousin were naming their kids that. Before that I adored Aden and found out the same thing. :( Stupid brain! I'm really dreading when this happens to us. We've had such consistency since I did the training at 6 months that it's always a shocker when she cries in the middle of the night. 90% of the time she settles herself, but having to do resets always makes me nervous. The nights after those my husband and I are on psychic pins and needles dreading hearing the cry that means a pattern is starting...
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Thanks, guys. Paperwork just cleared and the contract is signed! We move...in 4 days. I'm still hauling the bowling ball. My due date is today. Doesn't feel like anything internal is moving at all, though. Hahahahaha...ha... We are so fucked. :D A bit. We had 'electronics' issues where instead of reading or playing or engaging with Mia, they had a tendency to just whip out their phones and show her pictures even though we'd made a point of trying really hard not to have people do that. They've pretty much had to be the second parent to my sister-in-law's kid, though, so I think they're just fried on kids at this point, but it was still kinda bad. So, what I did to make it not be me telling them to stop behavior was to frame it like we'd been bad and we needed their help to remind us not to do it. That served to warn them that they shouldn't do it either without making it weird. Seemed to work. Maybe try that kind of reverse tactic?
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Housing update: Looks like we may have found a place! It's pretty far from here, but it's everything we've wanted from a place, minus the extra commute. Just waiting to see if our application checks go through. If they do, we're planning on moving...in the next 2 weeks... Guess it's time to buy a baby wrap to strap kid #2 to my back. :P Sept! Kitchen islaaaaand! Book your ticket now. Cider will be served~ Hmmm, well, that involves the husband which is part of the problem. It'd be no issue if I could wrangle him in, but he's even worse than me when it comes to doctors or dentists, plus his job is super high pressure and time off is incredibly difficult to wrangle. He's really done their heads in refusing to travel internationally right now. :P That's why I was wondering about a 'solo' parent attempting this. My mom made it here in time (after missing her flight...), though, so maybe I can schedule the check-up while I have an extra pair of hands. Sorry to hear that RD. It's tough not to share the news when it happens. We had a similar thing with our first go, although we'd warned family it might not stick. Was still a shock when it actually didn't. :( Drop in any time if you want to talk about it more. It's something a lot of us have gone through, so you're among like company. My husband has and it made him pretty sad. He knows it's because I'm with her 24-7 and he only sees her briefly in the morn and at night/weekends, but I can tell it hurts him pretty bad sometimes. It's just one of those time things. It'll pass, but in the meantime, you can try and just carve out "Daddy" things if you have the time. Mine does the teeth brushing and grocery shopping with her now. That seems to have helped a lot.
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Thread ParentERA |OT| What To Expect When You’re Not Sleeping
Yeah, it's pretty lame. Can't say they knew, though I doubt that would make much of a difference, tbh. Since they're overseas and removed from it all, so to speak, it